spabbybanap

Latest Posts by spabbybanap

I truly believe we could fix so many problems if the world wasn’t making us all so dang tired

when i look up a knitting term, the last thing I want is an ai overview. I want a 60+ year old woman with no understanding of lighting or helpful camera angles who still manages to give the most concise and clear explanation of how to execute purl 2tog through the backloop. ai summary fuck off, where is phyllis?

"sorry that probably doesn't make much sense" <- for perfectly intelligible & logical statements relevant to the present conversation

"you get what I mean." <- for unparsable non sequiturs

the shame of making a connection irl and them being like omg can i have your insta??? snapchat????? and having to be like sorry i live in a gap between two tree roots youre just going to have to normal text me like some kind of animal

Man, I've missed seeing Ducks and How to Make Them Pay on my timeline, so I'm gonna rectify that.

Ok, loves, so we've all got the message that joking about suicide is bad for your mental health. Now we need to get on "joking that the planet/all of humanity has no future is bad for societal health/encouraging resistance to bad shit."

Still one of my favorite representations of ART.

Murderbot meets ART (who knew transports could be smart enough to be MEAN)

On god, this is what it's like to have sex with Adhd. Now just keep looping it all and...what do you mean I have to stay focused. >:(

I *am* focused...on trying to match Cbat to our rhythm. >:D Whonka whonka womp whompa whomp wheeeet

dominant things you can say during sex

i didnt hear what you said

hold on i need to blow my nose

wow

i feel kind of nauseous

is this anything

i don't know

this kind of reminds me of that one song

we can probably ignore that noise if you want to

why is my sock wet

it smells bad in here

that was weird

where are my glasses

ow

this is normal

sorry

just 2 chill people chilling

this is cool

can you say that again

are we good

youre actually naked

Yes! The lateral violence! I see this so much irl as a lower class American so the parallels are paralleling! I'm screaming about it from the rooftops.

something I found very interesting throughout the series was all the lateral violence

sure eventually SecUnit starts to ever so slightly reduce the violence it does to other SecUnits but it still doesn’t fully recognise its own bias against SecUnits.

anyway here’s some SecUnit on SecUnit violence ft System Collapse

It’s battle style kept giving me over-dramatic wrestler-grappler vibes, lots of up close grappling and desperate scrambling, and i also like doing figure studies soooooo

I really liked in the last two books especially network effect it had more introspective thoughts

it’s constant running thoughts and internalised hatred about how awful secunits are

that it admitted to itself that its angry all the time in one brief line then never went into it deeper

how willing and eager it is to tear other sec units apart but hesitated on killing people (admittedly took a few books for that to happen) and starts disabling instead

doesn’t quite make that connection between the constant anger, the safety it feels in being violent to other secunits and the anxiety and fear it still feels about humans in power over it.

but the others are not so violent against secunits and it starts to secondguess its responses (but not quite its internal thoughts)

then starts to disable (some) secunits where possible and even voluntarily giving some govmod hacks

perhaps it’s starting to recognise other secunits are people too? may or may not branch out to combatunits when?

secunit gets trauma therapy when

i am nooooot locked the fuck in. im locked the fuck out. call the locksmith

Absolutely my vibes. Man, I need to get back into making Little Guys ™ (gender neutral) because they really bring such joy to life ☺️

New friends just dropped

🦉🦔🐋🐦‍⬛🐻🐏🦝🦫🐇

An accurate representation of my day

quickie 030

Love this so much

Part 17 in my weekly poster series of 2025

i dont like it when electronics talk to me like i understand from a usability standpoint why they do but when i pair my headphones i'd much rather get a little beebeep than a white woman jumpscare

I would like to manifest more of this in my life

𝔣𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔥 𝔠𝔬𝔣𝔣𝔢𝔢 + 𝔣𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔥 𝔣𝔩𝔬𝔴𝔢𝔯𝔰 + 𝔣𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔥 𝔞𝔦𝔯

I hope I'm not just a mutual to you, but someone you want to bring up in irl conversation so you have to awkwardly and cryptically say "my friend..." and refuse to elaborate on my origins or the origins of our friendships

Edit: The two updated versions got lost in the reblogs, and people keep asking for characters, so I'm editing the original post now.

Also, after playing In Stars and Time, I have realised Siffrin isn't really voiceless in the way I meant, and people have said Six and especially Mono shouldn't count, but consider: it's my gender and I get to choose the blorbo

i am full of love and also fatigue

Happy Ides of March to all those who celebrate. ☺️🔪

its unreal how all of my favorite characters have exactly the same traits and hobbies and diagnoses as me

seeing straight men be disgusted by booktok smut recommenders has actually radicalized me to the side of booktok smut recommenders. girls your taste may be atrocious but i will never disparage you for exposing mainstream discourse to the concept of soaking through your underwear. spent my whole life listening to men talk about penises it’s about time they get jumpscared by women talking about pussy in crude detail on social media. go forth and goon my warriors

just read “to be loved is to be worth the inconvenience” it blew my mind away

This is a call-out post for my monstera 👀

Nosy ass plant

;_; Stabbed in the heart by user gatheringbones on this fine winter's day. Thanks friendo T^T

more dating advice:

often times the thing a shy person needs to extend themselves a little and show you more of themselves is for you to extend yourself first, show yourself first, and make a safe staging ground for the shy person to emerge— which requires a certain amount of vulnerability and bravery on your part

that vulnerability can be repulsive to people who find vulnerability triggering, but that repulsion isn’t a reflection of you or anything to do with you and encountering that repulsion shouldn’t be taken as discouragement or negative judgement

most people who date don’t want to actually partner up with another human being and create a loving connected relationship with that person, they want to float in a sea of mostly positive feelings that make them feel better about their image of themselves

being vulnerable and brave and real has the power to jerk those people out of the fantasy. it forces them to identify themselves (and to bail) and to stop wasting your time.

other people experience great relief and warmth and increased connection upon encountering someone who can be real and can treat the relationship like it’s real

those people provide a very good baseline to start an actual romantic relationship with.

"I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting." <<This.

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

fundamentaly embarrassing to show reference pictures to the hairdresser. Like yeah. Hey. Here's a picture of a guy who looks cool. One day I would liketo look cool as well. Can you try to make me look cool. With these paltry ingredients Can you try your very best to alchemize a guy who looks cool right now. In 30 minutes, can you make me into a person. Hey, for twenty five dollars, can you fuck my shit up forever? Could you give me a haircut. Is that too much to ask. Could you cut my hairs