Block People Who Make Bad Faith Posts About Trans Women's Struggles By Saying Trans Men Do Not Struggle.

re: that other post. i HATE HATE HATE the modern trans discourse thats just "boys versus girls but Progressive this time I Promise ^_^" like you have GOT to be kidding me. its so so so odd to me that people can Be transgender and still come to the conclusion that Bioessentialism is Good actually, cis people are just doing it wrong. come the fuck on. does anyone remember when it was considered STUPID in the trans community to be policing peoppe based on agab. remember when it was embarrassing to Ask what gender someone was before transitioning. im walking in circles i feel ill Hello

you notice how even when transandrophobes strain their brains to come up with One Nice Thing to say about trans men, it's always some version of "they are useful to me"? Like, "oh it's a shame all trans men are mras now, they'd be good for a fuck otherwise" "i used to know this cool trans man who helped me realise my own identity back in the day, too bad they all suck now" "my trans men friends say it's totally okay for me to say these things about their demographic because they're cool and normal". Never even about general contributions to culture, it's canonical that trans men are completely incapable of producing anything of value after all, not about activism, just what trans men have done or could do to specifically benefit them personally. It's really revealing of the actual motives behind opposing trans mens self-advocacy.

it's kind of a you problem if you read "this is a problem that also affects me" and assume it to mean "i only care about this problem because it affects me. i would not care if it only affected you"

i've seen this a lot more often in reference to anti-trans legislature recently. people acting as though only trans women will be affected by it and then getting mad at trans men and nonbinary people for daring to mention we're also negatively impacted by it

can we just have a community please. i want a community. can we not fight over who has it worse all the time and just give eachother support

i'm going to keep banging this drum forever, stop treating groups of marginalised people as "sides" in discourse. stop saying you distrust trans women because of the evil hysterical transradfems. stop saying you distrust non-binary people because of the evil privileged theyfabs. stop saying you distrust trans men because of the evil MRA transandrobros. stop saying you distrust intersex people because of the evil transphobic cis invaders.

stop hearing people complain about bigotry with no comment on who the person perpetuating it was and imagining a marginalised person in your mind. stop justifying bigotry against others because it's against the "side" of discourse that you personally dislike. stop assuming everything a certain marginalised group talks about has to do with whatever petty discourse you're involved in. stop tolerating blatant bigots because you see them as "on your side".

if it's getting to a point where online discourse is so important to you that it influences how you view marginalised people who have done nothing to you, then maybe it's time to log off for a while and start hiking or knitting or something, mostly because it just can't be very good for your health to constantly prime yourself to be anxious or angry around everyone you meet.

I want to make some points clear to debunk the whole “trans men are just future detransitioned women” idea that’s been floating around:

The detransition rates of people who identify as trans men/masc and trans women/fem(me) are going to be pretty much the same, but TERF propaganda makes examples out of people who have detransitioned from male to female in order to support the claim that the trans community are “infecting” young girls. Their obsession with women “mutilating” their bodies causes them to pounce on anyone who detransitions from male/masc to female and use them as symbols of the “trans cult.” TERFs deliberately inflate the number of detransitioners, especially amongst trans men/mascs, in order to support their ideology. Do not fall for it.

The actual rate of detransitioning as a whole is already incredibly small, and an even smaller minority of that, go on to detransition “back” to a cis identity. In reality, the majority of detransitioners tend to detransition into a different gender identity that feels more comfortable to them, rather than their birth identity, and may still identify as trans— just not in the way they initially thought. Other reasons for detransitioning may include safety reasons or a lack of access to gender affirming care. By assuming that all detransitioners are people who have “returned” to identifying as cis, you are once again falling for TERF propaganda. TERFs do not care about detransitioners who still identify as trans or non-binary or some other form of gender divergent, nor do they care about people who detransition simply because they are not able to transition in the first place. You should care. Not all detransitioners identify as cis, and the community would do well to remember that.

TERFs are a cult, and cults groom their members. A lot of people struggling with their gender identity may fall into TERF spaces because they will initially be treated with sympathy and understanding, when in reality, their ultimate goal is to detransition someone. They will groom vulnerable people with rhetorics such as “the trans community will try to persuade you to transition and make you think that you need to escape your womanhood” or “we can help you to accept yourself for who you really are as a woman, because society has made you hate yourself for your gender non-conformity and tomboyish nature” and other such bullshit that only serves to break someone down into believing that their identity issues come from a trans-obsessed, woman-hating society. When you see prominent detransitioners who pedal TERF propaganda, it is very likely that they have been forced into pushing down their real issues in favour of finding acceptance in a group that claims to care about them. If we can find sympathy for people who have been forced into conversion therapy, or forced to hide their sexualities/gender identities because of the religious fanaticism around them, then you need to find sympathy for people who have been groomed by a cult into hating themselves. No, that does not mean excusing them for hurting the trans community by becoming handmaidens for TERFs, but understanding that they have also been hurt— and are being hurt— by TERFs may help us to acknowledge that a lot of these people needed support systems that they weren’t able to find quickly enough.

A lot of the most well-known detransitioners may still struggle with their gender identity, and are simply repressing it because they’ve been groomed too far into a cult that lied to them, and leaving that cult without a support system behind them is a terrifying thought. However, it needs to be acknowledged that all of this discourse amongst the trans community, particularly a growing hatred for trans men/mascs or non-binary people, is exactly why TERFs are able to groom them in the first place. In fact, the idea that “trans women and trans men are diametrically opposed to each other” is just TERF propaganda to encourage trans men to feel like they’re not accepted in the trans community and therefore need to find solace in TERF spaces, who will use their shared experiences of “girlhood” to prey on the fact that trans men have been made to hate themselves. Seeing other trans people spread around this idea is exactly what TERFs want. They want trans men/mascs and non-binary people who were born as women to turn away from the trans community so they can literally detransition them back into women. Don’t do their fucking job for them.

A lot of detransitioners are— surprise surprise— not assholes. The only ones we’re seeing are the ones that prominent TERFs are uplifting, when the ones who slide under the radar and are free to explore their gender identity how they want tend to not feel the need to throw the trans community under the bus. I’ve talked to many detransitioners before who weren’t groomed by the TERF cult and a lot of them speak very highly of the trans community because they were able to find space to learn about themselves, and regardless of what they eventually identified as, there was a mutual understanding that freedom to gender affirming care is beneficial for everybody. By using TERF detransitioners as examples of all detransitioners, you’re just excluding some of the most vocal supporters of gender affirming care that I’ve ever come across. Support them back!! The best way to fight against TERFs weaponising detransitioners is by supporting detransitioners, recognising their struggles, and uplifting the voices of those who do not spread TERF propaganda.

There is nuance to be had here, because insinuating that the current trans community is actively judgmental of detransitioners is, in itself, TERF propaganda, but it’s crucial that you don’t fall for it or let TERFs convince you that detransitioners are the enemy. Because I have heard stories from detransitioners who’ve experienced genuine hostility from queer spaces they’ve been in, so it’s always important to check your biases and make sure you’re not falling into any traps.

TL;DR: trans men are not future detransitioned women. The tiny, miniscule percentage of TERF detransitioners who identify as cisgender that you see are being propped up by other TERFs in order to spread propaganda, despite the fact that TERFs do not actually care about them or their struggles, and they have most likely been groomed into detransitioning in the first place (or at least, they have been groomed into an unhealthy and harmful mindset that will inevitably hurt them in the long run). Anyone who says that trans men are destined to detransition, or that detransitioners are the enemy, or that all detransitioners have cis privilege and should be shunned from the community are all falling into TERF ideology and should not be listened to.

If you respond to a trans person discussing their experiences and go “that’s not true” you’re just an asshole.

Since it was also said about a trans person’s experiences it’s also a transphobic statement, yeah. But sometimes I feel like we miss how much it’s just… a shitty thing to say to a person, regardless.

If someone says that something is their experience, telling them that isn’t true is asshole behaviour. It’s not how you should treat another human being.

it actively holds everyone back when you equate femininity and femmeness to weakness. whenever you imply that feminine people and femmes are inherently weak, in need of protection, inherently submissive, incapable of hurting others, and pathetic, you are holding everyone back: women, men, people of all kinds, trans, cis, intersex, non binary and beyond.

femmes do not inherently need to be protected. feminine people do not inherently need to be looked after. femmes are not incapable of defending themselves, of being strong, of being capable of protecting others, of being independent, of being masculine as well, or being assertive or dominant. femmes and feminine people are capable of being just as diverse as any other group of people and when you insinuate that femininity is inherently tied to weakness you fail everyone.

mascs and butches aren't inherently strong, and they don't have to be. femmes and feminine people aren't inherently weak and they don't have to be. perpetuating these cisheterosexual norms in the queer community does no one any favors.

I don't mean any offense here, but I'm not sure it's a good idea to call this a trend? Like, 90% of my IRL friend group is transfem furries. "[Animal][Girl][Cock]" is not a discourse thing, it's a furry tgirl thing. I've seen plenty of people with usernames that follow this theme who are perfectly lovely people- more than I've seen discourse blogs that follow the theme.

I think a lot of the discourse assholes just also happen to be transfem furries. There's no strong correlation, and it's not causation. Just coincidence.

what are the trends? what are the username trends for transandrophobic posters? any specifics?

Typically [animal][girl][slang term for penis]

(Mandatory disclaimer for those lacking reading comprehension - As implied with the term "trend," this is not 100% an identifyer for transandrophobic trans women.)

Are you actually ‘unsafe’ because of the mere existence of trans men or are you just still wrapped up in gender essentialism and don’t want to do the work of breaking down and reevaluating your bigotries and biases?