When U R Drunk And Try To Say Dude.

Driving to any music festival and listening to music with earphones in your ear is the equivalent of the third guy recording the porno movie

Can I put a finger in ur butt is equivalent of can I close ur shit valve??

You ever think that viral in case of internet is better but in case of real world it is the worst?

what the hell is going on in this country?!

U r more likely to survive a zombie apocalypse if u could pretend u are a zombie too.....

Ok listen closely.Humans can be fucking superheroes........y? See our fucking mind utilises 10% of its full power - this is a fucking myth but I think so what they meant was humans can only control 10% of our body .I can't fucking control their heartbeat and if I could possibly scale the highest peaks and deepest oceans. If I could control my fucking fat percentage i could eat a lot of burgers and pizzas and fucking walk around the entire Sahara desert. What the myth was that I could only control 10% of my body and if we could control the other 90% u know the entire world would be the flash.

Crab talking to oyster (at their family dining table):- give me the food.

Crab:- no.

Crab:- Why?

Oyster:- because I am shellfish.

Crab:- me too bitch give me the fucking food.

This just happened

YALL THEY’RE ADVANCING

Internet banking is just dealing with programming instead of actual people who judge u on how much less money u r depositing.

Also we can only use about half of the total power of my senses. There are people who could use echolocation and fucking hear every single word in a room full of people.If we could utilize the total power of each of our senses we could be superhuman. But the only thing stopping me from becoming a fucking superhuman is that I am too lazy to get off Tumblr...

Ok listen closely.Humans can be fucking superheroes……..y? See our fucking mind utilises 10% of its full power - this is a fucking myth but I think so what they meant was humans can only control 10% of our body .I can’t fucking control their heartbeat and if I could possibly scale the highest peaks and deepest oceans. If I could control my fucking fat percentage i could eat a lot of burgers and pizzas and fucking walk around the entire Sahara desert. What the myth was that I could only control 10% of my body and if we could control the other 90% u know the entire world would be the flash.