Are You A Mix Of Oxygen And Potassium? Cause I Think You’re O K

Girl:*walks up to my crowded table* Hey guys, is there anywhere I can sit?

Me:*gives a small smirk* If you want you can sit on my lap, but I’m told my face is way more comfortable..

Group:*Whooping and shouting* OOOO! Oooo!!!

glasses feat. me hitting on my friends

I got a crush on a band chick and this happened

I like Legos, you like Legos, why don’t we build a relationship?

Me? A vegan? Oh honey no, I’m a vagitarian and I’ve got my sights set on my next meal.

I am totally going to use this from now on when I pick up women.

nice asteroids

Kara can’t resist Lena’s pick up lines

My friend told me this balloon would get me the ladies so here it goes: Are you a dinosaur? Because jurASSics beautiful!

i went on google to search “lesbian pickup lines” but accidentally typed “lesbian lickup lines”... enough said