Venting And Oversharing To The Void For A Sec:

i think i just need a different favorite person because this one is just not the fucking move

when richard siken said "love, for you, is larger than the usual romantic love. it's like a religion. it's terrifying. no one will ever want to sleep with you" and when halsey said "'why do you need love so badly? bet it's because of her daddy, bet that she'll never be happy' I bet that you're right and I'll show you in time cause I sabotage the things I love the most" and when emily burns said "tongue-tied, screaming on the inside, when I say that we broke up and they ask why. Are you crying in the shower like a freak, or is it just me?" and when maisie peters said "all the hows and the whens and whys I thought it would be us for life" and when lauren jauregui said "she doesn't let me have control anymore, I must have crossed a line, I must have lost my mind" and when hozier said "i think of loss and I can only think of you" and when-

being aware that your behavior is shaped by childhood experiences is so cringe every time i notice it im like ooo look at her can't even get over what someone told him when she was 7. grow up

i cant even write about it, i tried, too many memories of being locked up in facilities. i know everything is all in that damn notebook but i don’t know if i dare look at it.

being “considerate of your bpd” my ASS, no improvement whatsoever, no regard for changing plans multiple times,, he just doesn’t fucking care it’s ridiculous like dez literally thinks we might have to break up and i’m thinking she could be right

how do you cope with being everything you’ve ever feared?

i hate how i am rotten from the inside out as a person. why can’t i get it right? why can’t i figure it out? why can’t i change to be enough?

things can't be different unless you make them different. I just put a post out there trying to make friends, and I trust in my Gods and the Universe to guide me to where I need to be.

The people who are supposed to be around me will be, and I will be the white swan.

positive change people, positive change.

i wish things could be different,

i’m obviously sad how hard would it be to say you love me, or maybe try sending something to cheer me up? anything?