When Ur Not Really Happy But Not Sad Either Ur Just……… Voiding Around

“You will be too much for some people. Those aren’t your people.”

— Unknown

1)Van Gogh +Paul Valéry, from Collected Works, The Voice of Things 2) May Sarton, from a journal entry.

Well the question is "why are you sad when you get home??"

People say, stop thinking about things that pains you. It's your time at home with your parents, enjoy , have fun, spend time with them.

Well I am sorry , I tried but I can't. I ain't that person even after several trials. I am not trying anymore .

I am home. In my space where I can breathe , I can talk without people judging me. I am alone with my vulnerable self. I am sad, trying to feel my pain.

I am feeling things deeply. If I am going through something that is uncomfortable or painful or hard, I am allowing myself to dive into those emotions or allow myself to numb them. I don't wanna kill my pain through television or spending time with friends or Instagram. I chose not to protect myself from pain because it demands to be felt . Pain demands to be felt . Coz I feel it will show up in other ways if I do not deal with it now.

“There are two types of people you will meet in your life. One will run a finger down the index of who you are and jump straight to the parts of you that peak their interest. The other will take his or her time reading through every one of your chapters and maybe unfold corners of you that inspired them most. You will meet these two people; it is a given. It is the third that you’ll never see coming. That one person who not only finishes your sentences, but keeps the book.”

— Unknown

The mask of hypocrisy may hide the face, but it can never conceal the truth in one's heart.

Reminder to the self

Life is a balance between holding on and letting go

-Rumi

It actually feels good when people are around you even if u r craving for a me time, and I realized that having too much of" me time" is depressing af

6/9/23

I'm glad that I'm not a person who acts impulsively

I'm glad that I'm not "go getter person "

Cuz if i was, there wud have been nothing in this world to stop me from banging my head against the wall so damn hard that i could witness the bloodiest self murder