r-cabrera

Latest Posts by r-cabrera

I had a breakdown, and I'm not writing it here so I can take your pity, it won't solve my life my passing problems, or even my undiagnosed depression. I'm here only to vent because I have no one to talk to and I feel like the more I keep it in the faster I will explode.

I had a breakdown, i started crying in the middle of my mom's living room, realizing how different I was from when I left this home two years ago, and suddenly, everything started to feel more real.

I cried the tears I had kept hidden behind my eyelids back when I had to apologize to my supposed friends for being bad at jokes, for acting cold with them, for being dramatic, for being too much, for being who I am and who I thought I had lost back in those two years of seclusion. I had to embarrass myself, to beg for a little attention from them because it seemed like they fed from it. They enjoyed ignoring me just so I could go crawling back to them. I apologized for not being able to be handled with.

Every single day I come to realize just how narcissistic they have been, how much they've broken me. How many things do I have to suffer to keep calling them my friends?

First and time I apologize for being myself, especially to people who joke about suicide every single day

Brain dump of today because I've been having a shitty week

Since some time ago, I've been feeling like my friends always ignore me, make fun of me, or try to get something from me (gifts, money, food, class notes, others stuff)

To set some examples: on Tuesday, one of them took a photo of me when i wasn't looking, edited it, and posted it online as a meme. On any other time, I would've laughed, but I was already in a bad mood, so when she told me, "Is it noticeable that I'm bored?" I couldn't even fake laugh and answered "Yes, and a lot" in the most annoyed voice I have ever heard from myself.

I was so mad at her for posting it. But j think it was a mistake from my part because I didn't telk her to stop, so I think she believes she didn't do anything wrong.

On Wednesday, I skipped classes so i could do son stuff at home. i didn't tell them I wasn't going until one of them (not the picture girl, the other one) asked if I was going, like an hour and a half after class started.

Yesterday, Thursday, they asked me to buy some stuff for a model we were going to photograph, but I didn't know what to buy. So I asked them before arriving at school. But they didn't answer, I kept asking until "message girl" told me "idk" so I answered, "I don't think they have that at the store, but I'll ask" I ended up buying a juice, a bottle of water and some chocolates. But j still was mad because they had already bought a juice and some cheetos. They haven't payed me, but meh.

A lot has happened, but i just needed to vent

OFFICIAL BOOP POST you are more than welcome to boop me as much as you want and I will boop back. RB if you want some boops!!

I think, then I get sad, then the motivation flies away. Then I think again, and start doing something, just so my mind can tell me it's horrible. Why am I even doing it? Then I think, and I get sad, and the cycle repeats

I don't know why I always remember those moments... Am I still afraid of having a couple? Am I sacred of telling them I'm demi or asexual? Am I actually sacred of even thinking about having a couple?

I don't know, I only only want to erase those moments. I want to give me a chance or the person that likes me. But im scared that those things can happen again, even with totally different people.

I don't know why I have the luck that every person I get to have genuine interest in ends up being shit at the end.

I'm scared to like someone because they might end like the others.

Why am I scared of someone having a crush on me? What is it impossible for me to believe that something like that can happen?

Why am I scared of even thinking about a kiss? There's nothing wrong with it, but why am I scared?

A little poem, or brain dump poem, that one of my friends wrote and gave me authorization to publish here

The view from my window

A nice sketch I made

The moment you realized everything you do is worthless. That your friends already did it, so if you do it, it's just a copy, stealing an idea.

The moment you realize you really have no talent, no amazing thing about yourself that you can show everyone, while your friends all always say how amazing the other friend is.

The moment you realize you'll never achieve your goals because you need to be good at something you're not, because you lack an ability, because the more you try to learn, the more you get tired of even trying.

Mi buena amiga escribió un libro, se está publicando en Wattpad por el momento.

Se llama Helio. Denle apoyo plis. Les dejó el link

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

My good friend wrote a book, it's being published on Wattpad for the moment.

It's called Helio, give it love please. For the moment, it's only on Spanish. I leave you the link

https://www.wattpad.com/story/371509053?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=Rochely1702

Even though I have new friends i still alone sometimes. Things that happen

On other news I have the autograph of a Mexican movie director. Sooo... Good week (?

Our last names are very similar. He gave a masterclass on my school. Search him up it's Carlos Carrera

Por favor no sean alegóricos a decir gracias, hola, adiós, como estas. Se ven mal si no lo hacen, es decencia humana.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk

"If you don't think you can fight all your problems, you're not hitting them hard enough." -Jason Todd probably

This is the Dumbledore we should've had and we missed:

A Dumbledore that should've been an example and a father figure for the students.

A Dumbledore that fights for the injustice of the Wizarding World. The discrimination against muggleborns. Someone who never lets kids fight a war that isn't up to them. But lets them fight for their rights and their opinions.

Someone that understands kids and teens and their needs according to their age. Someone that has fun when he needs to have fun. And also someone who is an authority and scolds when he needs to scold.

Imagine a Dumbledore that is friends with James Potter and encourages him to change and grow up from his immature self. To realize what it is important in life. To try to gain Lily's love by showing her his true self. Not by showing up.

Imagine Dumbledore being a parent figure for Sirius. Letting him know there is nothing wrong with him if he is different from his family. Being a gay guru for him and helping him realize his feelings for Remus. But making sure he doesn't lose himself for love just like he did for Grindelwald.

And imagine him helping queer youth, because he is queer himself.

Imagine a Dumbledore giving Remus confidence. Letting him know that he is not a monster and he deserves happiness and love. Asking him how he is every month. Inviting him for tea and distracting him around the full moon. And with his power, helping him destroy the prejudices people have of werewolves and doing the impossible to change the law against them.

Imagine a Dumbledore making Peter be more sure of himself. Encouraging him to study, letting him know that he is not stupid, that he just needs a bit more effort to learn. Making sure he is not sad about feeling alone or being scared about the war. Because he is the most vulnerable of the Marauders. Making sure Peter knows his friends love him no matter what.

Imagine a Dumbledore that helps kids that are lost, or are forced to take the wrong side. Not by punishing them but by helping them realize their beliefs are wrong or they are more than their pureblood families. Like Regulus, or Barty.

Imagine a Dumbledore that doesn't discriminates muggleborns. In fact, he gives them more importance and love, to demonstrate that they deserve attention as well. And a Dumbledore that gets angry and wild when an injustice occurs.

Imagine a Dumbledore that is Minnie's best friend. Someone that not only cares for her and the rest of the teachers as staff. But as human beings. Someone that understands their personal problems. Imagine Dumbledore helping Minnie realize she deserves a happy ending as well, no matter how much she had suffered. And how much she had lost. Perhaps helping her encounter her past loves again.

Just imagine Dumbledore going against the Magic Government and annoying parents who want to keep the school a conservative elite pureblood place. But tries to transform it into a respectful school for anyone no matter their blood status or skin color or religion or sexual orientation.

Dumbledore should've been a Godfather that is always for students, teachers and staff no matter what. That helps when he is needed. Someone in who people should trust. Students should've loved him as a father. And Dumbledore should've loved the students as his own kids.

Dumbledore shouldn't have been someone that manipulates people. Not someone that gives a false image of himself. Not a selfish asshole that only thought about winning a war. Not someone that used everyone as a pawn in a larger game.

I think Dumbledore had the potential to be a king, a saviour, a role model, a real hero. But he wasn't. He just tricked everyone but he was a coward.

Troubled Romantic who is Heir to a Great Fortune (yes please, i need the money)

For anyone who’s ever wondered who they’d be in a 19th century novel

The wait is over: 19th Century Character Trope Generator

I'm "Meddlesome Bachelor with 2,000 pounds a year" yes please sign me up

How curious... Such a strange and delicate thing. Adrift in the waters of fate... Which way will you wander I wonder?

—The High Priestess (The Arcana)

Vesuvia from The Arcana

Part of my 5 color challenge. I tried to record my process while drawing this but my device is slow as f****, so no speedpaint for now.

A little challenge I made for myself. I am trying to make drawings using only five colors that I take out from a color palette online and mix them to create new ones for lights and shadows.

This is a character (?) for my new story Coffee, plants and Butter Toffees.

This is the cutest thing I've seen today

Shut up Dan mora drawing Tim covers but they’re homages to Dick and Jason’s debut as robin respectively is so cute☹️

So, as I'm not doing my writing stuff here (except for quick poems), I think the correct thing would be to introduce myself

My name is Rochely or Roch for short. I'm 20 years old

I go by she/they pronouns. And I'm bisexual

I'm originally from the US but I moved to Mexico when I was little

I like to write, paint, and take photos, and I enjoy learning astronomical and astrological stuff. I also study grapfic design

My birth chart is something like:

Sun in Aquarius, Rising in Virgo and Moon in Capricorn.

I just want a partner that can understand me and all the stuff I talk about

LGBTQ+ is accepted in this blog

I constantly post random stuff, from art, to batfam, to history and more.

I'm brain dumping here mainly and on my Threads account. I'll link it later.

I use two Instagram accounts, a personal and my design stuff, also linked

For my writing stuff (the novels), you can visit my other blog @rochs-c

Thus was one of the best tarot readings I've had in my entire life. Very recommended

Free Tarot Reading

I am doing free tarot readings!

If you are interested, just comment down below or send me a message with your birthday, your full name or your initials and of course the question you have.

I am looking forward to help you.

moonschildtarot

Remember that the universe will always bring the best to you. Open your heart and listen to the message it wants to give you.

I NEED HELP

So, the other day I was talking to a friend of mine and I said "sometimes I would like to rewrite the Harry Potter universe and make it a little more logical," and I regret that. Because now I hace the idea of making my own magical universe.

I have a goggle doc in which I am writing the basics of the story, my world building and some character sheets. I also added a few designs of uniforms for the school and now I'm working on my Villain design (because is the arc that has the most develop until know)

Now, I may have my basics but I'm still missing a lot. If someone would like to help in character design, reviewing and beta reading the story, helping with new concepts for the world building or even helping with the designs of places in this universe you can send me a dm and I will send you the Google doc. For now I only have de doc in Spanish but I can translate it to English.

Thank you in advance

I literally just realize something

So, my parents are from de 60's meaning that if they went to Hogwarts, they could have met the marauders. You follow me till this point? Ok

On the other hand (and yes, this might reveal my age, but meh) if I went to Hogwarts, I should have been in the same year as James Sirius Potter

Like, wtf, this was why at the beginning I thought James and Lily were too young to have kids

So yeah, that was it, just my usual mightnight thoughts

Jajaj, the funny thing is that I even organized everything and I haven't even published anything

Masterlist of Stories in this blog

Princess of Gotham

Terrors of Gotham

Betrayal in the Shadows

I mean, for me it's a yes.

But I think in canon Remus had the potion (really don't remember the name) that kept him conscious during his transformation, so he should have remembered that. Maybe he did remember and just kept silent.

But once again, for me it's a yes.

so, i've got a question: when Remus lupin was teaching at Hogwarts and went on full werewolf on full moon, did Sirius black accompanied him like old times in his animagus form?

Please say yes

I mean, there are a lot of people saying they want to help (including me). We can totally start it with a little organization

I'm just saying

there should be an AmRev webtoon

Do it! Do it! Do it!

The Señora urge to make caldo de res when is hot as hell outside 😔 why are we like this??

Sometimes, I wish you'd make me cry. Sometimes, I wish that we could fight. Tell me, don't you hate it? Perfect's overrated. Tell the nice guy to give me a taste of my medicine. I wish you'd make me cry —Wish you'd make me cry https://www.instagram.com/p/CbqEjsgvygG/?utm_medium=tumblr

Batman spoilers

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BRUCE WAYNE IS BATMAN???????!!!!!!!???!!!??!!!!?!

Clarifying

I need to clarify a few things about my last four pots and the future of this blog.

In reality, I only posted two different things, translating them into English. These posts do not form part of any of my stories.

Currently, I only have two stories published here, being the ones tied to my oc's from DC comic's

There's another one that I've intended to translate and post, but my time has not been right, and I haven't posted it. But the title is already on my list of "Stories on this blog" or something like that. I don't remember the title of that post.

The things I published today, along with a few stories of mine with the length of one or two chapters, will be labeled as "Independent mini-stories", including some of my ideas and stories I write for school.

I say this because last weekend I wrote a story for my philosophy class and my teacher liked it.

As you may have noticed "Princess of Gotham" will be on an indefinite hiatus because my main focus at the moment is "Terrors of Gotham", a prequel to my first story.

The last thing I want to ask, to anyone who reads my works on this platform, is to have patience. I'm about to start my college admission tests. I also have other million things to do.

R.Cabrera

Inspiration

Creativity weighs on me.

So many ideas awaken that I can't put into practice.

And I shape half-formed ideas that never get any further.

I feel heavy.

With so many ideas and so little ability.

I need time and organization.

Sometimes I feel I have all the time in the world.

But other times I feel like everything is coming at me

I have so much on my mind and so little time.

I want to do everything and at the same time, I can't do anything.

Even if inspiration wanders through my mind I can't express it.

Doubts assail my head.

They answer themselves or just die there.

Inspiration comes to me daily.

And at all hours.

Inspiración

La creatividad me pesa.

Despiertan tantas ideas que no puedo plasmar.

Y plasmo ideas a medias que nunca llegaron a mas.

Me siento pesada.

Con tantas ideas y tan poca habilidad.

Necesito tiempo y organización.

En ocasiones siento que tengo todo el tiempo del mundo

Pero otras siento que todo se me viene encima

Tengo tanto en la cabeza y tan poco tiempo.

Quiero hacerlo todo y a la vez no puedo hacer nada

Incluso si la inspiración vaga por mi mente no puedo expresarlo

Las dudas asaltan mi cabeza.

Se responden solas o simplemente mueren ahí.

La inspiración me llega diario.

Y a todas horas.