I’ve Made A Few Posts About Wanting A Fic From The Pov Of The Fbi Agents That Have To Monitor The Party

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

Everyone thinks Dick is a rule follower cause of the way he speaks, but his actions prove otherwise. Like I feel like he always says “that plan is insane we can’t do it” and then just turns around and does it himself but convinces himself it’s all good cause out loud he said it. Like he’s all “we have to listen to Bruce, he’s right” while he’s sneaking out with the batmobile.

I feel like jason would be the one to recommend books to damian

And not any classical/non-fiction stuff, as the kid had already read that kind of stuff, but his favorites from when he himself was a kid

the outsiders; that one got jason a knife thrown at him from a red-eyed 12 year old… who then proceeded to sit down and talk with jason for hours about the book, and a few nights later they watch the movie

jason was going to be gone for a month, an outlaws thing, and decided to give the kid a series to start going through, percy jackson. by the time jason comes back, the kid just shoves a notebook in his hands. damian had written detailed notes, when there was misinformation, and of course; why he loved certain parts. they spend a few hours discussing again. over the next week the watch the movies. ‘what was that abomination?! if i hadn’t read the books it would be… okay i suppose.., but it’s not book accurate’ and then the TV show, ‘tt, better than the movies’

the giver; jason read this one WITH damian, remembering that he loved the book, but not much else of it. they would sit for some time before and after patrol reading together to unwind, which lead to finishing the book quickly, and then watching the movie. ‘why is there a film for everything?’ ‘fine we’ll turn it off-’ ‘that’s not what i said! don’t!!’

jason felt his heart swell when he came to his room and found the first three books to the series of unfortunate events. which has been on his list but he’s been a bit busy with yk, being dead and the trauma after yada yada yada, jason’s trying not to dwell on that part too much

he was just really happy with having time to just read and enjoy himself again, especially with his little brother

a comic about different types of storytellers

people don't talk enough about how fucking funny it is that bruce can sub in his kids as batman when he's too busy. like can you imagine it from the league's perspective? imagine you have this really mysterious, geniusly scary guy that you know next to nothing about, never cracks a smile and yet always comes out on top, and one day he shows up to a league meeting and there's just something... off. about him.

you can't pin it down because he's literally acting exactly the same as usual and there's no reason to think there's anything wrong, but maybe he shifted in his seat one to many times, or he looked just a tad bit too bored during green lantern's case review, but something's just... odd. so you quietly ask superman after the meeting if anything's up with the bat bcs you know those two are closer and also clark can hear heartbeats so if something's wrong surely he'll pick it up? and without hesitation he leans over to you and mumbles 'yeah batman was busy, that's his 17 yr old son. he's a crime lord and kills people sometimes though so we're not allowed to let him into the weapons department.' and then walks away like it's normal.

like the whiplash the league must go through every time they realise that no, this is not their fearless dark and brooding leader, this is in fact one of his dipshit kids being forced to sub in bcs the real batman broke an ankle, is incredible.

wonder woman: so that's my proposed plan, what are your thoughts batman?

batman: hn. i think that- *voice raising two octaves* oh shit hold on my phones buzzing

the league:

batman, answering the phone and immediately dropping the Bat Posture™: what do you mean- aw come on little wing that's not fair! but- no, NO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ALFRED I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU- IM SORRY OK I'LL BUY YOU MORE- *catches sight of the league watching him, baffled* *stiffens* ok listen i promise to replace them but i gotta go, please show me mercy iloveyoubye *hangs up*

the league:

batman:

batman: *coughs awkwardly*

superman: *sighs*

batman, to superman: ...red hood found out i ate his chocolate pretzels-

superman, shaking his head: just... just stop.

the flash: so this isn't batman either, is it?

wonder woman: if this one's also a criminal im losing my mind.

superman, tiredly: no no, this one isn't a criminal. this one's actually a cop.

batman: *sinks down in his seat* b's gonna kill me

green lantern, mystified: where does he keep GETTING you all from!?

'batman' dick, who made a pact with jason to Always Fuck With Bruce Whenever The Opportunity Arises: batman is a whore.

they think they've finally sussed out all 2 of batman's kids and then one day during a meeting 'batman' ends up on a 30 minute rant about different hacking methods this tech villain could be using that results in him half way through a sentence breaking off to say '-oh uncle clark could you pass me that pen- thanks, anyway so-' and then five minutes after that when the league have all been exchanging incredulous looks he finally freezes and is like. SHIT.

wonder woman: you're different from the other two, aren't you?

batman: maybe i am maybe i'm not, you can't prove it.

wonder woman:

green lantern: so like, are you new or have you just managed to avoid sub duty up until now?

superman, coughing: actually, this is this ones ninth occasion of replacing batman. you've just never realised before.

the league:

batman: yeah actually the other two are kinda mad i lasted longer than them...

the flash: how the fuck does he keep getting kids with the exact same build as him!??!?

'batman' tim, spent 20 minutes padding the suit out so he would look the part, still mad that bruce keeps palming WE work off on him: oh he forces us to take steroids for it.

the league, concerned:

superman, pinching the bridge of his nose: now come on red robin-

batman, fully tearing up and looking distraught: PLEASE uncle clark, it HURTS, you can't keep COVERING FOR HIM!

superman, frantically to the league: this one lies.

bonus

the league, squinting at batman:

the league: ...

superman: *head in his hands, too disappointed to do anything*

the league: *silently exchanging looks, wondering if anybody's brave enough to say anything*

duke as batman, fully aware this is fucking stupid but jason and tim fell on the floor laughing when dick came up with the idea and frankly, he wanted to see if anybody would have to guts to call him out: so, are we all ready to start the meeting?

silly little thing for my @steddiebingo prompt: nerds | 758 words | T |

"Hey, maybe he can help," Robin says, sweeping a hand towards Dustin who's just walked into Family Video for his regularly scheduled afterschool bug Steve and Robin time, interrupting their conversation.

"Oh come on." Steve shakes his head. "The kid doesn't want to hear about my trash heap of a love life."

"Oh, no, I absolutely want to hear about that." Dustin perks up at the opportunity to learn about Steve's trivial suffering.

"We're trying to figure out why Steve goes on a million dates but can't seem to find someone he actually likes," Robin fills Dustin in. "Tell him, Steve."

Steve groans, dragging his hands over his face before splaying them out sarcastically, as that's the only thing he can really do in protest right now. Dustin's looking at him expectantly, and Steve has no choice but to tell the kid all about Linda and Heidi and Brenda and Lucy and whoever else he's been out with recently, doing his best to answer any subsequent questions as PG as possible.

"Well of course you haven't found the one yet, you keep trying to date a bunch of normal, basic, girly girls. That's not your type," Dustin informs him once Steve's done talking.

Steve raises his eyebrows. "Oh, it isn't?"

"You can't really be that stupid, can you?"

"No, please, Henderson, enlighten me on what you think my type is."

"You're into nerds," he says like it's completely obvious.

Steve scoffs. "I am not into nerds. You know, just because I hang around you little weirdos all the time does not actually mean I want to hang around even more weirdos in all the other aspects of my life too."

"Seriously, Steve, think about it," Dustin argues. "Think of all the girls you've actually been really genuinely into in your life. They've all been nerds! Nancy-"

"- is not a nerd."

"She's a straight-A student and a journalism super geek. She's a nerd."

Steve rolls his eyes and sighs grudgingly. "Alright, fine, but-"

"And you were into Robin-"

Robin wrinkles her nose. "Ugh, don't remind me."

"-who you can't deny is definitely a nerd," Dustin continues.

"You know what, actually, he does have a point," Robin says.

Steve looks at her in betrayal. "Don't encourage him!"

"That girl you told me about that you liked in middle school who was super into Star Trek, and the other one who wanted to write a fantasy novel one day- oh and the elementary school crush who was always reading a new book every day..." Robin lists, ticking each one off on her fingers.

"I told you all that in confidence!"

"They were all nerds!"

"Exactly." Dustin grins, vindicated and insufferably smug. "Ergo, you, Steve Harrington, need to find yourself a nerd."

"I am not into nerds!" Steve protests hopelessly.

"What more proof do you need?" Dustin says. "You're into nerds."

"Totally into nerds," Robin concurs.

Steve huffs and throws up his hands. "Fine! I'll admit I'm into nerds if it will make you two shut up about it!"

Eddie happens to wander into the previously empty store at that exact moment, catching the tail end of the conversation as he approaches the counter. "What's all this about nerds?"

Steve freezes, glances Eddie over and stares at him strangely for a few long seconds. "Holy shit," he mutters.

His gaze cuts to Robin, whose eyes go wide when she meets his look. "Holy shit," she agrees.

"Oh my god."

"Oh my god."

"Dude."

"Dude!"

Eddie blinks at them. "Are you two having some sort of joint stroke or something?" He looks at Dustin as if the kid might have a better clue of what's going on. "Can you understand them?"

Dustin shrugs, equally mystified. "Don't look at me, man. They're weird."

The incomprehensible parroting conversation is still going on.

"Okay," Steve's saying, taking a deep breath in through his nose and exhaling determinedly.

"Okay?"

"Okay."

"Okay." Robin grins and shoves at his shoulder.

Steve finally turns back around and leans on the counter in front of Eddie with a classically charming smile. "So, Eddie, are you free on Saturday?"

Eddie smiles back despite his confusion. "Yeah-"

"Oh my god!" Dustin bursts out suddenly.

"Oh my god," Robin agrees with a knowing smirk.

Eddie glances at Dustin. "Oh no, not you too."

Steve exhales a long-suffering sigh and pushes himself off the counter, marching around to grab Eddie by the hand and drag him away from Dustin and Robin. "So. Saturday?"

"He's into nerds," Dustin whispers, wide-eyed.

Robin nods sagely. "He's into nerds."

In a universe where Damian was raised by Bruce since birth and never was told his siblings were adopted

Damian, age 12 helping unpacking things at Dicks new apartment: whos that?

Dick: Who?

Damian: That guy in the photo with you

Dick:

Dick: you mean- my dad? I never showed my parents to you?

Damian: there is no way thats our dad

Dick: our? Damian you- you know I’m adopted right?

Damian:

Dick:

Dick: we are all adopted, Damian.

Damian:

Damian: Even Cass?

Dick: you were there at her adoption.

Damian: I’m twelve! Probably didn’t payed attention to it.

Dick: you never asked yourself why do we don’t call Bruce ‘dad’?

Damian: I thought it was some petty teenager thing!

Dick: I’M 26!

Damian:

Damian: is Tim adopted?

Dick: yes?

Damian: knew it.

Tim, sprinting into Jason’s room, sticking in all directions, looking around with wide eyes.

Jason, on his bed reading a book: What the fuck are you doing?

Tim, quickly looking behind him and back at Jason’s bed: If he asks I’m not here.

Jason: What?

Tim, sprinting so fast he trips back and slides under semi under Jason’s bed. He doesn’t quite make it all the way through, instead having to awkwardly shuffle under: I’m. Not. Here.

Jason: What the fuck.

Dick, dressed in a suit but with a long worm-on-a-string around his neck: WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?

Jason, immediately pointing under the bed.

Dick, grabs something and yanking it out: FUCKER. WHERE ARE MY TIES.

Tim, already struggling: YOU GAVE ME PEPSI. I ASKED FOR COKE.

Dick: I HAVE A MEETING TODAY.

Tim: SHOULDVE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT SOONER BITCH.

Jason, turns another page.

Jason: “I’m NOTHING like Bruce, okay? We’re not even that similar. That’s all in your head.”

Dick, perched on Jason’s couch watching him gear up, sipping a Batburger shake: “so you’re NOT about to go deal with your emotions by going out on patrol and beating people up?”

Jason: *sets down the brass knuckles he was just holding* *stares off into the distance*

Jason: “These are just…for my — look, I don’t like your fucking tone, Richard.”

It’s a real shame that I will never watch YJ cartoon because I heard it’s quite good. HOWEVER I simply CANNOT forgive what this did to Kon and his costume.

You mean to tell me they thought the leather jacket, spikes on the shoulders, punk cool costume with sunglasses and an undercut was too out-there fashion for kids and teens?

SO THEY GAVE HIM A BORING T-SHIRT?????