Hey, Yeah So..

Ok so

I love Dís

I love how everyone has decided that she's the most competent Durin out of her family and has the Durin Brain cell whos not afraid of tell Thorin to fuck off and make fun of him

I love that for her

But

I think it would be really funny if she does lose all of that it when it comes to love

Which means....she gives bad courting advice

She boasts about how she manages to marry her One

But imagine her husband is the only one who knows how embarrassing bad it was but he loves her anyway so he didn't comment on it to not hurt her feelings and

Well

Now imagine this

Thorin comes to Dís for advice on how to court Bilbo cuz who else can he ask because she's the only one (aside from Gloin and he's not asking Gloin when he should have) who's married

She gives him advice of what she did for her late husband and he follows that

Cue to Bilbo being very very confused

I don’t know if this has been done but I thought it was funny.

once again thinking about hobbit/dwarf cultural differences and I really like the idea of dwarves being all about actions speaking louder than words and are very physically affectionate with their friends and family and more generally casual touch/contact is very normal to them

Bilbo finds this out very quickly with all the initial pats on the shoulder/arm/back, which turn into arms slung over his shoulders, hugs, head pats, and a lot of casual leaning into him whether seated or standing up, as well as the various times the dwarf nearest him will quickly grab him and/or put themselves between him and any perceived danger - they're a mighty protective bunch considering they've only known Bilbo a few months

He thinks he's used to how touchy dwarves are until Thorin grabs his hand one day to assist/drag him across a rocky path through a river, and Bilbo is just about having a conniption fit at the romantic implications (from a hobbit perspective) meanwhile Thorin thinks absolutely nothing of it because from a dwarven perspective he has no reason to

The Hobbit but Angst Bagginshield!

- [ ] Essentially a Deadpool Bilbo, but with s slower regeneration

Everything that could’ve gone wrong with Bilbo and the “adventure” Gandalf sent him on did, he had died numerous times with no one the wiser. It was only when Thorin, in his gold suck haze, threw Bilbo from the top of the wall did the rest of the company watch him die.

Gandalf, having grabbed his broken and bruised body, took him back to the Elvin camp. After some time he came back and briefly explained what/ how his powers worked and how they came to be. When what hobbit called the “fell winter” happened he was supposed to have died alongside his parents but awoke a week after they tried to flee across the brandybuck river.

Later he learns what became of the company following his demise, Thorin now broken out of his gold sick, had retreated further into the dark halls for what he’s done to his Amrâlimê, the others just sit in the dinning hall and wait for the hordes of goblins and orcs to take them.

Hearing this, Bilbo quickly dresses and marches from Dale to the stone wall he was thrown from two days prior. Using the rope he left on the side, he quickly scaled to the top and began the search for his dwarves and his missing king

Dwarves reactions to him still being alive

I imagine it happens during the battle when he saves Thorin, the princes, or Dwalin? Just keeping it the same as the movie.

I could also see Bilbo in all his self righteous nature being like, “I mean they already know I can’t die 🤷🏼‍♀️” and throws himself between Thorin and the white orcs blade.

Thorin and Bilbo can fix things and hold each other after the battle was won, just like the movie should have ended! 😂

The math is mathing

The original toxic yaoi

Thorin showing off every time Bilbo's around, but in a dwarfish manner and Bilbo is so confused why thorin keeps showing him gems he cut. He compliments him anyway and for the rest of the day Thorin is BEAMING

Kili and Fili's starter pack

Whoever says that holding your brother's hand is cringe is a tree shagger >:[

Also don't judge Kili's comb, he uses his brother's one anyway!

One of you asked for a royal nephews expansion pack for one of my bagginshield starter packs, so I hope this works too!

Fili be like