Stabbymcjones - An Ignorant Fool

i was gonna make a goofy haha post but emily shouting “choke on grapes bitch” is so much more funny than anything i could type that it was like she broke into my house and knocked all the teeth from my mouth

shiro: matthew holt stop it!

matt: that’s not my name

shiro: oh sorry i just assumed matt was short for matth-

matt: mathematics holt.

shiro: you’re…you’re fucking with me

matt: what? so i’m a liar now?

shiro: no…i…

matt: yeah i’m fucking with you

i hope that after all this, ruby will be able to join the circus like she’s always wanted to do.

pop quiz! in this episode fig faeth _______:

throws a crustacean party

indulges in the teen rockstar life

tried to eat a random mushroom off the ground to get high

gets her contractually backed kisses in with ayda

is served legal papers from a judicial servant of hell

peels her pee-stained father out of the tire well of a van

answer: it’s all of them. emily axford is a bag of loose radioactive particles kept together by her drive to kill brennan and sheer glee

when belizabeth bastard pulled her move, i immediately started trying to think of an intricate legal defense to buy more time. my friend shot out of his seat and yelled “it’s time to deck that bitch” and honestly that’s the dichotomy of dnd, baby

in sweetness there is strength, there is sadness, there is sorrow. in sweetness there is humor, grief, there is wild anger and loud joy and a spectrum of feelings in between. in the raucous cheering shared while watching with friends, to the quiet moments in twilight hours wrapped in blankets and heavy feeling, through all struggle and triumph, i am left knowing in sweetness there is hope. 

SPEAK NOT OF THE NIGHT YORB

I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. A guy asked me what the Spanish word for tortilla was once and now I dream of kissing him under the moonlight

jeremy shada is immediately shot and killed by a pistol wielding lauren montgomery

The year is 2020. It’s the day before the release of the last season of Voltron. There’s a stage with nobody on it and it’s completely dark. When the light turns on, Jeremy Shada is alone on the stage with a single microphone. He hesitates before speaking. “Klance is Cannon King.” He says. Jeremy Shada has spoken, and the crowd applauds.

holy FUCK gang

we got gorgug and fabian quality time. riz and fig pulled some super spy hijinks. adaine asked for her big sister and was listened to. kristen ascended to sainthood. two fathers died. gilear canonically has a massive shlong. i wept and laughed and wept some more. i can’t wait for friday.