James: Please Tell Me I’m Imagining That I Got Drunk And Claimed I Was The King Of All Ducks.

James: Please tell me I’m imagining that I got drunk and claimed I was the King of All Ducks.

Matthew: I would, but then I’d be lying to the King of All Ducks.

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More Posts from Lasthourstid and Others

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Kidnapper: Did you order a pizza?

Simon: … maybe

Kidnapper: So, you found a phone and instead of calling someone for help, you ordered a pizza?

Simon: Are you mad that I used your card?

Kidnapper: You wHaT?

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alec lightwood jace herondale clary fairchild tsc the mortal instruments city of glass isabelle lightwood cassandra clare tmi city of heavenly fire the shadowhunter chronicles simon lovelace simon lewis city of lost souls city of ashes clary fray city of bones clarissa fairchild izzy lightwood tmi gang cassie clare city of fallen angels herondale simon lightwood jonathan christopher herondale lightwood tsc incorrect quotes tmi the mortal instruments tmi incorrect quotes the mortal instruments incorrect quotes

79 notes View Post

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Will: How about have a seat? Maybe you'd like a glass of water?

Matthew: Anything with a little more kick?

Will: Seriously, Matthew, you're in my office.

Matthew: You're right. I don't know what I was thinking-

Will, pouring whisky in two glasses: You want ice, you're out of luck.

Tags

the last hours cassandra clare will herondale the shadowhunter chronicles matthew fairchild chain of gold chain of gold incorrect quote chain of gold memes tlh gang

41 notes View Post

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Julian: It's really cold outside.

Kit: Just like my heart.

Julian: Now is not the time to debate which one of us is more dead inside.

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cassandra clare the dark artifices julian blackthorn emma carstairs ty blackthorn kit herondale jesse blackthorn tda lord of shadows queen of air and darkness christopher herondale lady midnight livvy blackthorn dru blackthorn mark blackthorn cassie clare tavvy blackthorn herondale tda gang helen blackthorn carstairs tda spoilers tda incorrect quotes the dark artifices incorrect quotes julian atticus blackthorn The Dark Artifices TDA

294 notes View Post

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Simon: Hey, what is your greatest fear?

Alec: Losing a loved one

Simon: That’s deep…

Simon: … mine is the kool aid man, but I feel kinda stupid about it now

Tags

alec lightwood jace herondale clary fairchild tsc the mortal instruments city of glass cassandra clare tmi city of heavenly fire the shadowhunter chronicles simon lovelace simon lewis city of lost souls city of ashes magnus bane city of bones izzy lightwood alexander lightwood tmi gang cassie clare city of fallen angels simon lightwood lovelace lightwood lightworm tsc incorrect quotes tales of the shadowhunter academy tmi the mortal instruments tmi incorrect quotes the mortal instruments incorrect quotes

190 notes View Post

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Will: How do you always know when I’m sad?

Jem: Well, you look sad and you haven’t said anything mean to Gabriel for like 3 hours.

Jem: Oh, and you’re wearing a button that says “I’m sad, ask me why.”

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tsc the infernal devices cassandra clare will herondale the shadowhunter chronicles jem carstairs james carstairs gabriel lightwood clockwork princess heronstairs clockwork prince clockwork angel william herondale tid cassie clare herondale carstairs lightwood tid memes the infernal devices incorrect quotes lightworm ke jian ming tsc incorrect quotes TID The Infernal Devices TID Heronstairs tid incorrect quotes gabriel lightworm male heronstairs tid gang platonic heronstairs

93 notes View Post

lasthourstid

3 years ago

Thomas: What are you doning when you meet someone new?

Alastair: I die

Thomas: ... you can just say hello

Alastair: No, I'm just gonna die

Tags

tsc cordelia carstairs the last hours alastair carstairs the shadowhunter chronicles thomas lightwood chain of iron chain of gold tlh announcement: Alastair is still a mood chog

55 notes View Post

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Lucie: Once, when I was younger, I tried to start a gang.

Jesse: How did it go?

Lucie: It turned into a book club.

Jesse:

Lucie: Actually, it was just Mum, Dad, Jamie and me and Bridget used to make cookies.

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126 notes View Post

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Anna: Yo, is that guy sleeping or dead?

Matthew: Hopefully dead, I hated that guy.

James: Yeah, so did I.

Alastair, laying on the floor: First of all, fuck you all-

Tags

tsc james herondale the last hours alastair carstairs tlh spoilers cassandra clare the shadowhunter chronicles lucie herondale matthew fairchild thomas lightwood christopher lightwood chain of iron chain of gold anna lightwood tlh chain of thorns tlh memes cassie clare the last hours tlh the merry thieves chain of gold incorrect quote chain of gold memes tlh gang jamie herondale

300 notes View Post

lasthourstid

4 years ago

Christopher: I’m scared

Gabriel: Your mom said to go to bed.

Christopher: But there’s a monster under my bed!

Gabriel: Is it scarier than your mom?

Christopher:

Christopher: *goes back to bed*

Tags

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235 notes View Post

lasthourstid

3 years ago

If you ever feel happy, just remember that your favorite character probably hates you and will call you a whiny little bitch for crying over them ;)

Tags

fictional characters tsc probably six of crows shadow and bone soc Don’t get me wrong shadow and bone netflix ya fiction ya fantasy the shadowhuter chronicles but I wouldn't like Kaz if he wasn't a fictional character too lol he's an amazing character and everything but i'd probably ignore him the whole time fictional books

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