All I Do Is Over Caffeinate Myself And Function Incorrectly

someone else's thinsp ideal changes from day to day? some days I wanna be boney and some days I'm okay with wanting to be skinny fat

it doesn't make any sense yet here I am

I have a boyfriend since a month now and I slept over at his place from Friday to Sunday and my parents were super mad because we only talked about staying from Friday to Saturday and I betrayed my family and chose his family instead. They also said that I have to move out, they will sell the house and go to Italy (that part was definitely exaggerated) but I don't think they were lying when they said I have to move out til Friday. Like bro. I am not able to move out like from what money lmao. I am so scared they will throw me out. They threatened to do that before and now they added that they threw out my stepbrother (he is 30 now) a few years ago I can't remember how old he was then. I just want to spend time with my bf because he makes me feel like there's nothing wrong. When I'm with him I don't have to think about how bad I want to d word and how shitty everything is and how shitty I feel all the time. When I'm with him everything bad is just gone. We don't know each other for that long so I'm not sure if it is because I'm not too comfortable with showing my emotions but I legit cried in front of him because of a movie (more than once actually) and I didn't feel bad for crying in front of him.

I can hear my parents talk in the living room and I am getting so nervous because I just assume that every time I hear them speak they are talking about me. I don't want to be home but I don't want to be anywhere else but my room. Why does everything always have to be so complicated

scrolling through tumblr like looking at skinny people would make me skinny

Currently 2 of my former friends (I don't consider us to be close because we don't talk anymore lol) posted these on insta and they're both super skinny like every time I would see them in our former school I would be so jealous and only stare at their legs and the way they moved. They always seemed so light and carefree.

At work there's a woman even skinnier than them and every time she walks by I also get super jealous. Everyone around me just seems to have their shit together and then I'm over here lying in bed doing absolutely nothing except disappointing my parents with every second that passes, stuffing my fat face at home and also at work. Like can you imagine that I just go to the store on the opposite side of my workplace and buy stuff that together has over 1000 calories

i want all the extra fat on my body to fall off and turn into cash

can someone hide all food sources from me pls i beg u

this!!!

I want to be skinny

Every time it's going well for a week but then I completely destroy it by binging

I hate myself

Me trying to work out after eating like an actual animal for 7 months

you don’t need to be skinny to be beautiful!

now, me on the other hand