If We Could Talk To Cats That Would Not Change Their Asshole Behavior At All - Blog Posts

aro-in-danyl

3 years ago

Parseltongue & Tom Riddle

I really need to see more fics with snakes being assholes and Tom having to suffer because they refuse to leave him alone.

You can’t tell me on a cold night 20 something snakes wouldn’t stick to Tom like glue.

Or the cat equivalent of sitting on your face while your asleep and suffocating you with fur. AKA noodle boi accidentally wrapping around his neck too tight.

And snakes do not know boundaries:

Snake: damn it’s cold

Tom: *minding his business*

Snake: ah-ha! *shoots up Tom’s pant leg just a touch too far*

Tom: *shrieks* MOTHERFU-!