Do We Think That Bruce Wayne Sleeps With Others To Maintain His Brucie Persona Or Does He Just Pay People

Billy, whose parents died from being crushed by rocks in a buried tomb, watching as the wizard is killed by a massive rock falling onto him: oh…

Billy is just tumbling through the sky screaming while Freddy is on the ground recording him and can’t stop laughing

Billy hasn’t quiteeee mastered flying in his regular human form yet☁️

(Continuation of my last post ⬇️)

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AXE

What if Billy kept some of his powers in his human form? ⚡️

Before I knew I was bisexual I was just insanely dramatic and weird around guys I liked. I had a crush on this guy in my ward - he was older than me, he played bagpipes and had a cheerful dog and an old Volkswagen bus that he worked on all the time. He also had nice scruff and unnaturally attractive hands and a good sense of humor, so I was like FULLY smitten.

I talked about him a lot and about how he was just so dang COOL, dang it, because he was so frickin’ cool. And I really liked him. I thought he was funny and smart and interesting and cool and fascinating and a bunch of other weird feelings I barely had the attention span to think about (I think my ADHD may have prevented me from coming out for a while tbh).

One day, I’m like 14-15, his dad is called to be my Sunday School teacher. His dad is this ex-military hardass with a chip on his shoulder for absolutely no reason and unattainable standards for his children. He spent most of Sunday School talking shit about his eldest boy and how he was rebellious and didn’t listen to him and how that was going to make him a bad adult and a bad son forever. How his son was too lazy and unmotivated to be successful because he didn’t listen to his advice on how to read the scriptures. He complained about how our generation was too weak to do things right and that our generation would surely be the one that brought the world’s downfall because of our laziness and sin.

And like, first of all, that guy can already go fuck himself for that. To clarify, that’s already stupid. BUT. He was talking about the man I had uncomfortable dreams about at least once a month. I couldn’t stand it. I’d get so mad I’d go home shaking sometimes because how fucking DARE he insult his hardworking stunning son by calling him lazy? For not reading the Bible the way his dad wants? When he’s already spending his time learning bagpipes? And fixing cars? And being cool? And cute? Who the fuck even cares if he uses the footnotes in the Book of Mormon? Who gives a rotten rat’s ass if he doesn’t use the scripture study manual his dad uses? He’s so cool he doesn’t even need it? So fuck off?

And eventually I got fucking Sick Of It and decided to mutiny. And by mutiny, I mean skip class. I’d just not go. And after a bit, adults started noticing and bugging me about it. At first, this was put off by small talk and excuses, but as my absence from Sunday School became more well-known, my excuses began to be rejected.

“Oh, Lizard, why aren’t you in class?” Uhm idk because my Sunday School teacher is mean to his kid and that makes me so mad wtf do you want from me? 🫠🤔

“Where’s your class, I’ll go with you!” Oh no ty I’d rather peel my own eyes than have my taste in men critiqued tyty 🩷

“Lizard, you should go to class, I’m sure they miss you!” And I miss the innocent days where my stomach didn’t hurt when a cool boy I knew was being belittled but unfortunately for us both those days are LONG gone and all that’s left is a budding psychosexual clusterfuck that will render me almost fully incapable of functioning for the better part of a decade so Bye Bye, sister Smith 🙂‍↕️

It had gotten to the point that ward leadership was involved. I was being approached by members of the Young Men’s presidency and the Bishopric to try and make me to back to class. They were telling me God had told them to find me and instruct me on my rebelliousness. This is where I implemented my secret weapon - women. Mormons are weird as hell about a lot of things, but especially about women. And I was GREAT with women. So to combat the leadership’s attention, I started helping women.

Our ward had a lot of new moms with babies who were, as babies tend to be, fussy. But for Mormon women the church is often their only social outlet, so they try to power through as long as they can even if it means enduring the exhausting ordeal of taking care of a fussy baby at church.

For what it’s worth, I have a lot of sway with babies. I got baby street cred. Me and babies have a rapport. I have always known this. I have always loved this. And in this crucial gay time in my faggot life my baby mind powers came in clutch - Every time I saw a member of the bishopric getting close, or a young men’s leader giving me side-eye, I’d start walking slowly towards class, passing by relief society. I’d wait until a mom’s baby had gotten too fussy and needed to leave the room, and I’d swoop in like a knight. “Oh, don’t you worry sister, I’ll bounce him a bit. You go back and hang out with your friends in class. You deserve a break.”

If it was a diaper change or something they’d tell me no. But if it was just some good old-fashioned baby fusses, I mean, they’d be moved almost to tears. They just got their social time back AND a free babysitter who is renowned as the Baby Whisperer. And because I was holding a baby as a favor for someone else, I of course could not reasonably be bothered to return to class.

So just like that, I was out of everyone’s sights. This went on for about a month before the straw that broke the camel’s back, which was that without my class participation the classes were quiet and awkward. I’d often take the brunt of Sunday school lectures by answering questions impulsively and over explaining myself enough that the clock could run out without anyone needing to do or say much. My absence meant everyone else was getting hit with the full unpleasantness of this guy’s bullshit. And so slowly, one-by-one, I had a group of about 8 kids on baby-holding duty. These new moms were so overjoyed, they and their husbands were both so actively in our corner that now chastising us was untenable. Now we had bargaining power. So the Bishopric approached us, confused beyond confused and uncomfortable beyond uncomfortable, and said,

“What’s it gonna take to get you back to class?”

The POWER I possessed in that moment was addictive. By being kind to the women of the ward and ignoring the Mormon de facto Rule of Law of following rules en-masse so the rule breakers feel left out, there were now so many people breaking ranks that we had effectively enacted a church boy labor strike. And they crumbled so fast it was almost like we had swayed God himself to our cause.

“I want brother assholedad gone. He sucks at teaching.”

I didn’t even have to say it. One of my rebels said it for me. I just nodded sagely and said “Yes, his class is not edifying. It’s better to not go and hold babies.”

And just like that, with a snap of my limp-wristed, Christ-wounding, bottom-brained fingers my faggot will was enacted. God’s revelation that brother shitdad was his chosen Sunday school teacher flipped on a dime. Suddenly brother shitdad was asked to be an usher and the fun dad of another one of my crushes was called in to teach us. I still stayed to hold babies a lot, but the rest of the class returned and all was well again.

Although I didn’t recognize it then, I think that was a formative moment for me in a lot of ways. I learned that being really persistently annoying will get me what I want from authority eventually. I learned that God’s will can be swayed by going in strike. I learned that ignoring men’s made up authority forces them to level with you as a person. I learned that caring for women, especially vulnerable women, can make a whole world happier. I learned that letting women rest can help them feel more love for the things that matter in their life. I learned that social bonds make everyone stronger and happier. And I learned that loving others in a gay way can change the world.

Be gayer. Read Terry Pratchett. I love y’all 💕

I’ve been thinking about the “turned into children” trope that we batfam enjoyers love, and one that I really like is the justice league turning into children. Bruce from before his parents died (see: a little piece of shit), Diana from before she learned about the outside world (see: really confused bc men??), Oliver at 15 (see: also little shit but for entirely different reasons) and so on and so forth… BUT then we have captain marvel who’s already technically a child, so I present you the idea:

Billy doesn’t turn into a child, and stays in his adult form. He has to take care of the league, because the world can’t know that they’re children (duh), but he’s having a really hard time seeing as he’s also a child. No one questions why he’s not a child, because you know, they’re not league yet. But once they’ve transformed back (they keep their memories), they start running tests (both magical and scientific) on him to find out why he it didn’t effect him, but find NOTHING. In the end they deem that maybe captain marvel is just immune to reverse aging spells.

And this is where I present to you yet ANOTHER idea:

One day one of them (whoever you like) sees billy transform and assumes he was hit with a reverse aging spell. Cue Billy having to dodge actually explaining how he’s a real child and why the reverse aging spell didn’t work on him

i think at a certain point damian is just making shit up when he talks about his childhood just to cause a reaction like he'll say "i've trained with swords before i even learned how to walk" and it will be true but he'll see your awed reaction and go "....and every week they would declare a free for all and order every league soldier to attempt to kill me. they called it slice the baby saturday" and he would just be lying out of his ass

Billy, talking to a war criminal like Mr Mind: “Hey! Can you please stop that?”

Billy, talking to his siblings after they mildly annoyed him: “do that again and I’ll fucking end you and your bloodline”

Let him have that Cain instinct

Idk about you, but it’s very important to me that Cassandra Cain has a scratchy and sore sounding voice paired with an accent that is completely unique.

Like, that girl was homeless and wandering the US for around 9 years! Pairing that with the fact she didn’t use her voice often/at all for the first 17 years of her life then of course her voice will sound weird from the disuse!

POV: you see your coworker —who is basically had all the sunshine in the world packed into the body of a buff dude— get so incredibly rage filled when he saw some random civilians being taken hostage that the villain’s entire fortified base was destroyed in a matter of booming lighting filled minutes. And then once your coworker’s eyes stop glowing from pure rage, he rushes over to these civilians and starts to cry from overwhelming relief.

And you think, oh, okay, those are his kids! But no, you hear in his worried babbling this fully grown man calling the little girl “sis” as the two kids are trying to reassure him while they look completely unfazed by the entire situation

I need more fics where the JL witness Captain Marvel (Shazam) get angry for the first time.

Like that dude would be absolutely terrifying.

Imagine, JL are on the regular mission and suddenly it’s revealed that the villain has two kids tied up and gagged as hostages (Freddy and Mary)

And the JL don’t even get to react before lightning starts to crackle off of the Captain and his eyes are practically glowing. And this dude just starts absolutely TEARING through every defence almost as fast as the flash and with more strength than superman. And if it weren’t for his morals you know he’d kill the villain on the spot just for laying a finger on his family.

So JL are just standing still in shock as Captain Marvel’s rage turns off immediately as soon as he’s with those random kids, bonus points if he’s on the verge of tears of relief that they are okay.

Because we’re talking about war games I just have to mention how fucking insane it is that after running herself ragged trying to get help, after hours being demeaned and cut into, after hours of brutal torture at the hands of a terrifying sadist, after breaking free and fighting back only to get shot, after bleeding out on the floor at the bottom of the staircase her limp body was kicked down, after all that Steph got up and she dragged herself away and she got onto a rooftop.

How unimaginably strong she was. How insane that she should have bled out there, that she should have collapsed and not gotten back up. How strong Steph was, that after all that, she had enough willpower to do anything at all. She had enough strength to drag herself forward.

Because that’s what Steph does. She gets up. Despite every indication she shouldn’t be able to, she got up. And then after all that she somehow still forced herself to have enough strength to try to explain herself, to try to explain that she just wanted to help.

Duke can see a few moments into the future but will deliver it in the most needlessly cryptic way

Jason and Bruce are arguing. Just before Jason storms off, Duke says, "If you walk out that door, you will experience unforeseeable pain and have no one but yourself to blame"

And Jason's all, "Stay out of this, Narrows"

Then he trips over his shoelace and Duke's like, "Told you so"