"God Is A Pop Culture Icon."

People have been saying stupid stuff since language was invented and I don’t say anything so all I can do is listen, and I’ve been doing that my entire life, but the second I decide to post some of it, nobody say anything even remotely funny??

"We need more queer pyromaniacs around here!"

"I'm gorgeous, it's my personality that's the problem."

“That’s my second claim to fame; I was once told off by a rodent!”

-My grandma, who once got shouted at by Mickey Mouse at Disney Land

“Zounds, ye whore!”

-Literally William Shakespeare

“I’m far too goth for gravey.”

-Me, not goth in any way

“I would make a better Hitler than Hitler!”

-My brother

"Today I shall be expanding the list of reasons I'm going to hell."

"I'm so sad that sloths don't know how much I appreciate them..."

“Isn’t he the spoon God?”

-Somebody who probably just discovered a new religion