I only saw you once, and I was already dreaming of you.
You only spoke to me once and I was already imagining your hand against mine.
You only greeted me once and in my mind wandered all the topics we could talk about.
And the more you talked to me the more I felt my mind wander through those scenarios.
And then anxiety would strike.
What if you only talked to me out of guilt?
What if you only said hello to me because you needed something in the end?
What if this is all just your way of getting something out of me?
Your way of manipulating me until I'm at your feet and do everything you tell me to do.
Your way of proving that I'll always let you walk all over me.
And then your message comes through and everything seems to cease to exist.
The anxiety, the imaginary scenarios.
Am I falling in love with you or with the illusion?
The one I like because it makes me feel good.
It makes me feel that I'm finally worth something.
That I'm not just one more in the system.
And then you ask me to help you with something.
You ask me to do homework together and I don't refuse because finally having someone else's company makes me feel good.
But the same thought comes back to my mind.
I imagine again the pain of rejection.
What will my life be like once you stop talking to me?
And if you hear those rumors from people, what will you think of me?
Will you stop talking to me or pretend you never heard them?
Or will you accept them and tell me to my face what a shitty person I am? And you'll leave and I'll be the same as in the beginning, alone.
Cold in my professions and in my friendships.
Modifying a little bit Hamilton's famous line.
And like him, pretending to give minimal importance to personal relationships.
Trying to keep myself free of any particular attachment.
And keep my happiness independent of the caprices of others.
If you ever leave I'll again be wondering when a person will come along who will truly stay with me.
I will be called manipulative at the end of this text
But believe me that midnight is when I become the most sincere.
Because my mind is so weak that it doesn't rest.
And I think about it so much that I don't sleep peacefully.
And I hope that after all this if you ever find out who wrote this, and that it was meant for you, don't leave.
Stay and assure me that you will never leave.
Just make me believe for a few seconds that I am no longer alone.
And let me see you one more time
Midnight Thoughts
The view from my window
A nice sketch I made
Assana/Shade: can you recommend to me any books that made you cry?
James/Blackbird: general mathematics 6th edition
I need to clarify a few things about my last four pots and the future of this blog.
In reality, I only posted two different things, translating them into English. These posts do not form part of any of my stories.
Currently, I only have two stories published here, being the ones tied to my oc's from DC comic's
There's another one that I've intended to translate and post, but my time has not been right, and I haven't posted it. But the title is already on my list of "Stories on this blog" or something like that. I don't remember the title of that post.
The things I published today, along with a few stories of mine with the length of one or two chapters, will be labeled as "Independent mini-stories", including some of my ideas and stories I write for school.
I say this because last weekend I wrote a story for my philosophy class and my teacher liked it.
As you may have noticed "Princess of Gotham" will be on an indefinite hiatus because my main focus at the moment is "Terrors of Gotham", a prequel to my first story.
The last thing I want to ask, to anyone who reads my works on this platform, is to have patience. I'm about to start my college admission tests. I also have other million things to do.
R.Cabrera
Chapter 3: Family
If I had ever been told I would have a huge room in one of the most luxurious mansions in the country, I would have thought it was silly.
But there I was, waking up at 8 a.m., cursing at the sounds of a dog trying to get into the room. But at the same time, I thanked him, I didn't want to continue with that nightmare. Sleepy, I got out of bed, dressed only in a sweatshirt and sleeping pants.
I looked in the mirror, noticing the drool stain on my face, my hair in knots, and the purple circles under my eyes. I was a mess.
I looked down from my tangle of hair to my eyes. My father's eyes. Green, with those golden sparkles. I looked away, grabbing a lock of my hair, thinking about cutting it again.
Although my hair wasn't as pretty, it reminded me of my mother, when she braided and brushed it. She always told me I had her hair. Straight, black and, back then, long, now it only reached my shoulders.
The noises of the dog made me remember why I had gotten out of bed. I quickly brushed my hair and slipped on some shoes. Jumping over the things I had left lying on the floor, I headed for the door.
"What do you want Titus?" I asked, looking down to get a better look at the black dog sitting right outside his door. "I'm not Damian or Tim. If you want to bother someone, bother your owner or his brother." I squatted down so I could pet the beautiful canine.
"Good morning Jane." Said Tim, with a nervous smile on his face, coming a little closer to my door. "Alfred sent me, breakfast is ready." he extended his hand to help me up, but I didn't take it.
"Hello, Jackson." I greeted, without looking at him. That wasn't the right time or place to talk about our problems, so I just said hello to my father's brother. And apparently, the dog noticed the tension of the moment because he turned to look at me and then tilted his head sideways. "I wanted to go out to the garden before breakfast," I said, starting to walk towards the huge stairs of the mansion.
"Come on, don't deny Alfred the special breakfast he made for you." Said Tim, looking at me as he walked beside me, trying to get me to look him in the face.
"I'm only going because I'm hungry and I didn't eat well last night." was all I answered, ending the conversation.
When we got to the dining room, Titus sat near the door to the kitchen, waiting for a bite to eat. Almost everyone was already seated along with the table. Richard, Olive, Rai, Jason, and Bruce. With half-eaten food on their plates.
I walked into the kitchen so I could wash my hands, there I met my favorite person.
"Good morning," Assana said, coming to my side with a plate of chopped fruit. "Did you fall asleep?" she asked, picking up a piece of strawberry with her fork and bringing it to my mouth.
"I had not slept well for a long time, I needed to rest." I lied and then turned to face her, taking the piece of fruit between my teeth.
I dried my hands and together we headed back to the dining room.
"Good morning Master Tim, Miss Jane, Miss Assana." Alfred greeted kindly as he poured more coffee for Bruce. "Shall I serve you breakfast?"
"If you don't mind." As Tim sat down between Olive and Damian, I jumped up to greet my favorite uncle.
"Finally, the family is back together again," Dick commented, releasing me from that big hug. "I want the four of you to join me on patrol one day," he said, pointing to his daughter, Tim, and me, oh and the little devil.
"You didn't say hello last night," Bruce said, turning to Jason and me, and then taking another sip of his coffee.
"I'm sorry, we were late and didn't want to bother you," I commented, then sat down between Assana and my father.
"Did you get up late too?" Olive asked, laughing a little when she saw Damian's sleepy face, who was helping Alfred with breakfast.
"I want to sleep," he said, "I hate Mondays.
"It's Saturday," said Jason taking the coffee from his older brother.
"I hate you," said Damian and Dick in unison.
A small argument between brothers broke out that morning, being quickly settled after Alfred served them all their respective breakfasts. As we ate, my cousin and I were assailed by several questions posed by the four Wayne brothers.
Next Part
Previous Part
How curious... Such a strange and delicate thing. Adrift in the waters of fate... Which way will you wander I wonder?
—The High Priestess (The Arcana)
Vesuvia from The Arcana
Part of my 5 color challenge. I tried to record my process while drawing this but my device is slow as f****, so no speedpaint for now.
Life and Death
Stephanie: Bet you guys can't make a sentence without the letter "a".
Jason, resident english nerd: You thought you did something there,didn't you? Well,sorry to burst your bubble but numerous sentences could be constructed without employing the first letter of the english lexicon.
Stephanie: Fuck you, zombie boy.
HELP
I'm trying to star with all this magic stuff but I don't really know how to start and don't really believe on Google articles on my language (Spanish). I can't go to markets, stores, library's to buy crystals, candles, books, and my mom is against online shopping, so...
How can I start with simple things?
I know, is a stupid question
And sorry, as I said, I'm not a native English speaker.
Creativity weighs on me.
So many ideas awaken that I can't put into practice.
And I shape half-formed ideas that never get any further.
I feel heavy.
With so many ideas and so little ability.
I need time and organization.
Sometimes I feel I have all the time in the world.
But other times I feel like everything is coming at me
I have so much on my mind and so little time.
I want to do everything and at the same time, I can't do anything.
Even if inspiration wanders through my mind I can't express it.
Doubts assail my head.
They answer themselves or just die there.
Inspiration comes to me daily.
And at all hours.
she/they 20 years. This blog is a mess of a lot of things. Roch's personal Blog
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