Freddie: [is Nagging About Something Roger Did]

Person: I HATE YOU.

Hades: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Person: I HATE YOUR SONS.

Hades: (ง'̀-‘́)ง

Hades: *is drowning in a sea of corgis*

Zeus: HADES!! NO!

Persephone: Don't. This is what he would have wanted.

---

Hades, rubbing a corgi's ears: This is exactly how I want to die!

I saw giant Costco dog plushies the other day and thought about Hades and Persephone 

Headcanons for how each of the Queen boys help Freddie with his panic attacks? From what I've read the poor guy had some bad ones

Brian gets Freddie to lie down on the floor, and then just lies on top of him. For some reason, Freddie finds Brian’s weight, and the feeling of being completely covered by him, calming and grounding instead of restricting. They will lie there like that until Brian is sure that Freddie is all right.

Roger drums on Freddie’s hands. Not literally, of course. He takes Freddie’s hands and lays them on his thighs and then gently taps out rhythms with his fingertips on the back of Freddie’s hands. The rhythms are always soothing. Sometimes he plays their songs, always the calm, quiet ones. Sometimes it’s something new. It gives Freddie something to focus on.

John sings. It takes a lot to get John to sing, but he will always sing for Freddie because he knows it calms the other man down. He will lean against Freddie, mouth to his ear, and sing softly. Sometimes it’s just notes, scales, lyric-less tunes; other times it’s slow, calming versions of their songs (Liar is oddly soothing when sung slow and low); later, their love songs. The repertoire grows larger over the years. Freddie goes limp, slowly, and leans back against John as he sings.

Hades: Dude, chill patience is a virtue

Ares: WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE? WHY CAN’T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?

Theo: hey nice hands

Sept: thanks?

Theo: i bet they'd look better wrapped around my

Abel: wrAPPED AROUND THE BIBLE PRAISE THE LORD AMEN

Genie: I shall grant you three wishes.

Hades: I wish my dog could talk!

Genie: Done!

Hades, patting Cerberus: Hey, buddy, you've got two wishes!

freddie : it’s saint patrick’s day. the holiday of my people.

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀

brian : you’re not Irish.

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀

freddie : binge drinkers.

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀

roger, from across the room : aMEN!

Zeus: Hades, thank you for agreeing to see me.

Hades: I didn't. You just walked in here and started talking.

Hades: Persephone kissed me!!

Zeus: [gasp] No!

Poseidon: [squeals] Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!!

Hades: It’s unbelievable.

Poseidon: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!!

Zeus: Okay okay, we wanna hear everything. Poseidon, get the wine and unplug the phone. Hades, does this end well or do we need tissues?

Hades: Oh it ends verrry well.

Poseidon: [rushing over with wine glasses] Don’t start without me! Don’t start without me!

Zeus: Alright, let’s hear about this kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips, or was it like a, y'know, “I gotta have you now” kinda thing?

Hades: Well, at first it was kinda of intense, y'know and then… oh god, and then we just sorta sunk into it…

Zeus & Poseidon: [squealing] Awwwwwww!

(Scene changes to Persephone, Artemis, and Hecate casually eating pizza)

Persephone: And uh, and then I kissed him.

Artemis: Tongue?

Persephone: Yeah.

Hecate: Cool.