Mermay

Drunk James: and then they…

Drunk Sirius, but not as drunk as James: wait, you wanna say that my godson fucks with my nephew

James:

James: they’ve kissed right in front of me *cries*

Sirius:

Sirius: I always knew that all of Black practice incest

part 1

AU where everything is the same except Andrew has been flirting with Neil from the very beginning but Neil kept misinterpreting it for threats, whereas Andrew kept thinking that Neil was flirting back and not realizing that he’s one wrong move away from getting stabbed in his sleep. this miscommunication isn’t realized until after they hook up for the first time

Neil: does this mean you don’t want to kill me anymore?

Andrew: what do you mean?

Neil: you’ve been threatening to take me out for months

Andrew: I was talking about dinner??? what the fuck???

Neil: wait, no… you also said that you were going to blow my brains out!

Andrew: Neil. Rabbit. Junkie. I did just blow your brains out. I was down there not five minutes ago, remember?

Neil: I don’t believe this. what about that time I took the cigarette out of your mouth to take a drag and you said that if we weren’t in such a public area you’d make me scream?

Andrew: Neil you are so stupid

Neil: fuck. what about that time you said that if I kept running my mouth you’d  find a way to keep me nice and quiet?

Andrew: Neil, you are so stupid

Neil: ohhhh shit. yeah, no, I hear it now. wait, does this mean you’ve liked me all this time?

Andrew: does this mean you were willing to sleep with me even despite thinking I wanted to murder you???

Neil: hey. we all have our issues

Andrew: WHY DID YOU KEEP GOING TO SECLUDED LOCATIONS WITH ME?! you have the worst fucking survival instincts, I swear to fucking god you’re going to give me a stroke one of these days. damn is this how Wymack feels all the time? I should send him a gift card to the cheesecake factory or something

andrew, to neil: stop being so sappy

also andrew, to neil: here are matching armbands <3 also I bought you a phone <3 and even chose you the same song for ringtone <3 i GaVe YoU kEy AnD CalLeD iT hOmE <3 I'd blow you <3 n e i l <3 <3 <3

baby monsters...

headcanon that whenever they have to sleep in a bed that isn't shoved against a wall (usually in hotels during away games), Andrew makes Neil be the big spoon.

He might not always have a wall to guard his back, but at least he has Neil.

Stop helping men. Stop going out of your way to share knowledge with them. Ignore them if you can do so safely. If that’s not possible, shrug your shoulders when you can get away with it. Act dumb. I don’t know how long that’s supposed to cook for. I don’t know what cleaner to use in the tub. I don’t know where Melvin filed the papers for that big project. I don’t know where Kevin went. I don’t know how to get stains out of a shirt. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know.

Stop enabling them. Just stop it. Just stop. If they can weaponize incompetence, so can you.

911 gif meme: [3/3] Families: The Grant/Nash Family: Athena, Bobby, Michael, David, May & Harry

+ Bonus

Hey!

Do you have any fic recs with Andriel in high school? Like not canon comp, just them in high school? That'd be awesome please<3

Of course! Here are a few non canon-comp high school aus :)

Friends to lovers

As long as your next to me (Just the two of us)

sugar and smoke rings

Not Another Highschool AU

Highly Improbable

Who'd You Wanna Kiss?

Aaron and Neil are friends

i'll crawl home to him

i'd cheer for u n me (boom, clap)

Secret or fake dating

The Photo Strip Predicament

In My Defense, I Have None

Somebunny To Love

High School Science series

Stuart adopts Neil

Paper Cut Hearts

growing pains

all I want is what I can't have

i know that we can survive now that we made it and my eyes are filling with salt (oh, this is no one's fault)

slipping by degrees

Free cigarettes

venus as a boy

merman Neil finds a lot of people’s jewellery and always gives them his merman Andrew.

Andrew is always resentful but still wears these jewellery because a) it’s Neil’s gift b) Neil gave this c) it’s none of your fucking business

and he puts on himself these countless necklaces and beads, puts on rings and some strange bracelets. and he absolutely everything changes. one day Andrew wears gaudy yellow beads made of artificial shells with rings with black stones. then he will put on emerald choker and beaded rings. However, there’s a bracelet which Andrew will never remove. smooth pebbles hanging on green algae. they are not as smooth as they were then Neil found them but Andrew doesn’t care. It is unique bracelet. Andrew will put it on until his death. and even after he won’t do it.

I had to do this meme with Andreil...it's a good summary of their relationship in book 3 😂