đđ« đ§·đłïžâđ idk what to write into my desc đ 20/04
198 posts
STOP. POSTING. DOM SUNDAY!!!!! THAT MAN IS A PATHETIC VIRGIN WHO COVERS HIS EYES WITH THE WINGS BEHIND HIS EARS WHEN HE SEES YOU NAKED, HE DOESN'T KNOW WHERE TO PUT HIS HANDS AND HE WHIMPERS LIKE A BITCH
I will NOT fall for ya'lls Dom Sunday propaganda.
self shipping angst is sooo funny. yeah this is my favorite character and romantic partner i love them with my entire heart. im going to make sure i almost die in front of them
The light leaving his eyes completely after Atsushi sacrifices himself Iâm going insane
TW: kinda gory??
Watched Pet Sementary (1989) and decided to bring back my Zombiezai concept and give him a zombie cat :P
Yandere Priest character and art by @meo-eiru. I love that man despite any logic or survival instincts.
There will probably be 2 or 3 chapters total (maybe idk), this chapter is more to set the scene.
Warning : none... For now
Father Micah walks peacefully among the stalls of the market, politely smiling at the passersby greeting him with respect, sometimes even bowing their heads to him a bit.Â
âHello, Father.â They say.Â
Micah pursues his groceries, occasionally caressing the heads of some children running to him in awe, following him around like a celebrity.Â
He is a celebrity here, and Micah is deeply respected in this town. People come to him for his blessing, for his forgiveness, and advice. They come lost and destroyed but after a discussion with him, they leave the monastery rebuilt, new, serene...Â
People look up to him each time they are in trouble and follows blindly his opinion.Â
People were skeptical about this new technology called Phone Marty and some protested the installation of one in the town hall, descending the streets with signs, screaming that this object would bring decadence and destruction to the town. Micah intervened in favor of it and even agreed to put on a show to call the Bishop of the region in front of a public with a smile. He had a small speech arguing that this was the future and the town should follow, that he saw no ill in this piece of technology and the townies had nothing to fear about it.Â
Micah was not in the least surprised of the townies reaction. He chosed this city for a very specific reason after all.Â
The city is isolated between steep mountains and the first train station of the town is very difficult to access and was built 80 years later compared to the rest of the country. This city is like a bubble, blocked in the past and Micah saw an opportunity here.Â
To rule unquestioned on a small bastion.Â
With careful planning and politics, the young Priest carved himself a place in the town and gained immense popularity and influence over the population ruled by old rigid traditions.Â
Micah calculates his move carefully, even going against the Churchâs wishes sometimes to base his power over the entire town. He fought for mandatory vaccines for children, getting vaccinated himself as an example, and helped eradicate the smallpox from the town that took so many lives before. Â
He fought for a mixed school for adolescents, choosing to trust them while their parents thought it would pervert an entire generation and the nation was distrustful of the process. He held the class in an isolated room of the Monastery, welcoming for free any young who trusted the project, allowing the young girls and boys to meet organically while the town slowly lost population due to low birth rates.Â
His project was fruitful. Â
A larger range of young earned their diploma and married soon after with their school sweetheart, bringing new babies to the town. The Mayor who did not believe in his idea and fought against him had to come personally to present his excuses and ask to work together for the betterment of the townÂ
Micah accepted as he won what he wanted.Â
Power.Â
Power to reign supreme over the town.Â
Any new decision needed the young Fatherâs approval, any new Mayor needed his support to win. Micah decided what to do with the town, whom to accept and whom to ban from the town, which new law to install, and which one to repel.Â
Micah could model the town at his will, making it his personal kingdom and Edenâs garden for his personal enjoyment. People believed any word he said and he earned that power. People followed his lead like a dog obeys its Master and he used this power wisely.Â
Micah had everything to be happy.Â
Or what he thought he needed to have to be happy...Â
But as the years passed by, a growing hole appeared in his soul, devouring any sentiment he had in his heart. He felt dissatisfied and like something crucial was missing in his life.Â
Until recently, that is!Â
Until...Â
âFather Micah?â A young womanâs voice pulls him out of his reverie before a stall.Â
âYes young Lady?â He politely smiles at her.Â
She blushes hard and searches for something in her pockets, taking out an envelope that she hands him, the face bright red. He considers it for a second before taking it gently. The envelope smells like rose and lavender.Â
Perfume cost a fortune in this day and age but this young woman still used it on her letter for him.Â
She bows to him, still red, and runs away to a circle of other young women waiting for her in the distance. Surely her group of friends.Â
Micah observes the envelope of a delicate pinkish color.Â
A love letter.Â
Another one.Â
He turns away from the girls and crumples it in his fist, throwing it away as he leaves the Market for the Monastery.Â
He has no use for this love or any love that came before it.Â
Micah crosses the town until a paper pinned on a pole catches his attention. On it, the portrait of a young woman he knows very well is drawn, offering a large sum of money for her capture.Â
âWe still did not catch that witch?â Someone asks behind him.Â
He turns to an old man, taking support on a cane to stand still.Â
âThe sheriff did not warn me that they did at least.â Micah explains, taking the paper in his delicate hand âSo young... Who could have known such a monster was acting among us...âÂ
âThat angel of death! I hope she burns in hell!â The old man spit on the ground.Â
âThis is a terrible thought, sir. Such desire could bring you down with her, be careful.â He warns.Â
The old man sniffs, but ultimately nods.Â
âDid we find new victims?â He asks.Â
âI cannot reveal such information, sir. The Sheriff trusts me with it.â Micah retorts gently Â
âYou are the light of this town, Father. You should not let us in the dark like that, if even you start having secrets we are done for. Surely you know something!â The old man begs.Â
Micah pretends to look around them before leaning to the ear of the old man and starts whipsering.Â
âWe think a recent death in the Monastery hospital might be due to poisoning...âÂ
âHell! She found her way in the Monastery hopsital?! This witch has no limits! She deconsecrates the church and the souls of the victims!â The old man rages.Â
Micah presses his finger on his lips.Â
âOf course, this info is strictly confidential for the investigation. I would not want it to spread in the town and cause a mass hysteria, can I trust you?âÂ
The old manâs eyes start glimming mischeviously.Â
âI will be as mute as a tomb, Father.âÂ
âGood. Go now, I must prepare for the Mass tonight.â Micah politely enjoins.Â
âOf course father. Another mass to pray for her victimsâ souls?âÂ
âI will hold as much as it is needed. Until we capture and judge her for her deed.âÂ
The old man nod and walk away.Â
Micah smiles to himself.Â
The old man lost three grandkids to that woman and his hate for her is deep.Â
His hate for you...Â
Of course, he is going to spread the word to the town, enraging the spirits even more, starting a new witch hunt in the Mountains and the forests nearby.Â
Micah tears your poster off the pole and walks to the Monastery. He crosses it to gain his apartment, a small house in the garden of the Monastery, isolated and peaceful.Â
His castle in his kingdom.Â
He opens the door and locks it behind him immediately.Â
âRosebud? (Y/n)? I am home.â He announces.Â
You open a door and come running into his arms, pressing you against his taller frame.Â
âFather Micah...!âÂ
âDid anyone see you?â He investigate.Â
âNo! I remained hidden like you ordered me to.âÂ
âGood. You must not leave this house under any pretenses, you are not safe outside.âÂ
You part from him, sighing.Â
âI know Father, I know... Did you talk to the Sheriff?âÂ
âHe is busy with a new case, unfortunately.â He explains, putting down the groceries on the table, âI will plead your case do not worry. But the spirits are boiling and vengeful, a new victim has been discovered.âÂ
âI did not kill them! I did not kill anyone! You know that, Micah, donât you?!â You beg with eyes wet with tears threatening to spill.Â
âI believe you, (Y/n). I do. But you know how the town is, you know how they think. It will be hard to clear your name of any suspicion.âÂ
You lower your head defeated.Â
âI see...âÂ
âI am with you in this trial, my child.â He takes your shoulder in his hand to squeeze it gently, a reassuring smile on his face.Â
âI know... Thank God at least you believe me... If you did not, I do not know what I would have done...â You sob, âI would be lost forever...âÂ
âDry your tears, my darling. I am working on it, do not fret.â He promises, pulling you to him to die his nose in your hair.Â
You smell delectable, just as he loves.Â
You press your feminine curves against his body in a desperate search for support, wiping a tear away.Â
Micah smiles to himself again.Â
Poor little lamb... So lost and fragile.Â
So adorableÂ
So intoxicatingÂ
His darlingÂ
His rosebud.Â
His...Â
He cups your cheek to make you look at him.Â
âCome on now. I must prepare for the evening Mass, do you need anything?âÂ
âWill you be gone for long?â You grab his hand desperately.Â
âNo. 2 hours at most, as always.âÂ
âCome back to me soon...â You beg, âI feel so alone in here.âÂ
âI promise, my darling.â And he kisses your forehead tenderly.Â
Not your lips.Â
Not yet...Â
This is for laterÂ
For when you will totally be at his mercy, under his power.Â
Then he will break his vows and delight himself of your soul and body.Â
He will eat you upÂ
Devour you until you beg for his mercyÂ
And maybe he will stopÂ
Or maybe notÂ
He is a capricious man and he is demanding.Â
You did not know what kind of hell you entered when you got down that wagon train, when you entered that secluded town as an outsider...Â
But you are Micahâs hellÂ
His obsessionÂ
His rosebudÂ
His darlingÂ
He will have you, wether you like it or notÂ
After all he reigns supreme.Â
And unquestioned.Â
Your honor, he's perfect đ«Ąđ
please I love him sm đ
gOD it's so good to see dazai in something other than that fucking prison onesie finally <(ïżŁ ïč ïżŁ)> even if he is just a hallucination
i was talking fem dazai hcs w a mutual on twitter
22 yr old man who doesnât pay his taxes claims to be snow white
Secretly married sskk pre canon would be hilarious just completely re-contextualize their âfightsâ and ârivalryâ to Akutgawa just wanting his husband to stop doing obvi dangerous shit and getting kidnapped (he is a hypocrite) Atsushi didnât know Akutgawa was apart of the mob until after he got a job at the ada bc he thought he was joking (bc who tf names their mob the Mob) they got married after knowing each other for three months and met because Akutgawa hit him with his car
They have healthiest relationship out of all of the bsd cast
Since Atsushi is making up this Dazai and his knowledge is all only things he knows himself means that Atsushi's the one thinking it-
Hello! First, I really love your AU (I keep forgetting what they're called v":), they are great and really funny âšïžđž
May I offer an idea? What about when they called their full government name?
(Asà como cuando una madre Latina grita el nombre del hijo cuando estå enojada XD Perdonar, no supe como expresar esto en inglés correctamente xD)
synopsis: texting the cod guys their full name
à©â©â§âË price, gaz, ghost, soap, alejandro, rudy, graves, makarov, keegan, nikolai
cw: none
an: had to invent a last name for nikolai because he doesnât have one for some reason?? anyways, iâm not super confident in how iâm writing keegan and nikolai but fuck it, we ball
masterlist
dividers from @/saradika-graphics :)
a/n: sorry I haven't been posting! school starts on tuesday and i am not prepared to deal w these shitheads đ€§ (update, its friday and they are no new fine boys đđ)
to all my dazai fans đ«¶đ«¶ also im working on a 15! chuuya x reader oneshot atm too!
also @sosograndii who wanted a dazai fic đ also lmk if any of you want a platonic! fem! reader x pm! dazai where its like "when I say I like all women you might actually be the exception" bc that would be hella funny
content: being teenagers, oneshot, swearing, mentions of suicide, injuries, dazai being dazai, reader is lowkey suicidal too, Mori is kinda creepy beware đš
"Mori?"
"Yes, Dazai?"
The brunette adjusted his white cast, scribbling doodles on the supposed paperwork he was supposed to do. He currently sat across from the Port Mafia boss, Mori Ougai, who was folding Elise's clothes attentively in his leather seat. Dazai shifted and set down the chipped pencil he usually chewed on, facing him properly.
"Do you think there is anyone else in the mafia who rivals my skills?" The Demon Prodigy asks, it may seem like an arrogant or overconfident question, but the boy has been used to being a genius at such a young age; it was rather a question out of genuine curiousity.
"Besides me?" Mori 'charms' with a smile, not so charmingly earning a scowl from Dazai in return. "Yes, besides you." He grumbles begrudgingly, slumping in his seat thinking what to draw next. "No, not at all." The mafia boss states with full confidence, "You are my pupil, afterall." Dazai groans again, dropping the pencil yet again before yawning. "Not every intelligent person is of your work, Mori." He retorts with a bored face, causing the grown man to exhale loudly. "Fine. I suppose there is one person who may be up to your level."
Dazai's ears perked up, turning to Mori interested. "Who?" The man in the white lab coat adjusted his purple tie, fluttering his eyes shut mindlessly. "A girl your age, she wants to be a doctor just like her Boss." He smiles genuinely, causing Dazai to sigh in irritation.
"Yuck."
Yuck.
Is what you thought as you stare at the lanky boy who rested on your procedure chair. He was battered and bruised, previous bandages and a large cast wrapped around his left arm stained with sweat and blood; you put on a pair of gloves before grabbing a few tools to clean him up. He was a boy about your age, or so you thought, he was tall and lanky, a black suit with an oversized black overcoat messily draped upon his shoulders. He had messy brown hair thst framed his face, one eye wrapped around bandages along his face; shame, his eyes were a pretty sight.
"Where is your boss?" The brunette asks, watching you attentively as you grab his hand and begin to wipe his beaten knuckles, pushing the bandages wrapped around his hands up. "Out. I'm supposed to take over Mori's job while he's gone." You inform, scooting your chair closer in order to clean all the gashes on his hand. "Oh. So you're that girl?" You cock a brow, turning to look at him.
"That girl?"
"Mori's pupil."
You finish wiping one of his knuckles and dispose of the cloth, motioning the boy to remove his arm bandages before the cut bleeds again. "Oh. I guess." You quip, causing him to tilt his head in interest. "What's your name?" The brunette asks, complying and removing his stained arm bandage, placing it gently on the chair; you picked it up and disposed it yet again, grabbing disinfectant wipes as you wipe his knuckles once more. "[Y/N] [L/N], you?"
"Dazai Osamu, I'm fifteen." You nod politely, wrapping a new set of bandages around his hand. "Cool, me too." Dazai's eyes light up a bit at your responses, "I know." he nods, extending his other hand to repeat the same process.
"So," you pause, carefully applying the new bandages on his other hand, they were quite cold to the touch. "what happened to you?" Dazai sighs, tapping a nimble finger on the hospital chair. "I was trying to kill myself," Your eyes widen a bit at the honesty, giving a casual nod as if it were an everyday occurrence. "However, I didn't know that there were a few men who held grudges against me at the end of the river, so I had to take care of that." He answers, you gave a listening hum at his story.
"That's interesting." You reply, causing him to raise his brows a bit; looking at you as you get up and lift his messy bangs, urging him to take off his facial bandages. "Yep, I'm assuming you get a lot of cases like me?" You wipe his bleeding forehead, causing him to pinch a brown eye shut, "Not exactly; but I mean, I understand you."
Dazai tilted his head in confusion, crimson blood collecting on the abrasion on his forehead; he seemed rather amused yet surprised. "You do?" the boy asks, you nod your head in response, finishing cleaning the wound. "Elaborate, please." he requests, his brown eyes almost sparkled into yours. As if you two weren't terrifying mafia members, as if the world just for a second; stopped to understand a few dumb teenagers in weird situations.
"Who wants to live in this world anyway?" You ask rhetorically, chuckling a bit as you grab a few bandages and carefully guide them around the side of his face. The brunette for a second, was caught off guard; no one underestimated the Demon Prodigy, the greatest mistake for Dazai's enemies is that, they're Dazai's enemies, no? But, this time it was different, just one sentence and accomodating gesture, and he felt a knot tighten in his stomach. Weridly enough, Dazai hummed in satisfaction and fluttered his eyes shut.
"I see." He replies, you finished wrapping the bandage around his head and take off your gloves, feeling satisfied with the mutual agreement. "[Y/N], right?" the brunette asks casually, causing you to nod your head in agreement. "Yeah."
"Would you like to elope out of the mafia with m-"
Dazai Osamu, that fucking womanizer.
bsd 118 spoilers
LICY KYOUKA LICYHSJAJCNHIEJENJDJNSX LUCJY KYOUKA. THYERE TSLKIJG. THEYRE IN ANNEâS ROOM TOGETHER. DNUSJSJBDJHDJHHJEDHJSWJNSWJNSDHJEDHJEWHJJSWNJHSSHJWDJHWEHJ I MISSED RHEM SO BAD.
ᥣđ© BIRDS OF A FEATHER (WE SHOULD STICK TOGETHER)
FEATURING: dazai osamu
SUMMARY: you're called back to yokohama when the president of the agency and the boss of the port mafia are infected by the same ability. you know that the situation is complicated, but you don't realize just how bad it is for you until you're sitting face-to-face with dazai on the opposing side for the first time.
wordcount: 8.7k; sfw; fem!reader, pm!reader, mentions of mafia business (pmreader doing pm business!!), light angst with happy ending,
AUTHOR'S NOTES: happy friday :') i hope u guys enjoy
You should have known better than to think your trip back to Europe would be uneventful. Youâd hardly been away for a month, working with Tolstoy and the Three Deaths to figure out what exactly Fyodor Dostoevsky might be planning in Yokohama. The man is frustratingly good at covering his tracks, even Tolstoyâs best have been having trouble picking up his trail. Youâd begun to make some progress in Rome when you got the 119 text from Chuuya, forcing you to drop what you were doing to get on the jet back to Japan.
âAre you on the way back yet?â
The urgency in Chuuyaâs voice on the call only serves to stress you out more. Your eyes slide shut as you lean against your chair, ignoring your subordinateâs curious eyes as you reply with a short: âYes, Chuuya. You sent a 119. Of course, I am on the way back, are you going to tell me whatâs going on?â
âYouâre not going to like it,â Chuuya says tightly. âI was going to wait until you got here.â
âObviously, I am not going to like it,â you reply. âI cannot imagine why I would ever like a 119.â
âYouâre really not going to like it,â Chuuya stresses and you canât help but sigh, bracing yourself for whatever heâs about to say. âThe Boss is dying.â
âWhat?â
Youâre on your feet in an instant, eyes wide and phone pressed to your ear as your heart comes to a painful stop in your chest. Klaus straightens where heâs sitting, the curious expression quickly shifting into concern and confusion. You know the kid is itching to ask whatâs going on, but you can hardly think straight with the sudden news. Fear begins to claw at your chestâa dangerous, dangerous emotion that threatens to shut down your mind. You know you have to get it under control before it can but your tongue feels swollen and heavy and your mind has become a jumble of thoughts that you canât decipher.
That canât be possible. It canât. Mori dying? The thought itself is so ludicrous that it almost makes you laugh but you know Chuuya would never joke about this.Â
âHe and the President of the Agency were attacked by an ability user that can infect people with diseases. One has to die or both will. Unless we kill the President in the next thirty-six hours, the Boss will die.â
âPushkin,â you spit out angrily. âThat nasty roach. Iâve met him before. You called me right when it happened?â
âYep,â Chuuya says, anxiety thinly veiled in his tone. âWe just launched an assault on the Agency-â
âDumbass,â you seethe, cutting him off. âI canât stand you sometimes. Now weâll have to track them down. Iâll be there in less than an hour, donât do anything else stupid.â
You hang up the phone without another word.
âWhatâs going on?â Klaus calls after you curiously, but youâre already making your way to the front of the plane, pushing the cockpit door open to get the attention of the pilot.
âFly faster.â
Dazai sighs as he rests against the pillows of the hospital bed, trying to figure out how exactly heâs going to convince the nurses to let him have his phone. His gaze drifts from his bedsheets to the window, following a bird soar past the glass into the sky as his mind races to piece together Fyodorâs plans.
By now, Fukuzawa should be safe within Lucy Montogomeryâs interdimensional space; itâs only a matter of whether or not Tanizaki will be able to pull off the assassination on Mori. Dazai thinks the chances are slimâeven if he does manage to get past the Black Lizards, Kouyou will be guarding Mori personally and Golden Demon will be able to sense Tanizaki through the illusion. Heâll be okay though, Dazai has Kyouka on standby as the one thatâs going to extract him from the base and Kouyou will hesitate at the sight of her. He just needs to figure out a new approach. One that will be more successful.
What to do next?
For the first time in years, Dazai well and truly struggles to formulate a plan. Heâs always struggled with the concept of failure and it haunts him now like an oppressive shadow hanging over his shoulders, knowing that the one man who had brought him in without hesitation, accepted him into the light with open arms despite his gruesome past, will be facing the consequences of his incapability this time.
Shit.
Despite the copious amount of pain relievers heâs on, Dazai can feel a headache coming on from the stress of this situation and Fyodor Dostoevsky. Heâs never had an opponent like this beforeâone who can match him move for move on the chessboard, see through all of his plans, and it scares Dazai because he knows this is only the beginning and if heâs struggling nowâŠ
Dazai is drawn out of his thoughts as the door to his hospital room opensâhe lifts his head, preparing round two of trying to convince the nurse to give him his phone, only to freeze when heâs met with an achingly familiar sight.
Your lips are curved up into a coy smile, his phone dangles tauntingly between your fingers. You look beautifulâalways doâand Dazaiâs chest flutters at the sight of you, drinking in your pretty face and basking in the warmth he only ever feels in your presence. For a second, all of Dazaiâs fears are washed away because thereâs nothing that he canât handle with you at his side.Â
For a second, because then Dazai remembers that youâre not at his side anymore.
Youâre the enemy.
âLong time, no see,â you drawl, making your way forward to take a seat on the edge of his hospital bed. âYou look like shit.â
Dazai sighs heavily, the smile on his lips becoming a bit more tired as he reaches out for your hand, fingers brushing over your palm before he laces them with yours. âMy sweet hime, youâre always a sight for sore eyes, but I canât help but feel dismayed by you being back in Yokohama now.â
You being back in Yokohama makes things even more difficult for the situation at hand. Chuuya and Kouyou, Dazai couldâve outsmarted themâit wouldâve been difficult with how well Chuuya knows Dazai and all of his schemes, but it wouldâve been doable, if only because the man is easy enough to antagonize. But you? You wonât fall for any of Dazaiâs tricks and youâll make sure Chuuya doesnât either.Â
Things just got much more complicatedâhe really didnât expect them to be so quick to call you back. You and Dostoevsky at the same time, two opponents who can match him more for move when he was at the top of his game, which heâs not at with his head all fogged up with painkillers⊠it didnât bode well for him or the people relying on him.
His throat tightens when you lift his hand to brush your lips against his knuckles, having to close his eyes to hide the way they mist over because of the casual intimacy that heâs only shown by you. Your fingers tighten around his as you drop your joined hands back into your lap, an unreadable expression on your face as you look at him.
âIâm so mad at you.â You smile at him but Dazai can see the way you swallow thickly, desperately trying to contain your emotions. âTo walk into such an obvious trap set by Dostoevsky⊠To think you would try to leave me behind again so soon after our reunion. Are you so eager to rid yourself of me?â
âNever,â Dazai says hoarsely. âI knew he wouldnât-â
âYou donât know anything about Fyodor Dostoevsky, Dazai.â You interrupt him, grip on his hand almost becoming painful as you glare at him. âI donât know anything about him and I spent many months with him. How could you be so reckless?âÂ
Dazai was not aware that you spent many months with Fyodor Dostoevsky but thatâs a conversation for another time. He feels distinctly scolded as he looks away from you petulantly. âI had to-â
You reach forward with your free hand to grab his chin, forcing him to look at you, and all of the fight leaves Dazaiâs body as soon as you touch his face. His lashes flutter as he instinctively leans into your touch and his throat bobs when your grip on his chin shifts into you cupping his cheek, fingers carding through the edges of his dark hair. He lets his eyes slide back open after letting himself enjoy your touch for a few moments.
âYou have to be more careful,â you say quietly.Â
Dazai has become so entirely unused to people showing him such blatant concern that he almost canât hide the way his eyes become wet. Of course, the members of the Agency care for him, he knows that in his heart even if itâs hard for him to come to terms with, but they do it so in a more subtle manner. They casually check in on him on his bad days, bring him food and try to get him out of his dorm when he can hardly drag himself out of bed, they know he doesnât like it when they point out when heâs doing bad, so theyâre more cunning with how they show their concern⊠but the way you look at him⊠the way you touch himâŠÂ
Back in the Mafia, on his bad days even before the two of you had acknowledged how you felt for one another, youâd always sit with him and made sure he was eating. Always made sure he knew he wasnât alone even when he did his damned best to push you away. After the two of you had acknowledged your feelings for one another, youâd let him curl in your bed and surround himself with your blankets and clothes. Youâd never push him, would always be there when he needed itâheâd taken it for granted back then, because his bad days after he left the Mafia⊠after he left you⊠Dazai almost couldnât force himself through them.
But itâs different now after going four years without it; it feels⊠more intense. He thinks maybe it's because heâs still convinced that youâre going to change your mind and spurn him, toss him aside the same way he did to you four years ago.
He doesnât deserve this, he thinks, not for the first time since heâs reunited with you, and he wants to know why. Doesnât know why you let him come back to you when he decidedly doesnât deserve it. If this is just some big cruel joke youâre playing on him. He doesnât understand any of this. He feels like heâs eighteen again, so scared of a relationship with you that heâd rather avoid you at any given chance.Â
After what feels like an eternity, your hand drops from his face and you lean back on the bed, concerned expression disappearing as you level a steady look onto him.
âNow, to talk business.â You smile and Dazai feels cold without your touch, pouting when his hand falls limp against the hospital bed. âWhat is it now? Thirty hours before the virus takes hold and they both die?â
âHa!â Dazai barks out a laugh that makes him wince. âI know better than to sit on the opposite side of the negotiation table with you. Nice try.â
You give him a simpering smile. âCome, Dazai, my ability doesnât work on you. Weâre on even ground.â
âYou donât need your ability to win a negotiation,â he scoffs, but thereâs a smile on his lips. âAnyway, I canât negotiate on behalf of the Agency. Youâll have to find Kunikida-kun for that.â
âThere is no winning negotiations, only-â
âOnly a coming to terms, blah blah blah,â Dazai finishes for you, rolling his eyes. âIâm not negotiating with you.â
âI fear that you are going to be negotiating with me, Dazai.â You give him a sweet smile that instantly puts him on edge, folding your hands over your lap as you cross one leg over the other. âMy subordinate is currently in the apartment of Haruno Kirako with her and Tanizaki Naomi. Heâs waiting on orders for me to either leave or kill them. Said orders will be dependent on whether or not weâre able to come to an understanding.â
Dazaiâs heart drops to his stomach, taking in a sharp breath and glancing down to his phone where itâs resting on your lap, wondering if he could snatch it and get out a SOS to the other members of the Agency before you can take it away. Your smile becomes more mocking as you toss it across the room to the couch on the opposite wall, keeping it far out of reach.Â
âGod, youâre still a cold-hearted bitch,â Dazai breathes out, tilting his head back against the wall with a heavy breath. âThis isnât a negotiation, this is a ransom.â
You wave your hand dismissively. âClose enough.â
Dazai gapes. âClose enough?â
âClose enough,â you affirm.
âWhat do you want?â Dazai finally asks, lips a bit twisted as he waits for your response. His fingers thrum against his thigh, mind racing as he tries to figure out what you could possibly want. Well, he knows what you wantâyouâll want Fukuzawa dead to ensure Mori lives but Dazai canât let that happen.
âKunikida Doppoâyou say heâs the acting President while Fukuzawa-dono is incapacitated?â you ask him absently, tilting your head to the side. He nods and you hum. âSet up a meeting between him and I.â
Dazaiâs eyes narrow. âIâll set up a meeting if you get your dog away from our office workers,â he counters, knowing that itâs not going to be that easy with you but he may as well try.
âYouâre in no position to be making demands, Dazai,â you remind. âWhy should I?â
âIâm not setting up a meeting between the two of you if youâre going to go into it with leverage over him already,â Dazai says firmly. âIf youâre so set on trying to solve this through negotiation, youâll have to give up the upper hand and meet them on even grounds.â
You stare at him for a moment, eyes too sharp and calculating for his liking. Dazai thinks that itâs entirely unfair that he has to deal with you when heâs still doped up on painkillers, but he doubts you care.
âFine,â you finally agree, pulling out your phone and shooting a text to someone. You frown down at it for a moment before looking back up at him. âItâs done. Set up the meeting.â
Dazai has half a mind to say no. He knows that sending Kunikida to the negotiation table with you is going to be a mistakeâyouâre too sharp and too convincingâhe isnât sure if Kunikidaâs ideals will be able to hold strong over your silver tongue. You can clearly tell that heâs considering reneging on his promise from how your eyes narrow.
You rise to your feet without another word, giving him a cool look. âIâll be waiting for you at the teahouse in Nishi-ku that we-that the Port Mafia owns. If you havenât arrived by the twenty-six hour mark...â
Dazai sighs your name, long and drawn out, his eyes feel heavy as he looks up at you. You pause, gaze softening for a moment as you reach out and grab his hand, squeezing it gently.
âWhen this is all done and over with, come by my place,â you say quietly. âIâll have to head back to Europe soon after. I talked to the nurses, they wonât bother you when you try to leave.â
âYeah,â Dazai says, voice a bit more hoarse than he intended for it to be. âYeah, Iâll come over.â
You donât say anything else, casting one last lingering look over where heâs laying on the hospital bed before turning and walking out the way you came. Dazai sighs again, slumping back against his pillows as he stares up at the ceiling, somehow feeling even worse than he did before you showed up.
Your car pulls up to the teahouse thirty seconds past the twenty-six hour mark.
âYou ready?â Tachihara Michizou looks over the front seat back to where youâre sitting. Akutagawa Gin sits in the passenger seat, gray eyes curious as she looks back at you. âWe could always yâknow⊠just go in there andâŠâ
He lifts his hand to make a finger gun, âpulling the triggerâ several times before giving you a pointed look. Gin rolls her eyes and raises her eyebrows, waiting for your response. You hadnât even wanted to bring people with you, but Chuuya insisted on itâhe wanted to come himself, but you felt more comfortable with him staying back at headquarters as extra protection for Mori.
âYes, Iâm ready,â you say dryly, not even bothering to acknowledge the second part of what he said.
You have yet to even see Mori despite Kouyouâs insistence that you go to him. You donât want to see himâyou heard enough from Chuuya to know that his condition is bad and you have no interest in seeing him while heâs in such a sorry state. The thought makes your heart twist uncomfortably and you canât afford to be emotional right now.Â
Youâve spent the past four hours trying to plan out what youâll do if you canât come to terms with Kunikida and the Armed Detective Agency. The best course of action would have been to have Akutagawa, Klaus and the rest of the Black Lizards positioned around the building for a quick execution once the negotiations fall through butâŠ
But you didnât do that.
Your eyes flicker over to where Dazai is waiting for you outside of the teahouse; heâs leaning against the wall tapping away at his phone. Heâs dressed in that same ugly outfit he wore the last time you were back in Yokohamaâthe long tan jacket and the bolo tie over his shirt. He probably shouldnât be up and about already, you can tell heâs still hurt from the way heâs leaning on one side more than the other, but a distinct fondness bubbles in your chest at the sight of him.
Instantly, you push it away, throat tightening because you know you canât be letting your emotions get the best of you. You canât go easy on the Armed Detective Agency just because Dazai is with them now; you need to do whatâs best for the Mafia.
But you donât like this. You donât like that Dazai is the enemy now. You spent years working alongside him, friends with him (more than friends), living with him. Youâd known that things would be different between the two of you after you spent that night with him in your apartment a few weeks ago⊠you just didnât think youâd be forced to confront it so soon.Â
Tachihara steps out of the car first and you watch as Dazai lifts his head, squinting at the sight of the boy. Tachihara makes his way to your door and opens it for you, keeping one hand ready on the grip of his gun as you step out of the car. Dazaiâs expression shifts as soon as youâre in his line of view, softening just enough for it to be noticeable to you. Tachihara and Gin trail a few steps behind you as you make your way over to him, he doesnât speak up until youâre a few steps away.Â
âYouâre late,â Dazai sings and you can tell that even though his lips curl up into a small smile at the sight of you, heâs not happy to see you. Not because of you, but because of what your presence means. He holds out his hand to youâTachihara and Gin are instantly stepping forward between the two of you, which Dazai evidently does not like considering the way his expression instantly darkens, only lightening a bit when you wave them off. You purse your lips as you stare at his hand for a moment. âI canât let you go in there with your ability active.â
âI donât need my ability against your people,â you say coolly but you place your hand in his anyway.Â
Itâs not the first time you and Dazai have held hands but it certainly feels like itâthe calluses on his hand from firearm use are gone so his skin is softer now and it feels almost⊠unfamiliar.
Dazai has never felt unfamiliar before.
Dazai laces his fingers with yours, holding your hand tightly. Your hands donât fit right together anymoreâit feels awkwardâand you wonder if itâs just in your imagination or if he feels it too. He squeezes your hand a bit harder as if trying to force them to fit together, so you think he might and that makes your heart sink a little.Â
He looks down at you and you think heâs going to say something, but instead his lips only tighten and his brows furrow as he looks away. You bite back a sigh, wanting to say something yourself but not even sure what would be suitable for this situation.
âDazai,â you say quietly before the two of you head into the teahouse and thereâs an unreadable expression on his face as he waits for you to say something else, but you remember that Tachihara and Gin are not a foot behind you, so you just shake your head. âNevermind. Letâs get this over with.â
Dazai looks disappointed but not surprised. He doesnât say anything else as he pushes open the door to the teahouse. The air is brisk and familiar, and with Dazai at your side, you can almost imagine that Chuuya is on your other, that the two of them are escorting you to a negotiation meeting with one of the big Yakuza syndicates the Port Mafia has been at odds with.Â
But instead of an oyabun and his advisor sitting at the table in the private room at the back of the teahouse, itâs two members of the Armed Detective Agency. And instead of Dazai taking a seat next to you, he sits at the head of the table as the pseudo-host of the meeting, the one who set it up and knows both sides⊠but he makes his preferences clear in the way he looks at his fellow detectives, waiting for them to give the first words of the negotiation, a tactical advantage.Â
Even with Tachihara and Gin lingering right behind you, you feel alone.Â
You almost wish youâd agreed to let Chuuya come with youâheâs familiar, the one person in this world youâve been able to rely on without having to fear the rug being pulled out from under you. You always feel more confident when heâs at your side, but you needed him to stay with Mori, to hold down the headquarters just on the off-chance the Agency pulled something while you were busy with negotiations.Â
So instead, you brave this as you are, squaring your shoulders and raising your chin. Youâre not worried about this meeting, you know one way or another, youâll come out on top against the Agency, but you find yourself more unsettled than you thought you would be due to the lack of familiarity between you and Dazai⊠and far more disconcerted at the realization that Dazai is an enemy now.Â
Since heâs the host, you should be respecting Dazaiâs decision of giving the detectives the first words of the negotiation, but you find yourself smiling lightly and tilting your head to the side before speaking. Petty, maybe, and disrespectful, surely, but you canât bring yourself to care.
âYou must be Kunikida-san, I want to say that itâs nice to finally meet you butâŠâ you say lightly. You squint and then add, âI canât help but feel that youâre familiar somehow. Have we met before?â
Dazai gives you a sharp look when you speak upâdeserved, but you still give him an equally sharp look back. He canât expect you to go easy on the detectives just because heâs standing with them now, but it⊠makes you feel weird. You think again how much you donât like this; you donât like being on the opposite side of Dazai, and you especially donât like the fact that there is a creeping fear that this might create a rift between the two of you.
What did he think would happen? You want to spit at him. He chose to leave the Port Mafia. Chose to leave you. Chose to join up with the enemy. This is on him, heâs the one who changed, you havenât. He knew what he was getting into by bringing his new friends to the negotiation table with you, heâs been on the right side of it with you countless times before, so he knows what youâre like at the table.Â
Shit.Â
âYouâre that girl,â Kunikida suddenly realizes, squinting. âYou came by Grannyâs apartment during that gang conflict six years ago. You⊠you were with the Port Mafia back then? The father you were trying to get to-â
âYes, that was me,â you agree, remembering just where youâd seen him before, eyes gliding over the blonde man curiously. Heâs a far cry from the scrawny teenager youâd met a few years ago, nervous and bumbling to write down everything his grandmother says. âHow is she?â
Kunikidaâs lips twist. âShe passed away two years ago. A stroke.â
âSorry to hear that,â you say genuinely, frowning, before letting your gaze drift over to the last person in the room. The smile on your lips becomes a bit cooler. âAkiko-chan, itâs been a while. I donât think Iâve seen you since you left Tokoyami.â
Thereâs an indecipherable expression on Yosanoâs face as she stares at you, and you canât help the way your lips twist in irritation. You knew there was a chance that she would show up with Kunikida, but youâd been hoping that she wouldnât. You canât let it rattle you, but no one gets under your skin like she doesâyou think thatâs probably why she showed, to throw you off your game and make things easier on her coworker.
Sheâll find herself sorely mistaken.
The way she says your name grates your nervesâitâs solemn, almost, a hint of remorse that makes your skin crawl. She looks like she wants to say something more than what she actually does, but she settles with, âYou look good, better than the last time I saw you. Itâs good seeing you again.â
She sounds genuineâthat only pisses you off more.Â
So your smile tightens as you say, âI look better? The last time I saw you, you were having a mental breakdown and nearly blew all of us up on the Ritter.â
Yosano physically cringes as she averts her gaze, and you turn your attention back to Kunikida and say, âLetâs get down to business, yeah?â
Kunikida sighs. He doesnât look confident which is a mistake on his part, Dazai can tell too from the way his lips tightens just a bit. You give Dazai a look from the corner of your eye.
You should have prepped your people better.
Dazai gives you a sharp look right back, his fingers tighten around your hand. You ignore it. You hope you donât look as bothered as it makes you feel, nowâs not the time to show any weakness, especially to someone like Dazai. Especially when heâs not an ally.Â
Shit, you think again, this time a bit more distressed. You swallow your discomfort and think again: what did he expect from this? Itâs only a shallow consolation this time. You push on when Kunikida starts talking.
âI donât see how we have anything to talk about,â Kunikida says, clearing his throat. âThereâs nothing you can say that can bring us to an agreement under these circumstances.â
Alright, business time. This you can do.Â
You just have to ignore the weight of Dazaiâs hand on your own.Â
âYou are looking at this situation from the perspective of an employee who cares for Fukuzawa-dono,â you say, leaning back in your seat and folding your hands over the table. Dazaiâs hand drops to the table and he shifts to hold your wrist, giving you a side-eye as if warning you not to slip from his grasp. You ignore it. âI empathize with your predicament. I do. But we canât let our emotions rule us when the fate of the entire city is dependent on how this conflict is resolved.â
Kunikida is stiff on the opposite side of the table as soon as you start speaking, clearly uncomfortable with this whole meeting. Yosano holds her chin high as she stares down at you and you only raise your eyebrows at her before turning your attention back to the blonde.
âYou have been named the interim director of the Armed Detective Agency, and from what Iâve heard, Fukuzawa-dono intends to name you President once he inevitably retires,â you say, tilting your head to the side as you observe Kunikida. âIâve met the man often enough to know that he wouldnât allow a man whoâs rash and emotional to lead his organization. Neither you nor I want this to escalate to open conflict. There will be too many casualties on both sides.â
âHm,â Kunikida says, pushing back his glasses as he considers his words. âAnd yet, we have a way around casualties on our end, thanks to one of our ownâYosano-sensei. The Port Mafia does not have any such means.â
Yosano stiffens when she sees the smile that curves at the corners of your lips.
âYour second attempt at an immortal regiment, Akiko-chan, I hope this one fares better than your last,â you comment with an easy smile before focusing your attention back on Kunikida, watching as the man casts a curious look between you and Yosano. You wonder how much she told the Agency of your shared pastâseemingly very little. âI fear that even if your doctor is able to continuously heal all members of the Agencyâassuming youâre never separated, which is unlikelyârepetitive death breaks the human mind. How many times will she heal you and your other detectives before your minds start to fray? Iâd wager the weretigerâs mind will break firstâafter the fourth resurrection, between dying over and over again and watching his friends die⊠from what I hear, the boy is quite the gentle soul with a fragile mind. Heâll try to stay strong for your sake, but itâll be too much for him.â
You feel Dazaiâs fingers tighten on your hand in warning, clearly not appreciating the way youâre talking about his new protege and to his friends. You ignore him, but itâs harder than you expect. You donât like this. You donât, even with you telling yourself that this is his fault, you still find yourself bothered by it all. It hurts being at odds with Dazai like this, in a way that you never imagined you would be; heâs supposed to come to your apartment after this, but you donât even know if heâll show.Â
You donât know if youâll be able to look him in the eye if he does.Â
God, and that thought only pisses you off more, because you shouldnât be feeling guilty over this. Not when Dazai knew what he was getting into. Not when it was Dazaiâs choice to leave the Port Mafia and join the enemy. Youâre doing what youâve always done, and youâve never felt guilty for it before, and you shouldnât now. Not because of him.Â
âOur numbers overwhelm yours by a long shot. In a war of attrition, weâll win. Your minds will break long before we run out of bodies to throw at you,â you finish, a bit more coldly than youâd begun. âThereâs no scenario where you enter an open conflict with the Port Mafia and win.â
Yosano and Kunikida share a look with one another and you watch as Kunikida sighs before pressing his lips together, gaze hardening on you. âSo, what do you propose? Do you just want us to hand over the President on a silver platter? Because thatâs not happening.â
Phase Two.
You went into this knowing that you wouldnât likely be able to sway Kunikidaâs mind on handing Fukuzawa over to be executed, but that was never your intention to begin with. You just needed the chance to plant the seeds of doubt, to make him question himself so he can make a mistake that you can capitalize on.
Dazai realizes this from the way he stiffens, and you know he canât be happy.
You donât care.
You donât.
âI want you to approach this how Fukuzawa-dono would as his stand-in,â you say. You itch to look at Dazai, want to know whatâs running through his head right now. You donât. âWhat do you know of the Port Mafia, Kunikida-san?â
âWhat kind of question is that?â Kunikida frowns, looking thoroughly displeased, but youâre unperturbed.
âMany people liken us to be the wardens of the night,â you explain, taking a sip of your tea. âWe protect the city from the shadows, preventing an increase in petty and violent crime by discouraging lesser criminals who know that theyâll be hunted down for committing crimes in our territory.â
Your fingers thrum against your wine glass as you choose your next words carefully.
âIt goes beyond that. Port Mafia presence in Yokohama serves as a deterrence to foreign criminal organizations-â
âA right good job you guys have been doing at that,â Yosano says snidely.Â
You meet her gaze for half a second before focusing back on Kunikida. âPort Mafia presence in Yokohama serves as a deterrence to foreign criminal organizations,â you repeat coolly, ignoring the interruption. âBefore the arrival of the Guild, there have only been two occasions of foreign organizations invading our territory, both conflicts were handled by us. The Guild Incident occurred because of the Agencyâs decision to keep the weretiger-â
âThatâs not fair,â Dazai says, voice low, grip on your hand tight. âWe helped him. He needed help, so I-â
Dazai cuts himself off abruptly and you remember the night you spent with him a few weeks ago. You remember Oda Sakunosukeâs last words to him. You find yourself hesitating, considering dropping the topic for his sake, but you canât, not with so much at stake.
When you continue speaking, the words taste bitter.Â
âThe agencyâs decision to help the tiger then. Semantics. Either way, the decision laid in the Agencyâs hands, not ours,â you correct, watching as Kunikida shifts uncomfortably at your words. âIt wasnât meant to be an accusation, only a statement. Iâm not here to throw stones. My point is that we responded to the Guild Incident despite our attempts to prevent it from escalating, and we are not in a good position because of it. We faced major casualties at the hands of the Guild, several of our port warehouses were destroyed, one of our executives is deadâwe cannot handle another conflict right now and the entire world knows it. Yokohama is being circled by sharks as we speakâMurasaki Shibikuâs Morning Glory, the Inagawa and Shimazaki-kai, Yi Sangâs Crowâs Eye, Cao Xueqinâs Red Chamberâtheyâre all waiting for the first drop of blood to spill in the water. If Mori dies, itâll be as if an entire bucket of blood was spilled into the water. How well-versed are you in the organizations of the Eastern Hemisphereâs underworld, Kunikida-san?â
âNot very,â Kunikida replies tightly.Â
âDazai, what does the Red Chamber do to their enemies?âÂ
You donât have to look at Dazai to feel the way he gives you a dark look. He pointedly doesnât respond so you smile and answer your own question. A false bravado because you think your fingers might be trembling a little, and youâre sure that he can feel it, but you press on. You always press on.Â
âThey have their enemies chopped into pieces and scatter all of the different pieces across the country to prevent them from ever having a proper burial,â you say, watching a ghastly expression cross Kunikidaâs face as he looks away. âThen they hunt down all blood relatives and anyone vaguely associated with the person to have them fed to starving hounds. Do you know how the Crowâs Eye deals with their enemies?âÂ
âNo,â Kunikida replies. âI donât care to know.â
âYou will when itâs your entire ward burning because of you,â you say easily. âScorched earth. The last time the Crowâs Eye had a conflict with an organization, an entire city burned for five days straight. Thousands of casualties for an insult.â
âWhat is the point of this?â Kunikida asks, voice strainedâhe does an impressive job at hiding the way heâs unnerved by your words. âAre you trying to scare us into giving you what you want? It wonât work.â
âNot at all,â you say dismissively. âIâm just making sure you know all of the cards on the table, and again, urging you to make your decision with your head and not your heart.. There is more at stake here than just two lives. Yokohama will be plunged into chaos if Mori dies⊠the streets will run with blood, wards will burn to the ground. The Dragonâs Head Conflict will look like childâs play compared to whatâs to come, and I know you felt the effects of that conflict personally, Kunikida-san. Before making any decision, just ask yourself if this is what Fukuzawa-dono would have wanted?â
Kunikida doesnât respond, you donât expect him to. So, you slip your hand free from Dazaiâs and rise to your feet with a thin smile.
âIâll take my leave now so you can discuss your options with the other members of the Agency,â you tell them. âDazai knows how to get in contact with me once youâve come to a decision. It was a pleasure seeing you both again, Kunikida-san, Akiko-chan.â
âI warned them not to join you at the negotiation table,â Dazai sighs whimsically as he steps into your apartment. Your eyes lift from your phone to where he slides his jacket off of his shoulders and drapes it onto a kitchen chair before making his way to you on the couch. âThey didnât listen to me.â
âTheir mistake. I suppose it doesnât matter anyway, all of that was for nothing,â you say lightly, putting your phone down on the table. You donât move toward him, watching him carefully to try to gauge where heâs at. His expression is indecipherable, but his shoulders are tense and each movement he makes seems a bit stiff and jolted. âI didnât think you would show up.â
âWhy is that?âÂ
His tone changes at your question, becomes cooler and more withdrawn. His expression shifts tooâhe doesnât turn to look at you, but you can see from the angle youâre standing the way his lips curve down and his eyes sharpen. Heâs testing you for something, probably wants you to admit that he has reason to be mad at you to give him a leg up in the conversationâheâs always loved playing games like that.Â
âIâve never seen you so emotional while dealing with business,â you note instead, not giving him that leverage against you. You fold your arms over your chest and study him. âIt was⊠interesting to see.â
Youâre not in the mood to play games, but you humor him. Dazai is not pleased by your comment, you can tell from the way his gaze cuts to the side to focus on you. Now, heâs familiar: his eyes are cold and black, his expression closed off. This is the Dazai you rememberâthe one who would sit next to you at executive meetings and stand behind you during negotiations, except even now, heâs opposite you.
You hate it.
You expect him to snap back at you with something along the lines of you being more emotional than usual too because you know he felt the way your fingers were trembling at one point during the negotiations, but instead, you watch as his expression instantly smooths out and clears up. He turns a smile onto you that doesnât fully meet his eyes and you know what heâs about to do before the words even leave his lips.
âSo, whatâre we watching? There are some new movies, and Iâm gonna, yâknow, swipe your card to order some food, andâŠâ
Dazaiâs still talking. His lips are movingâyouâre watching them moveâbut his words are going in one ear, out the other. You think maybe you should take the out heâs given the two of you. The conversation that needs to be had⊠itâs not going to be a pleasant one. In fact, depending on how it goes, it might be your last one with him.Â
If you guys canât reconcile with the fact that youâre no longer on the same side, this will have to end.
You canât go into every conflict with the Agency feeling like youâre walking on eggshells because of Dazai. Your priority has been and always will be the Port Mafia. Dazaiâs decision to leave canât affect that. You also know that if heâs actively upset with you, it will affect that, because you donât like seeing Dazai upset, you never have and that hasnât changed the past four years without him.Â
If the two of you canât come to an understanding about it⊠You donât even know if itâs possible to come to an understanding about something like this, but itâs you and Dazai, so if anyone can come to an understanding about it, itâs you guys.Â
âStop,â you finally say, voice more tired than you intend for it to be. Dazai pauses and then looks at you cautiously. You wonder if heâll make an excuse and try to run once he realizes youâre not going to let this dropâit wouldnât be the first time heâs fled instead of confronting an issue. âCan we talk about this?âÂ
âTalk about what?
Oh, this boy knows how to get under your skin. You stare at him for a second, lips flat and arms crossed; he doesnât even have the decency to look ashamed. Heâs entirely unrepentant as he stares right back at you, waiting to see if youâll push the topic, but you donât want to play games with him. Youâve had a long day, youâre jet lagged, you have a headache and you donât even want to have this conversation but you know you have to have it.
âForget it,â you finally say, shaking your head. âYou can leave.â
Dazai blinks. âWhat?â he asks, voice laced with disbelief. âBut-â
âWhether you like it or not, we have to talk about this,â you say, shrugging. âIf you donât want to talk about it, you can leave. Just donât come back.â
Dazai stares at you. Heâs hurt, you can tell from the way he withdraws at your words. For a second, you really expect him to leave; youâre tense as you watch him carefully, guarding yourself so that it doesnât sting when he inevitably turns on his heel and goes back the way he came. After what feels like an eternity, his shoulders finally slump and he looks away, trying to figure out what to say.
âWhat do you want me to say?â he asks, the theatrics gone as he stares at you dully. âYou were cruel to them. Making digs at Yosano-sensei, tormenting Kunikida-kun with those descriptions of the foreign mafias and making him think that the President would want him to kill him. You were cruel. I didnât expect it, I guess.â
âDazai Osamu admitting he didnât expect something, I almost wish I got that on tape,â you say dryly. Dazaiâs expression hardens at the commentâyou probably shouldnât have said that, you know Dazai doesnât like getting vulnerable and gets especially defensive when he does, but you just couldnât help yourself. Before he can get all wound up, you continue, âI am cruel, Osamu. You know that.â
The fight seeps out of Dazai at your words. He looks away from you, and you make your way over to him. You lift your hands up to cup his cheeks as you take your place in front of him, forcing him to look at you. His eyes are heavy in a way thatâs so unfamiliar to youâyouâve been with Dazai during his worst depression episodes, youâve been with him when he puts up that whole front of the Demon Prodigy, youâve seen him hurt and youâve seen him angry, but this is⊠different. Itâs more intense. Itâs reluctant, riddled with anxiety, like thereâs a deep rooted fear that heâs worried will come true.
You wonder if heâs come to the same realization as youâthat if the two of you canât talk through this, itâll be the end.
âIâve never been on the opposite side of it,â he confesses quietly. âI⊠didnât like it.â
You⊠canât really blame him for that. As much as youâve been around Dazai while heâs been the âBlack Wraithâ and the âDemon Prodigyâ, heâs never directed it toward you. In fact, heâs always been careful to shield you from that side of him whenever possible even though he knows thatâs not necessary. You suppose you would be just as jarred if you were suddenly faced with it.Â
âIt wasnât directed toward you, Osamu,â you sigh, lifting your hand to run your fingers through his hair, watching the way his lashes flutter before you return to cupping his face. âYou know that.â
âIt was though,â he disagrees. âIt was directed toward them so it was directed toward me.â
You donât know how to respond to that. Your hands drop from his face as you look away from him, considering his words carefully and trying to figure out what to say next. This is the point of no returnâeither the two of you will be able to move forward, or this will be the end of your relationship. For real, this time because years apart and questions about whether the two of you are the same as you used to be is moot when your conflicting situations make your relationship incompatible.Â
âI canât apologize, Osamu,â you finally say, swallowing thickly. You can feel his gaze heavy on you, but you canât bring yourself to meet it. âNot for what I did. I can apologize for how it made you feel, but not for doing it⊠and I canât promise not to do it again.â
âI know,â he replies. âI donât expect you to. It was justâŠdifferent. Not in a good way. But what are we going to do about it?âÂ
He gives you a wry smile, one that you can only match half-heartedly. You watch him carefully for a moment, taking note of the hesitant expression on his face. He tries to hide it behind a curious mask, but you can see the anxiety thinly veiled behind his eyes. After a few moments, you nod for him to follow you and sit down on the couch, holding your hand out to him.
He hesitates before taking it, and youâre careful to avoid his healing wounds as you shift to lay down and pull him along with you to lay on top of you, watching as he rests his head on your chest and lets out a shaky breath. You lift your hand up to cradle the back of his head, and his eyes slide shut. His expression is still far from peaceful, you can see how his brows remain furrowed and his lips curve down, but heâs less anxious at least.Â
âWeâll figure it out,â you tell him, all of the nerves that have been bugging you since the meeting wash away now that heâs back in your arms. âWe always do.â
âI donât want to lose you,â he admits quietly. âI lose everything eventually⊠Itâs inevitable, one way or another, it always happens, but I canât handle losing you. Not ever.â
âWe made it this far,â you tell him, stroking his hair. He looks up at you and his expression is uncharacteristically vulnerable, it makes your chest tighten painfully. âWeâll be fine, Osamu. We always are. Weâll figure it out⊠Anyway, I doubt weâll be on opposite sides for long, I think the city is about to be in a lot of trouble. Weâll probably have to work alongside each other if we even want to stand a chance.â
You canât help the way you grimace, looking away. With Dostoevskyâs involvement confirmed, you have way more to worry about than just the Armed Detective Agency. Youâve heard through the grapevine that Agatha Christie and the Order of the Clocktower have been actively working with the House of the Dead, and you know very well that Dostoevsky has several other organizations in the Eastern Hemisphere in his pocketâboth the Crowâs Eye and the Morning Glory have done dirty work for him before, and Cao Xueqin will ride the coattails of whoever is fighting against the Port Mafia. Youâre surprised that he didnât make a move these past few days.Â
âWhat have you figured out about him already?â Dazai asks curiously, tilting his head up to look at you. He ghosts his lips against your jaw before settling his face in the crook of your neck. âTell me what you know, maybe we can figure something out.â
Like old times, you think wistfully back to the days the two of you would lounge on this very couch as you rattled off all of the information you gathered during interrogations and negotiations. Heâd absorb it all like a sponge and put together things and come to conclusions that wouldâve taken you hours to get to.
But itâs not old times anymore, you remind yourself dully, absently running your fingers through his hair. Even if itâs likely that the Agency and the Port Mafia will end up working together against a common enemy in the near future, thereâs no such alliance right now, so itâs risky telling him intel that could be more valuable to the Mafia if itâs the only one who is aware of it.
âNot enough yet,â you say honestly. âI was supposed to meet with Carlo Goldoni of the Family and the Pope in the Vatican before this went down. They claimed to have some intel about Dostoevsky that could be critical in the conflict with him, but I didnât get the chance to talk to them. Iâm heading back there tomorrow morning to talk to them⊠Iâll call you after depending on what they say. Maybe we can debrief.â
Maybe a reckless decision considering thereâs the off chance that Mori refuses to work with the Agency and you know that heâll be on your ass for giving them information, but the way Dazai smiles softly against your neck makes up for it.Â
âYeah,â he says quietly, and then he lets out a huff of laughter that tickles your neck. âBut donât tell me anything in detail, just enough to let me guess, that way if Mori questions you about it, you can say you didnât tell me and not be lying⊠We can make a game out of it.â
Not quite like old times, but you suppose things will never go back to how they were. Thatâs not necessarily a bad thing though, different can be goodâbetter, even. All that matters is that itâs you and him, just as it's always been, and if itâs the two of you, things will always work out.
His hand slides down to entwine with yours, and this time thereâs no question about itâitâs familiar, like home, your hands slot together like theyâd been made for each other and you almost feel stupid for questioning things so hard earlier in the day.
âYeah,â you agree with a soft smile. âYeah, we can. Weâll be alright.â
Dazai presses his lips against the hollow of your neck, and then to your jaw, and then to yours. You can feel his lips curve up against yoursâhe steals one, two, then three kisses before he sighs and nuzzles his face into the side of yours, resting his head down on the pillow next to you.
âWe will be.â
i will give my full thoughts on the chapter later but you all must understand how exhilarated i am to see dazai this morning. this week is going to be amazing, nothing will bring me down ever
A cute little toy
READER: Do it
YANDERE: Do what?
READER: Say the line. Say it.
YANDERE: . . .
READER: Please itâd be so funny.
YANDERE: . . . *in the most awkward/stiff way* You belong to me, youâre mine.
READER: Pffft
YANDERE: *cries and hides themself in a corner*
I don't need just kaiser fanfics, I need to inhale him too.
I have no idea who/what kaiser is but I am interested ( rubs hands together in an evil wayđđ)
Hi everyone! Just installed tumblr and would be glad to meet my audience :P
So these are my works, hope you'd like it
Twink death of the century
Hedwig:
my first thought was "drunk hedwig" would do this but ... i don't think she needs to be drunk to do this
au where auror harry potter ends up in the marauders time period, right by the beginning of voldemortâs rise.
harry potter who avoids hogwarts by all means (the memories are too painful) and instead tries to take down voldemort and his death eaters by himself.
harry who drops his last name in favor of the common muggle last name âevansâ to completely separate any ties to the potters (for their sakes.)
harry evans who keeps his distance from his mom, the marauders, and snape because he knows if he sees them heâs going to ruin something.
instead, harry evans catches the attention of the potter family (who is convinced he is a long lost heir), the blacks (who start to suspect he is a new up and coming dark lord), dumbledore (who believes the same), and the dark lord himself (who is intrigued by this mysteriously strong man thwarting his every move.)
i timetravelled to when my parents were still kids to destroy the dark lord but i became his lover instead!?
HI CARINE!! ITS ME đ ANON BACK WITH SOME MORE INCORRECT QUTES đ«”đŸ this time featuring that one beast au Chuuya centric Reader!! Just for clarification i will be labeling her as BC!Reader(Beast Chuuya) so that we can tell the difference between her and our regular PM!Reader
Oda: So she kissed you?
Dazai, nodding woefully while he is face first into the bar table
Oda: âŠ..and you said thank you?
Dazai, embarrassed as hell: yes
Oda, patting his back: wellâŠ..thats not that bad, it could have been worse
ââ-Meanwhile-ââ
Reader: THANK YOU?!?! WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN???
Chuuya: Heâs emotionally stunted i thought we all knew this already
ââââââââ
Dazai: Reader youâll always love me and want to be with me right?
Reader:
Reader: what
Dazai reaching into his pocket
Reader: are- are you proposing to me right now???
Dazai, pulling out a knife: what? No
Reader: then what the hell are you doing??
Dazai: blood oath!
Reader:
Reader: you know what that makes so much more sense
ââââââââ
Dazai and Chuuya kneeling in-front of reader after she left them alone for five minutes and they trashed her apartment during their fight
Reader: I AM AT A LOSS FOR WORDS
Dazai, dramatically retelling the story to Oda & Ango: And despite being loss for words, she yelled at me and chuuya for the next forty five minutes đ
ââââââââ
B!Chuuya: you know what your problem is? Your really cute so no one ever told you to shut your mouth
BC!Reader:
BC!Reader: You think im cute? đ„č
B!Chuuya:
B!Chuuya, flustered: Shut your mouth!
ââââââââ
B!Chuuya on the verge of a meltdown and paranoid because Albatross accidentally lead a (now dead) mafia grunt near BC!Readerâs apartment
B!Chuuya: SHUT UP! Im going to kill the next person i fucking see I swear to god-
Albatross genuinely trying to calm him down before he pops a blood vessel
BC!Reader who just returned home: Chuuya!! Hi! Im so happy to see your okay! Is this a friend a of yours? :D
B!Chuuya: âŠâŠHeyâŠ.oh my god itâs so nice toâŠsee you too
Albatross trying not to lose his shit
ââââââââ
B!Chuuya: Me and BC!Reader dont use nicknames for eachother, we arenât even dating-
Albatross: What do beeâs make
B!Chuuya: Honey??
BC!Reader poking her head into the room: Yes Chuuya?
B!Chuuya:
Albatross: Dont lie to my face ever again
PFFFFFFFFF GET OUTTTTT THESE ARE STILL MY FAVORITE THINGS EVER IM CRYING I WON'T LIE IVE READ THESE SO MANY TIMES SINCE YOUVE SENT THEM
AFHSUFHSAUDFHU THE FIRST ONE KILLS ME BECAUSE IT'S SO ACCURATE LMAOOO, DAZAI GOING TO CRY TO ODASAKU AND READER BITCHING TO CHUUYA LOLLLLLLLL CHUUYA IS SO SICK OF THEM.
THE BLOOD OATH ONE LMAO HE SO WOULD AND THEN AUFIHSUFDSHU HAHAHAHAH THE ONE WHERE SHES LIKE IM AT A LOSS FOR WORDS AND DAZAI'S LIKE AND THEN SHE PROCEEDED TO YELL FOR 45 MINUTES. ITS SO THEM LMAO
AND THE CHUUYA ONES HAVE ME CRYING IM SO GLAD U ADDED ALBATROSS IN THERE TOO IT HAS ME GIGGLING SO HARD
Due to the continued lack of progress, I am back, seeking help from the vagrant scum of this subreddit.
Dear basement dwellers and unwashed perverts: If even I, Tom Riddle, cannot get a date, then there truly is no hope for the rest of you.
Time to freshen up your cleaning charms and âlock inâ.
For those of you whining about how I ought to just âapproach him like a normal personâ- I am not a normal person. I am a God, baptized in the blood of my enemies. Stop giving me meaningless platitudes, and start helping me smell his hair!
His little sycophant has been following him around everywhere, which has only made approaching him harder. Orion calls himself Harryâs âbest friendâ, but everyone knows Harry only hangs out with him because he feels so sorry for him. (Generations of inbreeding made one ugly baby lol!)
Harryâs very charitable like that. All the more reason to indoctrinate him into my cult, but heâs being weirdly stubborn about the whole thing?
âI donât wanna learn dark magic, Tom.â
âI donât believe in blood surpremacy, Tom.â
âStop trying to take me into your murder dungeon, Tom.â
Isnât that ridiculous? Anyone with half a brain would love to be invited into my murder dungeon the esteemed chamber built by my lineage!
Harry is very lucky to have so many muscles, as no one expects much brilliance from him. Still, I know heâs cleverer than he lets on. Just the other day, he noticed me cursing Grace Bell for lingering too long outside of the Quidditch changing rooms.
I was just looking out for him. And clearly I was right to do so, since I caught her creeping around while I was waiting for him to emerge, shirtless and damp, from his post game shower. Imagine the kind of obsessed weirdos heâd have to deal with if I wasnât there to curse them all!
Still, other people would have been totally fooled- but not Harry. He gets me.
Clearly, heâs paying a lot of attention to me, so how can I capitalize on that? I tried spilling a bit of my potion on him in class the other day, so I could remove my shirt sensually and dry the liquid off of him. Only, then he started shouting at me about how I âwasnât going to get away with this like I did with Myrtle.â
See- another example of how well he knows me! (Thatâs a girl I killed near my murder dungeon lol)
As you can see, this is a dire situation. Hurry up and provide me with some useful information before he kisses the incest baby.
Harry is very handsome, and I cannot afford to waste time. I have enclosed a photograph of him so that you wastes of genetic material understand the stakes.
[Harry_Potter_Riddle.Jpeg]
suziehiggins: oh, i get it. that guy is adorable
| OP: Stay away from my man, Susan.
Orion.Black: @harryjamespotterr
| OP: You will rue this day, you incestuous hellspawn.
harryjamespotter: Tom, is this some kind of prank?
| OP: Who is Tom Iâve never heard that name in my life.
| harryjamespotter: you literally posted a picture of yourself in the last updateâŠ
| ed_hardy: Itâs okay, he was just catfishing
| OP: NO I WAS NOT
goonermachine: did you doodle Tom + Harry = Soulmates all over his picture?
| OP: I know you have eyes so I donât see why youâre asking me such a stupid question. Yes
Due to the continued lack of progress, I am back, seeking help from the vagrant scum of this subreddit.
Dear basement dwellers and unwashed perverts: If even I, Tom Riddle, cannot get a date, then there truly is no hope for the rest of you.
Time to freshen up your cleaning charms and âlock inâ.
For those of you whining about how I ought to just âapproach him like a normal personâ- I am not a normal person. I am a God, baptized in the blood of my enemies. Stop giving me meaningless platitudes, and start helping me smell his hair!
His little sycophant has been following him around everywhere, which has only made approaching him harder. Orion calls himself Harryâs âbest friendâ, but everyone knows Harry only hangs out with him because he feels so sorry for him. (Generations of inbreeding made one ugly baby lol!)
Harryâs very charitable like that. All the more reason to indoctrinate him into my cult, but heâs being weirdly stubborn about the whole thing?
âI donât wanna learn dark magic, Tom.â
âI donât believe in blood surpremacy, Tom.â
âStop trying to take me into your murder dungeon, Tom.â
Isnât that ridiculous? Anyone with half a brain would love to be invited into my murder dungeon the esteemed chamber built by my lineage!
Harry is very lucky to have so many muscles, as no one expects much brilliance from him. Still, I know heâs cleverer than he lets on. Just the other day, he noticed me cursing Grace Bell for lingering too long outside of the Quidditch changing rooms.
I was just looking out for him. And clearly I was right to do so, since I caught her creeping around while I was waiting for him to emerge, shirtless and damp, from his post game shower. Imagine the kind of obsessed weirdos heâd have to deal with if I wasnât there to curse them all!
Still, other people would have been totally fooled- but not Harry. He gets me.
Clearly, heâs paying a lot of attention to me, so how can I capitalize on that? I tried spilling a bit of my potion on him in class the other day, so I could remove my shirt sensually and dry the liquid off of him. Only, then he started shouting at me about how I âwasnât going to get away with this like I did with Myrtle.â
See- another example of how well he knows me! (Thatâs a girl I killed near my murder dungeon lol)
As you can see, this is a dire situation. Hurry up and provide me with some useful information before he kisses the incest baby.
Harry is very handsome, and I cannot afford to waste time. I have enclosed a photograph of him so that you wastes of genetic material understand the stakes.
[Harry_Potter_Riddle.Jpeg]
suziehiggins: oh, i get it. that guy is adorable
| OP: Stay away from my man, Susan.
Orion.Black: @harryjamespotterr
| OP: You will rue this day, you incestuous hellspawn.
harryjamespotter: Tom, is this some kind of prank?
| OP: Who is Tom Iâve never heard that name in my life.
| harryjamespotter: you literally posted a picture of yourself in the last updateâŠ
| ed_hardy: Itâs okay, he was just catfishing
| OP: NO I WAS NOT
goonermachine: did you doodle Tom + Harry = Soulmates all over his picture?
| OP: I know you have eyes so I donât see why youâre asking me such a stupid question. Yes
i wanted to draw sunday why did this freak take over
nobody say a fucking word about tumblr we canât remind these billionaires we exist
idk if it's just me but i'm glad that the majority of people outside of here believe tumblr is a dead site because like i've been here for 13 years and like this is my house??? i don't need thousands upon thousands of people flocking here it'd be like inviting chimps to a house party total fucking carnage
I actually NEED the squid game au like it's oxygen
I hope you'll like my own games I've put into it! Fun enough, I came up with them myself and then saw someone on TikTok using them for their au and I was like ... great minds think alike
I'm not sure where or how to end it but I'll work it out :)