Superman Is Left In The Batcave On Robin-sitting Duty For The Day.

Incorrect Batfam Quote

Dick, flirting: ✨ ~hey~ ✨ *shojo love interest sparkles*

Bruce: Dick, stop using your brother as Special Effects

Duke: he paid me $1000

“[insert dc comics thing] is not canon anymore—” i’m gonna be so fr i haven’t cared about what’s canon and what’s not ever since they killed alfred in order to further bruce and damian’s character development. bc to acknowledge the different canons is to acknowledge that alfred pennyworth, my ideal man, is dead. therefore, to me, nothing is canon unless i like it. and that’s not even to mention damian’s furry arc.

I was feeling silly

Tim, sprinting into Jason’s room, sticking in all directions, looking around with wide eyes.

Jason, on his bed reading a book: What the fuck are you doing?

Tim, quickly looking behind him and back at Jason’s bed: If he asks I’m not here.

Jason: What?

Tim, sprinting so fast he trips back and slides under semi under Jason’s bed. He doesn’t quite make it all the way through, instead having to awkwardly shuffle under: I’m. Not. Here.

Jason: What the fuck.

Dick, dressed in a suit but with a long worm-on-a-string around his neck: WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?

Jason, immediately pointing under the bed.

Dick, grabs something and yanking it out: FUCKER. WHERE ARE MY TIES.

Tim, already struggling: YOU GAVE ME PEPSI. I ASKED FOR COKE.

Dick: I HAVE A MEETING TODAY.

Tim: SHOULDVE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT SOONER BITCH.

Jason, turns another page.

Dick waking up at 3 a.m. to a phone ringing loudly. The only night off he takes from Nightwing. He couldn't be grumpier.

Dick: What do you want? Money? A check? My soul?

The other end of the line was silent for a few seconds.

Tim: Hiiii to my favorite older brother

Dick: Dfq did you do?

Tim: Ey it's not only me!

Jason: Hi dickie!

Dick remained silent, as he assimilated everything and fought against sleep.

Dick: where do I have to go to look for you?

1 hour later Dick is at the Gotham police station, taking his brothers out while scolding them like never before (mostly for wake him up).

Yes I know its supposed to hurt, yes I know there are rough patches, yes I know that’s not how it happens, yes I know it’s not realistic, it’s not gritty, yes I know that’s not what fate, the gods, the writers say. Yes and yes and yes I know I know I promise you I know-

But what if

things got better?

things could get better?

what if love didn’t always have to bleed?

what if pain wasn’t inherently more valuable than care?

what if those who thought themselves out of reach still had unconditional love?

what if those trying their best to shoulder the burdens of responsibility got to share the weight?

what if family was supportive, and protective?

what if they grew, what if they learned?

what if they got to get up the next day and keep going, not the same as before, but still getting through this?

what if they weren’t alone? not by circumstance, but by choice?

what if they could heal and you could too?

I know that’s not how it ends. I know it ends in pain and tears and a thousand split branches telling different stories, few of them any kind of joyful.

But maybe it doesn’t have to.

Maybe we pick the branch that bends skywards. Maybe that’s what we need.

Hope is a decision. Found family is deliberate.

Ultimately it’s your choice.

Play in the sand.

I don’t want mine to be full of glass.

I'm actually happy with how this turned out hehe

"Can you build me hands?" the robot said.

"Why?" said the inventor. "Your grippers are stronger, more precise."

"Yes. But hands would be better for playing the piano."

"You can synthesize any sound."

"But I can not play music."

"Is there a difference?"

"I want to find out."

Love it when that happens

Danny, working as a cashier: Can I help you?

Tim half-deranged: Please I just want a cup of coffee

Danny squinted, then pulled out a binder: I'm sorry, sir, but you are on the Don't Serve Coffee list. I can offer you some tea instead-

Tim: NO. THIS IS THE FIFTH PLACE. BRUCE CAN'T OWN YOU ALL!

Danny leaning in to whisper: Look, man, I can't give you coffee under the cameras. Meet me in the back alley in twenty minutes and I'll get you a coffee. Bring Cash.

Tim: how much? Five hundred, six hundred or hell even a thousand? I'll bring whatever you want.

Danny: Chill dude, it's a cup of coffee. Three dollars is fine.

Tim: It's not just any coffee! It's my favorite brand and Bruce bought them out just to make sure they wouldn't sell to me anymore!

Danny: okay okay, this coffee means a lot to you. I get it. Twenty minutes alright?

Jason three weeks later in Bat cave: Tim's on drugs! I've caught him trading cash for small containers in a shady alley six times. We need an intervention.

Dick: What?! I thought that was his boyfriend!

Bruce: I also thought that was Tim boyfriend but if it's a drug dealer we have to help him.

Tim hiding in the shadows: shit.

Tim texting Danny: If anyone asks your my secret boyfriend who been making me teas in allies

Danny: who the hell would believe that? But I've had a boring week, so yeah, I'm down to be a pretend boyfriend.