I Think Everyone Needs A God Of Some Kind. And By That I Don’t Strictly Mean Religion. You Need Something

Who would have thought it?

My first draco x !femreader. 

Part II

English is not my first language sorry it’s something feel awkward.

1,4k words

Everyone was excited about Yule Ball but you couldn’t be less bothered about it. 

Changing classes was a spectacle since Yule Ball was two weeks ahead. Boys and girls declaring their love in every single corner. Such a cheesy view made you want to shut yourself in your bedroom and not go out until everything came to an end. Why was everyone so desperate?

As a Ravenclaw anything apart from books, classes, etc. was a waste of time. Going to the Yule Ball wouldn't make you pass Snape’s exams.

“y/n” your friend called you several times before you could hear her “Any date for the Yule Ball?”

“You too?” you spited out almost offended. Why are you so obsessed? You asked her trying to figure out how a dance could make people go insane.

“C’mon, you could relax.” she laughed “Tell me the truth, not even a Durmstrang student makes you want to go to the ball?” she added when some of them walked by your left.

Your eyes landed on them, they were handsome, tall and the dream of every girl or boy. But not yours…

A huge group of people in front of the class you were going to made you curious. “What is going on?”

“It’s happening again” your friend laughed excitedly while she dragged you with her to have a better view. It wasn’t a surprise to find a certain blonde in the middle of that fuss. A really nervous Slytherin was in front of him with her eyes shut down and with her whole body shaking.

“She must be the fifteenth or even the twentieth.” Another Slytherin murmured behind you.

Your brain started to put the pieces together. As the most popular Slytherin, Draco Malfoy was a very desirable target for the Yule Ball, but you didn’t expect to witness a proposal, and even more, as far you had heard it wasn’t the first one.

“Do you want to be my date to Yule Ball?” the girl in front of Draco said with a honeyed voice.

The boy didn't seem very amazed. Giving a fast peek at his surroundings, sighed in frustration with his hand buried in his blonde hair. Your eyes met for a few seconds and he narrowed them in your presence. The truth was that you weren’t friends, not even acquaintances but for a mysterious reason he detested you. You were a great witch from a good family, none blood thing could justify his aversion. But every time you crossed paths you felt like you did something wrong.

His face displayed an annoyed gesture, and his fingers went to his temples, massaging them. “I don’t have time for this rubbish.” his head turned away from you and landed on the poor Slytherin’s girl. “Get lost.” he huffed just the right moment McGonagall appeared, dissolving the big crowd. “Whatever is happening can continue after my class.” she announced heading every student inside.

The next classes were very peaceful, no more random events on the hallway. You and your friend were on your way to the Great Hall when you remembered you needed to return a book. Your friend and you split apart, and you hurried up your way.

The hallways were empty, everyone one was on their break. You were grateful for a little bit of peace, you took your time in the library wandering around, it didn't surprise you when you found another Ravenclaw. The library was the temple of all of you, but it didn’t feel right when he started to smile in your direction and not take his eyes off of you. Something was wrong and it pissed you.

It almost gave you a heart attack when he faced you the moment you put one foot out the library. “y/n, can we talk for a moment?” he asked you kindly with his face tinted slightly pink. That scene recalled a certain moment of the morning and your hands started to sweat. The boy in front of you was the same age but you hadn’t exchanged many words through the years, you didn't even know his name. You bit your lower lip trying to kill the urge of running away. “Sure…” you hesitated in a lower voice and with your hands clenched to your cape

“I hope it isn’t too late.” he whispered, rubbing his neck “By any chance would you like to go with me to Yule Ball?”

You froze and your usual eloquence disappeared. You couldn’t imagine that that would happen to you. You didn't plan a negative for the occasion, and you didn't want to go to the ball, because the truth was that HE would never ask you to go with him, and no one else had your interest.

“I’m sorry but…” you faltered to say. Your mouth was dry, and you couldn’t find the words.

“What y/n want to say is that she is already taken.” a very known voice interrupted you. Your brows raised in surprise when you saw Draco come out from behind a pillar.

“That's true?” the Ravenclaw looked at you with surprise, you were surprised as well, in which world were you Draco’s date? Maybe you just hit your head.

He came closer and one of his arms wrapped around your waist, your whole body shivered. He was the only one who could make you feel like that. “It’s true” you lied with your face completely red and avoiding the eyes of any of the boys. Sadly, it was a lie you wanted to believe with all your heart. The Ravenclaw gave up and disappeared after he looked at you very surprised. Your heart was pounding in your chest, you were alone with Draco and you were afraid to do or say anything that could break the spell.

“Why have you done that?” you slapped Draco away, as much as you wanted that touch you didn't want it to be as a part of a lie. He faced you with his beautiful grey eyes and smirked maciously. “Don't you know?” he whispered in your ear. You blushed entirely, your face, your neck, etc. “I thought you hated me.” you answered with your eyes locked on the floor, you were unable to look him in the face. Your head was spinning, you couldn't forget all those scornful looks in the hallway.

He grabbed you by the chin and lifted it forcing you to look at him. "And I hate you.” he said in a deep voice. “I hate your indifferent face every time we meet, the way you smile at all your friends.” You got goose bumps but trying not to be intimidated you answered "If I didn't know you, I'd say you have feelings for me..." you tilted your head with innocence and a wide smile on your face. You weren't going to let Malfoy have all the control of the situation, if he wanted to play dirty you also knew. The blond boy looked at you in surprise, you had left him speechless. Point for you. But he seemed to recover immediately, clinging to your hips, and trapping you against the nearest wall, his head rising to your height, and your faces just a few inches away. “You've always been very smart.” he sighed on your neck, making you turn your head to the side leaving even more bare skin in sight. He deposited a quick kiss in the crack of your neck "What about you? he started to play with a strand of your hair. Your head was full of Malfoy, your legs were shaking and since he had cornered you against that wall you were unable to add two plus two. Everything seemed like a dream. A dirty one, but with Draco it couldn't be any other way. You managed to hear his question, he wanted to know how you felt even if he had not spoken, not verbally. “I'd say it's a tie.” you almost moaned when he pulled up your skirt caressing your thighs. He rested his forehead on yours, enraptured by your half-open mouth, your watery eyes and your heavy breath. “What do you say if we try to break the tie? '' he smiled “You and me at the Yule Ball.”

You smiled at him. “Deal.” you whispered, taking him by his tie to press his lips against you in a hungry kiss. He took advantage immediately and did not hold back. You melted in his embrace and bit his lower lip when you felt his hard bulge against your centre.

Who would have thought it? You had a date.

Today I’ve realized that I have to choose between to be stuck forever or being in pain for a while and finally heal.

-Trillium by Louise Gluck

When your flatmate is a jerk.

James Barnes (Bucky) is your new flatmate and so far living together has not gone very well.

2K.

PART 2

Warnings: Not a smut, kinda soft but with a little bit of spicy. (Eng not my first language.)

You hadn't even been living together for two months and you already couldn't stand that asshole named James Buchanan Barnes. The cost of living in New York was exorbitant and when your flatmate left you alone without a previous notice you had no choice but to accept the first stranger who answered your ad, well the first one who didn't look like a serial killer or a pervert. How wrong you were… Sleeping at night had become impossible, when James didn't bring a girl, he spent the nights tossing and turning in his room. That man didn't know what rest meant. If things went on like that, your bosses were going to throw you out of work, nobody wanted a zombie for an employee. 

You needed a way to bring the matter up and make it clear to your flatmate that he had to learn to be less noisy. But how could you look him in the face and tell him that his hoarse moans were keeping you awake at night? 

Well ,that morning was going to be the definitive one, during breakfast you would tell him. The night before the blue-eyed man hadn't brought any friend with him, so you wouldn't have to face a naked stranger, just a freshly risen James, with tousled hair, no shirt, and grey sweatpants that left little to the imagination. Shit, if you hated him so much for depriving you of a good night's rest, why did you bite your lip until it almost bled when you were in the same room?

"Good morning," his deep morning voice caught you off guard, making you almost choke with your coffee when he showed up in the kitchen. 

 “Morning” was the only thing you could mumble, all the determination you had gathered a few minutes before, disappeared in the presence of that man. “I was about to make pancakes, do you want some?” you managed to pull yourself together, your main idea was to soften him up with some treat and then drop the bomb.

“Sure” he accepted, a little suspicious. The fake smile on your face did not go unnoticed. Normally the only thing he got out of you in the mornings was a grunt or two.

You turned your back to him to focus on making breakfast, you just hoped you didn't burn anything, you knew your kindness hadn't gone unnoticed and James was analysing you from head to toe, making your stomach tingle from that intense stare.

You devoured the pancakes in complete silence. In the short time you had lived together you hadn’t found anything in common, so apart from things to do with the rent or the bills, you had nothing to talk about. But Barnes didn't seem to mind, he was too captivated by the way you were sucking on the honey-coated fork, although it didn't escape his notice that you wanted to tell him something, even he could hear the gears in your head turning.  

"Just say it." he grunted as your tongue went from playing with the fork to your lips, that game was starting to cause him problems in his sweatpants, and it wasn't easy trying to hide his half-erection. 

“Eh?” your innocent expression made him even more upset. 

"If you have something to say to me, say it now, I don't have all morning," he sounded more abrupt than he meant it to, but that only made all your pent-up rage of those days come out of your mouth, unfiltered. 

"All right, that's what you want... how about you keep your fucking voice down when you bring someone to the flat or better yet, why don't you join one of those sex addiction groups? Because you've got a fucking problem and I'm not going to put up with any more sleepless nights," you blurted out without thinking, your eyes fixed on the blue ones that seemed to open wider and wider with every word that came out of your mouth. 

Barnes' astonished face turned into a grin of amusement as he recovered from your speech, "Ohh, honey, I think you're overreacting. You're not jealous that I'm the only one having fun at night, are you?” he took you by your chin, caressing your jawline.

“How dare you?” you slapped him away and you were really close to punch him in his pretty face but you restrained yourself. Revenge sounded better. If he wanted to go the hard way that's how it would be, you were going to give him a taste of his own medicine.

***

You had been chatting with a guy for a few weeks, he was cute but just not interesting enough to want to get to know him more. He had insisted a couple of times to meet and you finally found the reasons to do so. That idiot James was going to have to eat his words. Who did he think he was? The worst thing is that you hadn't been able to stop thinking about Barnes all day. You only wanted to get revenge, right? It had nothing to do with the fact that that caress had left you longing for something you couldn't yet put into words, but your imagination had, and it had given you a very clear picture of what it would be like to have James on top of you. Fuck! You just wanted to forget about it, and focus on your revenge. The date was set up, you and that guy were to meet at a bar near your house, just a little warm up before taking him with you and show Bucky how things worked.

A few hours later you were playing with your Martini. That man was really boring; he only knew to talk about him and his exes. He was so absorbed in himself that he didn't care if you were listening or not and you only could think about running away, but you had already gone too far... With a coy smile you touched his arm and batting your lashes you tried to get his attention. "I know a better place to talk." you said almost without recognizing your own voice. "My flat is very close... What do you say?" you made yourself sick. Why is it that deep down all felt so wrong?

By the time you got to your flat you were shaking in your boots, you were regretting your wonderful idea, but your stubbornness prevented you from letting James get away with it. As soon as you turned the key the last thing you expected to find was your enemy waiting for you to return, or that was the impression you got when your gazes met, Barnes had got up from the sofa and seemed to want to say something to you, but it was enough for the dark-haired man to see your companion for that feeling to disappear. "Who is this guy?" James asked with his worst manners. 

"Oh, Hi, I didn't know you'd be home" you lied through your teeth. "We don't want to disturb you, my friend and I will be in my room." you tried to sound as innocent as possible. It's fair to say that you had completely forgotten the guy's name. 

"Y/n can I talk to you for a moment?" James approached you, blocking your way to your room, but you didn't have time to dodge him because all you could think about was how good he smelled. Someone had taken a shower and his cologne was knocking out all your common sense. It was lavender and mint, right? At that point the other guy seemed to have ceased to exist. 

"We can talk later." you managed to articulate as you came to your senses. 

"Don't do this..." he stopped you by grabbing your wrist but not forcibly, just to stop you from running off with that loser. His voice sounded almost the same as always, but if you hadn't been so nervous you would have noticed that his eyes were tinged with desperation.  

"Okay, okay, what's going on here?" That big mouth remembered how to talk. The weird vibes you two were giving was too much to handle for his small brain. James stepped away from you and you froze, not knowing what to say. "Is this some weird thing like couples who like to see each other with someone else?" he added, leaving you dumbfounded. Before you could react, your flatmate did. 

"Get out of my fucking house!" he imposed, bringing out for the first time the soldier he once was. One of the few things you knew about him was that he was a veteran, but that was something he never used to talk about. His dog tags hanging around his neck gave you an idea.

Then, it all happened so fast that it seemed unreal. Barnes was shoving your date out and he was being more dick than ever. After slamming the door shut, James cornered you against it. "What the fuck was that all about?" he questioned, blocking your escape with his muscular arms. He was pissed off, you could tell by the swollen vein on his forehead and how his breath had become heavier. 

"I just wanted to have some fun..." you managed to articulate with your eyes locked on the ground as you were unable to look him in the face, too embarrassed by everything that had just happened. "Besides, I don't owe you any explanation." you dared to add. 

"So you want to have fun, right?" he seemed to snap, "I can fix that." his voice lowered a few tones and your whole body shivered when he made you look at him. "You only have to ask nicely..." his gaze looked wolfish and hungry. If he needed a reaction from you to keep going, the way you were biting your lips was enough, but at that point he wanted to make you beg. 

“Why should I?” you arched your brows with all the strength you had left. He was driving you crazy, but in a completely different way than before, however you didn't want to give up so easily. Barnes stroked your arm, barely touching you, but immediately causing goose bumps all over your skin. 

“Because that's all you can think about since this morning.” he saw right through you, but it didn't save him from being a jerk. That was enough… You were tired of him playing with you.

“Fuck you!” you pushed him with all your might, but before you could get away, he lifted you over his shoulder and carried you to his room. On the way you kicked as much as you could, but it was like hitting a wall. He left you on the edge of his bed, and crouched down in front of you with his hands up, wanting you to know that he was coming in peace. “I know I owe you an apology." he looked genuinely sorry, “This morning I behaved like a dick.”. 

“Only this morning?” you mumbled, avoiding his gaze because you knew you would be unable to resist his puppy eyes. James sat down next to you and let out a low snort.

"I know I haven't been the best flatmate." Then he plopped down on the bed and his gaze was lost somewhere on the ceiling. "I have no excuse, but this is the first time I've lived with anyone after leaving the army." he confessed and it felt like that was the first time you had a real conversation. "I guess I've lost my manners."

You dropped down next to him, mirroring him. "Your manners aren't the problem, you just need to stop moaning so loudly," you chuckled to yourself and rolled onto your side to make yourself more comfortable, finding yourself face to face with James. You felt your cheeks flush, you had never seen Barnes like that before, without that armour that seemed to accompany him everywhere he went. "I'll try my best." he laughed with you. 

You let silence fall between both of you and just stared at each other. Without really knowing how, the distance between you was getting shorter, your eyes kept going back and forth from James' eyes to his lips, he seemed to notice and with a soft grin in his face he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. 

Do you have a crush??

Me: Noooooooo

Also me: *writing a poem about him*

Luigi Rossi - Primavera (detail)

carrying the weight of my unfulfilled dreams everyday is getting kinda hard ngl

New Days

The second part from my first Draco x !freader it's here...

Hope you like it!!

(ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE)

Part I

1,4k words

Your daily routine hadn't changed much since your encounter with Draco Malfoy, well it hadn't changed if you didn't count all the times since then that you spent anywhere quite far away with that blond who made you shiver.

The rumour had already spread around the school, your Ravenclaw beau hadn't wasted any time, but you were fine with the situation as long as people talked from afar and didn't bother you.

But that day you had to face your friend's interrogation, at least she deserved answers.

“How long have you been with Malfoy behind my back?” she asked without understanding how or when that had happened.

“Almost two weeks.” You answered with a face as red as a tomato and fiddling with the food on your plate. Feeling Draco's eyes on you in the Great Hall, whenever you were apart, hadn't helped you to hold normal conversations.

“So, the mark on your neck wasn't a mosquito?” she glanced at you somewhere between amused and embarrassed.

“No…” you confessed, remembering the number of hickeys Malfoy had devoted himself to leaving on your neck, marking you as his own.

“I can't believe it.” she laughed out loud. “Who made the first move?”

“He took the initiative and I did the rest.” you said proudly.

“Look at you... And I thought you only had eyes for the characters in those novels you read.” she mocked you.

It was true that the only person who had aroused your fascination was the famous Slytherin. You didn't know why, but before you knew it, your gaze was already following him everywhere, trying to decipher what it was hiding behind those cold and lonely eyes.

The same seemed to have happened to him, or so he confessed to you on one of your nocturnal escapades. He didn't understand how anyone could look at him with such indifference, and he promised himself that he would get some kind of reaction from the face he had fallen in love with.

You two still had a deal to keep, the Yule Ball was in less than three days. The Heads of Houses had already started to teach you the necessary rules, though you could only think about what Draco would look like in a suit.

Oh, hell! You hadn't even considered what you were going to wear, your head had been occupied with far more amusing thoughts.

That evening your friend came along with you to Hogsmeade, your parents had sent you some money and you were hoping to find something decent at Gladrags amongst all those socks.

You wanted to dazzle Draco, to see his pupils dilate in your presence so that he could think of nothing but you. So you went to great lengths to find a dress to match the situation.

As you imagined, there was hardly anything worthwhile left on the hangers in that shop. You went round and round, searching every possible nook and cranny, but nothing. Just as you were about to give up, a piece of blue cloth, hanging on a nearby rack, caught your eye. You couldn't even get your hands on it before a group of Slytherin girls who had been lurking around the shop got to it before you could.

"Did you want this?” one of them asked you mischievously. “Well you wouldn't know how to wear it anyway, some people just aren't cut out for classy clothes.”

You were caught unawares. It was the first time you had ever been the target of a Slytherin and you thought you knew why.

“Why don't you mind your own business?” Your friend stood up for you.

“Give it up, it's not worth it. Some people have too much time on their hands.” You stopped her before things got ugly.

It couldn't bother you any less, that attempted sabotage only meant that they knew Draco was no longer on the market.

You left the shop disappointed that you hadn't found a dress for the ball. Although the bad mood lasted as long as it took you to find Draco strolling around Hogsmeade with Crabbe and Goyle.

“Well, well, but who do we have here?” his expression turned from his typical frown to a warm, relaxed smile as you approached him.

You didn't miss the surprised faces of Malfoy's "friends" at his change of mood. You were more than pleased to know that this was a side of Draco that only you could experience.

"We had shopping to do." you explained. "But, we were just on our way back to Hogwarts."

"Empty-handed?" he wondered, giving you a suspicious look.

"You should tell him." your friend whispered in your ear.

“Tell me what?” you noticed his brow furrowing. You didn't want Draco to know what happened, you weren't a little girl who needed his protection, but it was already too late.

“Could you at least buy me a butterbeer?” you sighed a little wearily at the number of events that had happened in such a short time.

Your friend took that proposal as a sign to get back on her way. She didn't want to come between the lovebirds. As for Crabbe and Goyle, all it took was a "Disappear" from the blond and within seconds it was just the two of you.

"You should be nicer to them," you smiled as you realised how childish Draco could be sometimes. He was so eager for you two to be alone that he didn't even bother to hide it.

"They're used to it." he defended himself as he took you by the hand and led you in the direction of The Three Broomsticks. You intertwined your fingers with his and let yourself be swept away with an idiotic grin on your face.

For a few seconds you regretted your request. There, in those snowy streets, it was just you, Draco, and the feeling that the world belonged to you and the slytherin alone. You didn't want it to end.

He sensed your body's resistance and turned to you. He caught you in his arms, grabbing your chin and forced you to look at him. His cheeks were red with cold, his eyes tinged with worry and fear...

"Have you had enough of me?" he asked bitterly. You blinked in confusion, what the hell was he talking about? You cupped his cheeks with your hands, making him shiver with the warmth you radiated.

“As if that were possible... “ you whispered, looking him in the eyes, to make your message clear. You had never been aware of how lonely Draco felt until you started dating him, but what broke your heart the most was seeing how he was ready for you to leave him at any moment. “It is you, Draco Malfoy, who will not get rid of me so easily.” you threatened him.

Without you expecting it he wrapped his arms around you and hugged you as if his soul went into it. If you didn't know how proud the Slytherin could be you would swear that for a second you saw a tear fall down his cheek, but trapped against his chest, you couldn't see anything, only feel Draco's heartbeat thundering against your whole body.

“If we stay here much longer we'll freeze, and I don't want you to blame me if you catch a cold.” He broke the embrace and without waiting for a response, he took you by the hand and led you to The Three Broomsticks. Someone had suddenly become shy and you couldn't help but smile.

Once there, finally with a butterbeer in your hand, he forced you to tell him what had happened to you before you met. The Slytherin had too good a memory to forget the incident. You explained to him, somewhat embarrassed, how you had completely forgotten to buy a dress for the Yule Ball and how the only thing you could find in the shop had been taken from you by a group of Slytherins.

“y/n, tell me who they are and I swear they won't dare show their faces in front of you ever again.” The knuckles of his hand turned white and his body language adopted his father's gestures.

“Don't even think about it.” you tried to calm him by taking his hand and interlacing your fingers. "But..." you put a finger to his lips to shut him up. “I want all your attention on me, I don't want you to even think about them.” you interrupted him. Draco grinned slyly, every day he was more and more sure that he had found the right one.

“Don't worry sweetheart, you're already the only thing I think about all day long.” he confessed before kissing you, the taste of butterbeer intensified in your mouth accompanied by an overflowing warmth.

*writing in my diary using a glitter gel pen* I'm losing my sense of humanity

Birthright, George Abraham