D2 - Blog Posts

Destcember Day 13: Theism

I live close to the center of the City, mostly for practical reasons. Any attackers would work inwards and therefore I would have time to pack before and grab a few people before I head into the sewers that are also under my house. Plus, all the best shops are here. However, this also means that I'm almost directly under the Traveler and it attracts the crazies like moths to a flame. As such, there is a temple to it just a few blocks away.

I've never put much stock in worshiping the Traveler. It never asked us to pray to it nor responded to prayers, so why should we. Furthermore, if it was really a god, it wouldn't need our help or praise. Did it kill Crota? Oryx? Guall? Did it beat back the Darkness another dozen times to rebuild the City? No. We did.

Even if it did ask us to pray, should we? It certainly isn't working out for the Hive or the Vex. All they did was join a magic pyramid scheme. "You work hard and give us 99% of what you make and die for us. We will sit here and watch, maybe doing something when we are all about to die." Even their "gods" aren't really gods. I've personally killed two and have the bits to prove it. The Black Heart and Xol went down with enough bullets and I assume the Traveler would too.

Therefore, the only manner of Theism ascribe to Maltheism. Everything that claims to be or looks to be a god is either incompetent or evil. The only good one needed an army and it's own heroic sacrifice to save fraction of one of the numerous species it tried to help. The rest are omnicidal bastards. So, screw the gods, we are better off without them.

...

"Did you really have to tell off those missionaries quite so severely?"

"Yew, the only reason I did it was because you vetoed dropping water balloons on them from the roof."

"Because that would have been cruel and childish. Anyway, you could have just said no to a donation."

"That's what I told them last time and they came right back the next day."

"They were from a different temple!"

"Oh, well now I feel a bit guilty."

Destcember Day 12: Last Man Standing

A warlock stands in his friend's apartment, dreading having to ask for his advice. Although his friend is less academically inclined, he is no less passionate in his work. Asking him for advice will inevitably lead to a two hour lecture including several charts, but what must be done must be done. Apparently, these thoughts dragged out long enough for the silence to become awkward, so the titan takes the initiative and breaks the ice.

"So Ash, what brings you here? Usually you just call when you want to chat, so it must be important."

"Well, you know that I never got a Recluse."

"Really, I could have sworn you had one by now."

"Nope. Furthermore, no amount of bribery will get anyone with one to give me theirs. I can hold my own in the Crucible, but not well enough to convince Shaxx that I deserve his ultimate weapon. So Buloke, what I'm asking is can you give me some tips on the Crucible."

With this the Striker's eyes literally spark with excitement. He sprints out of the room only to return several seconds later with a corkboard covered in in pictures, thumbtacks, and enough red yarn to knit a sweater.

"I'm so glad that you finally asked! The current meta is quite complicated, so I'll start with the basics. You are going to want to bring a shotgun. There are a couple choices, but I prefer the Last Man Standing for its perks. You see..."

As Buloke begins his rant, Ash finally starts to realize what it is like to be on the other end of one of his manic speeches about his research. Although he is grateful to his friend, both for so easily agreeing to help him and for so frequently listening when he got in a similar state, as the lesson just finishes with the shotgun tips at around the half hour mark, a part of him begins to regret every decision that he has ever made.

"That gun had better be as good as they say it is," he mutters internally.

Destcember Day #10: The Big Bag Theory

"What is taking so long? I just asked you to get me a gun out of my bag and it's been like five minutes" asks a warlock as he rounds to face his friend. The friend in question sits waist deep in a pile of guns, synths, and assorted items, looking both annoyed and confused as they begin to speak.

"How are you doing this? I have been shaking this bag for the last four minutes straight and it never stops spitting out garbage. Is it bottomless or something? Does it contain a portal to the guns and garbage dimension?"

"Oh yeah, it's that bag. Well I have two theories. The first I like to call the Big Bag Theory. I think that I have used so much magic around that bag that some has seeped into its very being over time. It just kept concentrating until it created a pocket dimension with everything I have ever put in contained. No matter how much you take out, there will always be more. Haven't you noticed that some of the things you have pulled out are duplicates of things that you already took out? It must be locked in a quantum state where everything inside both exists and doesn't until you take it out, making it technically limitless."

"Wow, really?"

"Alternatively, I could have told Yew to hide in there and keep transmatting random junk from my vault in as you emptied it out. You know, just to fuck with you. But isn't the magic bag theory more fun?"

The titan glowers at their friend as muffled laughter can be heard from the inside of the very much mundane bag.

Destcember Day #9: Nine

The topic of the Nine can be a touchy subject for some guardians. I mean, they are invisible magical planets that have an unknown amount of power and goals alien to our own. At least with the Hive gods we know we can kill them with enough concentrated firepower. We can't even hurt the Nine unless we are willing to remove all life from the solar system then blow up a few planets.

This especially annoys the Vanguard, the control freaks that they are. If the strategy of "throw teams of six at a problem until it stops breathing" followed by "steal everything shiny that's not nailed down" fails to resolve the issue, then they try to use bureaucracy. They try to keep us from associating too much with them. "Don't talk about classified information around Xur or the Emissary" this and "Don't trust trust the Drifter" that. I'm pretty sure they are the ones who got the Trials shut down too, but that's a conspiracy theory at best. Not that it matters anyway, considering they're probably omniscient.

Personally, I think that having them around is in our best interest. Aside from the fact that I support peace and friendship with anyone not actively trying to murder us at this point, from a utilitarian perspective, they need us more than we need them. If we die, they die. If they die, nothing happens to us. Of course, they are working on that and I wish them the best of luck, but for now our interests are required to align. And considering every other species that we've encountered has actively tried to murder us all upon first contact, that makes us practically best friends.

Destcember Day #8: Alternate Universe

Two friends sit talking on top of a skyscraper that just reaches well above the clouds. Below them sprawls a gleaming metropolis that extends as far as the eye can see. The sky is clear and bright, without a hint of smog or rain. Overall, it is a beautiful day on Venus.

"You ever feel like something is missing?"

"What do you you mean? We literally have everything. Ever since the Traveler showed up a few millennia ago, things have just gotten better and better. We colonized every planet in the system and a few beyond, we solved scarcity, and now no one has to work anymore if they don't want to. Hell, we even cured death a while back. I mean, there was that thing with those evil pyramid things a few decades ago, but we sorted them out pretty quickly, with all the warning the Traveler gave us and all the time we had to prepare. What could possibly be wrong?"

"I don't know. It all just feels anticlimactic, you know?"

...

Simulation #540608849333807 Results:

Processing Power Required For Simulation: High

Paracausal Interference: Extreme

Accuracy: Within Acceptable Range

Premise: Golden Age collapse averted via failure of Darkness to locate Traveler before overwhelming force was accumulated.

Outcome: Convergence rendered unobtainable before heat death of the universe due to excessive presence of Light based paracausal interference and high level of human technological progress.

Timeline Deemed Nonviable

Simulation #540608849333807 Terminated

Destcember Day #7: Forge Your Destiny

"You ever notice that the best weapons are the ones you make yourself?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well not to insult SUROS, their weapons are fine, but they don't hold a candle to the stuff the Black Armory lets you make. Also, magic doesn't come premade. Thorn, Deathbringer, Bad Juju, we had to put those without more than vague guidance. Anytime we want something good, we have to forge it ourselves."

"Well, you know what they say. If you want it done right, commit the necessary atrocities yourself."

"You know that isn't what they say, right?"

"Ugh, I've been translating too much Hive lore."

In light of the Hive's return, I propose the following:

That'll show 'em.

Fireteam member, helping to drag a heavily traqulized Royal Beast back from the Pleasure Gardens to my ship:

"So why are we doing this? It would have been easier just to kill it and take the loot"

My Warlock:

"I need it for... ... ... psionics research."

*whispering to the dog* "Good boy. New Pet."

When you see someone else wearing the same armor set as you in Gambit Prime, there is always the mental fight between "Oh, I guess I better switch sets to another role" and "I do not trust this random person to play my role as well as me or myself to play a role I'm unused to".

Me, Before the Allegiance Quest:

"Well, I don't quite trust the Drifter, but I agree with him more than the Vanguard, so I'll side with him."

Me, after the Drifter says that he trusts you and considers you one of his only friends:

Having just listened to the allegiance quest audio logs, I have decided two things:

1. The Drifter is too pragmatic for his own good after years of hardship and betrayal

2. The optimal solution to part 1 is some friends who won't die/betray him/try to kill him and a group hug.

So, join us. Side with the Drifter. Hug the Drifter. Prove that it's ok to hope.

All such amazing options

the next destiny 2 season, you’re put on a string of various dates arranged by emperor calus cause he heard you were alone the past two years of crimson days and felt bad after all you’ve done for him

that’s the entire raid. if you don’t get with anyone by the end of the raid you have to date calus himself

I have questionable tastes

joker’s wild is here and penumbra is coming and i’m reminded of the Discomfort

I just read the new lore book, "For Every Rose, A Thorn", and I have to say, everyone needs to read it right now. Also, Shin Malphur gets a slot on the favorite characters list.

Hive Worms Are Just Tiny, Evil Roombas

Imagine if hive worms outside their host don't quite have depth perception, but also because they are worms they refuse to take help and are not given any, so until they find their host they just wander the hive tomb ships eating any scraps of food they can find. They would be like tiny, evil Roombas and there would be hundreds of them just crawling around the ships and running into walls in a way that could almost be called endearing.

I got both the Chaperone and the Last Word today. I can feel the power of the cowboys flowing through me. Yeehaw

Goodbye for now, Mara Sov.

You will/absolutely-will-not-be missed, to be decided on a case by case basis.

If Mara Sov's shade of morality had a hexadecimal code, I'd say it would be around #383838. Not evil, but definitely not good. Mara Sov: committing pretty evil acts for the Greater Good*

*Terms and restrictions may apply

Down with blade barrage and down with the Last Word quest step 2.

The Last Word quest is like trying to run up a greased slide while a bungie cord holds you to the ground. I have been at this for two hours and have made no progress. I'd say to kill me, but then I'd just lose more progress.

Among kinderguardians, it is almost a right of passage to get your own sticky grenade stuck to your hand. In fact, there is a somewhat secret betting pool in the Tower for how long until it happens to each new guardian. The longer a kinderguardian goes without it happening, the larger the betting pool grows. The current record is two weeks.

I know it will never happen, probably because it would be a nightmare to program and balance, but I want a flamethrower. Just imagine it. Finally being able to literally kill all of those creepy thralls and screebs. Seeing the home of the enemy burn down around you. Looking at your Ghost worry as the fire glints off your wide eyes and wolfish smile. In conclusion, fire good.

If Guardians still play baseball, I guarantee you that someone has accidentally thrown their Ghost instead of the ball. I'm not sure how or why it happened, but I am completely that it has.

Idea For A New Iron Banner Ghost Shell

A wooden looking shell, studded with metal rivets similar to the Iron Banner guns. The top half of the shell has a constant, flickering flame. If the shell was really creative, the color of the fire would change with the shader.

A possibility for the name and flavor text are "Flickering Shell: For Ghosts who keep the spark of hope alive."

Jobs For Guardians In Peacetime

It's interesting to think about what will happen to Guardians after the perpetual wars that humanity is in end. Of course, many will likely stay on as warriors. Even if we do ever defeat the Darkness fully, there will always be threats that are unrelated to it, such as the Cabal Empire.

Others will likely just retire, having more than earned the rest of their possibly eternal life off.

Besides those, there will be some who are tired of fighting, but still would like to work. They could do dangerous jobs, like construction, mining, or demolition.

For those who want a more peaceful job, there careers too. They would make great historians and teachers, with some Guardians having been there for every event since the collapse, or writers. In fact, with infinite time to become good at their job and an inbuilt drive to do so, they would be great at any profession.

Finally, and my personal favorite, there are the jobs who can't give up the love of the unknown and wanderlust. Guardians would also great explorers, due to them not strictly needing food, water, environmental protection, etc and an eternal companion to prevent isolation insanity. They could search for new civilizations or habitable planets to colonize. If the explorers ever find a civilization who isn't immediately, genocidally hostile, certain Guardians would make great diplomats. They have spent years dealing with hostile and insane aliens, they have their Ghost and personal experience to help translate, and the unspoken warning of being able to use an immortal warrior who has killed tens of thousands including gods as a simple diplomat wouldn't hurt.

Anyway, those are just some of my headcanons. What do you think that Guardians will do during peacetime?

Good Job Bungie

You broke free from Activision before they killed you and Destiny. I have full faith that you will be able to bring about an even better version of Destiny without them looking over your shoulder. But be careful, because there are too many examples of studios with great ideas becoming drunk on freedom and over reaching, leading to disasters. Regardless, we are all proud of you and excited for your progress. Good luck and best wishes.

I wonder what Uldren has been up to for the last few weeks. Has he made it to the Tower without anyone noticing, even the Vanguard? Did he get lost somehow and is just wandering the system aimlessly? Did Mara and/or a Corsair swoop him up, requiring us to maybe have to stage a daring rescue mission? Or, more likely, does he keep getting spawn killed because he is a level-1 kinderguardian in revived in the Dreaming City, a level-50 war zone, completely unarmed and unarmored. I'm guessing that it is the latter. Probably about time to start sending out the search and rescue parties, whatever the case.

We did it guys. We finally got Mara to express a strong emotion. Unfortunately it was terrible, burning anger, but still. Baby steps.

Also, Ghost deserved that chewing out just a little bit.

Edit: For the record, I still think Ghost is great. I just really hope that Mara has good reasons for her choices and has a sliver of goodness buried deep inside. Maybe. Possibly.

It would be nice if in a future update we got some lore about Banshee's past. I'm pretty curious to know what circumstance led him to having his memory reset 44 times, more than double the limit that Clovis Bray estimated for safely rebooting an Exo. Lore about Banshee could also tell us more about the live of an Exo, which would be neat. Personally, Exos are my favorite playable race, so any lore about them is always appreciated.

You have Ghost Shells, but now introducing Ghost Armor. Sure, Ghost Shells are fine for the Crucible or your days off, but when you go into the field, you need more protection. Made with three inches of solid titanium and bulletproof glass over the eye. Worry no more that a bullet or punch will take out your little friend. Also available in bulletproof glass or laser-reflecting plates.*

*Warning: Additional weight may impair Ghost flight, movement, and/or speed.