secret-fandom-stash

Latest Posts by secret-fandom-stash

Thinking about bagginshield and how Hobbits don't really have kings, they have a Thrain, sure (I think that's how it's spelt) but that's not a king

That's just sort of the guy who gives a second opinion and helps them organise things

But I imagine that to a dwarf, that's who they'd consider the Hobbit king

And so I'm thinking about the company finding out how Bilbo is the Thrain's grandson and them all immediately being concerned about how Thorin had been treating the Hobbit "prince" the first few months of the adventure and "oh no, does the Hobbit King know that King Thorin has been dallying with their prince? What about the marriage contracts? We haven't made any peace treaties! We stole their prince! Is there gonna be a war from this?!" (Their only example of Hobbits has been Bilbo "I will stab an Ork Warg for you despite the fact you hate me" Baggins, they don't know Bilbo is an outlier among even the Tooks) (Or the fact that Hobbits are a little... promiscuous in nature and that there was probably none of Bilbo's virtue left for Thorin to sully, it's most likely the other way around)

#virginThorinSupremacy

Anyway, I just think it'd be a little funny for them to find out that Bilbo is kind of high up in the social standings of Hobbits

Whenever I read fanfic about Thorin getting sooo angry at Kili for wanting to marry Tauriel I cant help but picture Fili talking to his uncle one-on-one and telling him “you do realize as soon as I’m king I’ll let them get married right 😐 you’re only delaying the inevitable you know that right 😐”

i love it when there’s a gay couple oblivious to the other’s affection and their third wheel who wants nothing more than to call them a homophobic slur

I just joined the fandom, am I on the right track?

Hey, yeah so..

Enjoy this thing I made 😎

Sooo SPIES IN DISGUISE IN 2024 😭😭

I had a dumb thought (x)

I’m sorry but how am I supposed to not love the “Frodo is a Bagginshield baby” headcanon when info like this exists??

I’m supposed to believe Frodo with the raven black hair, slightly advanced height, and crystal blue “don’t touch my gold or I’ll kill you” eyes isn’t the son of Thorin Oakenshield?? ?

once again thinking about hobbit/dwarf cultural differences and I really like the idea of dwarves being all about actions speaking louder than words and are very physically affectionate with their friends and family and more generally casual touch/contact is very normal to them

Bilbo finds this out very quickly with all the initial pats on the shoulder/arm/back, which turn into arms slung over his shoulders, hugs, head pats, and a lot of casual leaning into him whether seated or standing up, as well as the various times the dwarf nearest him will quickly grab him and/or put themselves between him and any perceived danger - they're a mighty protective bunch considering they've only known Bilbo a few months

He thinks he's used to how touchy dwarves are until Thorin grabs his hand one day to assist/drag him across a rocky path through a river, and Bilbo is just about having a conniption fit at the romantic implications (from a hobbit perspective) meanwhile Thorin thinks absolutely nothing of it because from a dwarven perspective he has no reason to

This is the worst timeline. (x)

Bagginshield is for LOVERS, Thorinduil is for SLUTS

Kili and Fili's starter pack

Whoever says that holding your brother's hand is cringe is a tree shagger >:[

Also don't judge Kili's comb, he uses his brother's one anyway!

One of you asked for a royal nephews expansion pack for one of my bagginshield starter packs, so I hope this works too!

Fili be like

The original toxic yaoi

Matt Murdock’s little :[ frown has Kermit face scrunch energy, don’t change my mind about this

Bonus pictures with same energy:

[ID in alt text]

i offer some silly nwalin in these trying times

Thorin told his bestie who his crush is...

Based on this post

I need Kili to be considered kind of a weirdo by dwarven standards - bro doesn't have any beads or braids in his hair, bro uses a bow and arrow as his favoured weapon, bros got a shit beard even for someone his age, bros got the hots for elves - he's just a weird little guy but he's very loved regardless and Fili is very protective of him cos yeah he's sort of strange but that's my little brother I'll kill you if you start talking shit

Please like this I worked on it all week

Arthur: Okay, so you're my servant now. It's not really that important of a position, just like, idk, make sure you bring me my breakfast on time

Merlin: I would die for you, I would kill for you, I'd give up my humanity and become a living weapon for you, I would sit by your grave for over a millennium, awaiting your return-

Arthur: but would you bring me breakfast on time?

Merlin: Well that's asking a bit much, don't you think?

Wow, I wasn't expecting to wake up to the news that Merlin's trending again, but I love it! To celebrate, here's another au prompt!

In this au, Arthur finds out about the prophecy of Emrys and the Once and Future King, and, in true himbo fashion, he knows that Merlin is Emrys, but he doesn't know who this "Once and Future King" is supposed to be. So, of course, he gets insanely jealous, thinking that some random guy with a powerful magical sword is going to swoop in, steal his throne, take Merlin from his side, and usher in an era of peace while Arthur is cast aside, forgotten.

Arthur simply cannot accept this, even if this Once and Future King is supposedly Merlin's soulmate, the one who will complete him. So, when Arthur repeals the ban on magic, he includes the stipulation that if the Once and Future King is ever discovered, he should be immediately executed on the grounds of high treason for attempting to steal the throne.

Mordred, distraught and turning to Merlin: Shouldn't well tell him?! Merlin, completely unphased: Nah, he'll figure it out eventually.

Arthur also gets hints from the druids, who are trying to get him to figure out that he is actually the Once and Future King, but Arthur always misunderstands their hints.

Druids: The time of the Once and Future King is at hand, sire. He has already taken up his holy sword, and his people rally behind him, inspired by his leadership and valor.

Arthur: This motherfucker already has his magic sword AND an army?! MERLIN! Send word to Leon to ready to knights for war!

Them....

The doomed timeloop yaoi

dakavendish

failed courtship

It’s 2am idk