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Jason Todd - Blog Posts
inaccurate Batfam quotes #25
Damian Wayne has often been depicted for his uncharacteristicly mature and strikingly violent behavior, but he 100% always participates in childish games like "tag" or "hide-and-seek" because, and I quote (His non-existant quote, this is a headcanon don't @ me) "I will not be bested by you imbiciles"
In the end he always has a good time with his brothers (because Dick is normally the one to drag him into it) and if anyone were to point out his smile, he would immediatly deny any and all accusations of having fun.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #24
Headcannon that when Jason was still Robin and in teenage rebellion phases, Bruce bought him a studio with blank walls like canvases and let him do whatever. He'd buy Jason Spraypaints and supplies for his birthdays or just whenever he needed them. After Jason came back from the dead, the studio became his "HQ". Though he didn't like Batman, he had to admit that he did one good thing in his childhood.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #23
Dick: Lil' D, If you were an angle; you'd be acute one!
Damian: That was revolting.
Jason: What about me?
Tim: Ad-Jason-t
Dick: High fives Tim
inaccurate Batfam quotes #22
The Batboys have a traditional game that helps 'train' them to always stay on alert, even when they don't expect it-- even at inoportune times... That's at least what they told Bruce so he'd let them play it.
Jason, jumping on the couch: The floor is Lava!
Dick: Jumps on the Chandelier
Tim: Climbs a bookshelf
Damian: Mounts Batcow™
Bruce: Sighs heavily, pulling his legs onto the chair he was already on
-absolute silence-
Dick, already on his aerial ropes: The floor is Lava!
Jason: casually climbs kitchen counter and continues to eat chips while reading
Damian: Climbs on his bed but decides that's not good enough and climbs on top of the canopy
Tim: Casually stands on the bathroom sink, flipping through research like nothing happened
Bruce: Grunts and simply sits in his office chair
Tim, looking around to see everyone lounging in the cave after a particularly long mission: The floor is Lava.
Damian: Jumping onto Bruce's back "Sacrifices must be made father."
Dick: Cartwheeling onto the Batmobile
Jason: Lay's on the ground completely monotone I'm suffering.
Tim: Shrugs and Joins him
inaccurate Batfam quotes #21
Batboys as D&D Races...
Dick: Bard-- obviously-- and Genasi, since he's decended from Gypsies.
Jason: Paladin Tiefling.
Tim: Warlock Kalashtar.
Damian: Elvish Assassin Rougue, class Eladrin for his unpredictable behavior.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #20
The batfamily as romantic types...
Dick: The hopeless romantic and flirt, shameless, makes it known who he likes.
Jason: The confused about emotions but still making an effort; getting flowers that he probably just snatched from a feild, buying chocolates and gets embarassed about any positive feedback.
Tim: Border on stalking until he finds out what they like to use that as a tactical advantage, as well as over-analyzies every scenario.
Damian: Very foreward and very formal with everything, probably escort them to his Dads private yacht for a dinner date under candles and stars, being very serious the entire time.
Bruce: Emotionally constipated but sincere.
Barbra: Drops hints, but a lot of them. At once. Sometimes scares people but no one can turn her down, it's Barbra. Does not take no for an answer.
Cassandra: Very shy around them and makes casual comments; "You look nice today." etc.
Duke: Charming and patient, always there for his romantic interest as a friend first and lover second.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #17
Can we all agree it’s canon that Bruce and Jason have this weird competition of T-shirts to talk shit about the other? Like... Bruce walking around one day and the paparazzi take a picture of him in a “proud father of a great kid who’s sometimes an asshole” shirt. Jason sees it and retaliates by wearing a “Wonder where I learned to swear” shirt to an informal party and they just kept going.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #16
Batboys going grocery shopping
Dick: In the cart
Jason: pushing the cart
Damian: Scowling at the two idiots he regretfully calls his brothers
Tim: Has a separate cart and getting the groceries, pretending to not know them
Everyone: Watching the two oldest people in the group be the most irrisponsible.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #15
Jason: Whatever, accidents happen.
Jason, pointing at Damian: How do you think he got here?
Damian: I will definestrate you, Todd.
Inaccurate Batfam quotes #14
Batfam on a rollar coaster:
Dick: Screaming in joy
Jason: Screaming in fear
Tim: Bored af
Damian: Pouting but secretly enjoying it
Bruce: Sitting stiff, internally screaming
Alfred: Sipping tea somehow without spilling
inaccurate Batfam quotes #13
Jason, snickering: shhhh...
Tim, peacfully reading:...
Jason: sneaks up and shoots a gun at the ceiling
Tim: jumps off the couch THIS IS WHY DAD DOESEN'T FUCKING LOVE YOU!
inaccurate Batfam quotes #12
Damian: Give it back, Todd!
Jason, holding a batarang over his head: What are you gonna do? Stab me?
Damian: Pulls out throwing knife yes.
Jason: wait, what?
Damian: stabs him
Jason: You little B*tch!
Bruce: appears Hey, no swearing.
Jason: Demon just stabbed me!
Bruce: Damian, what did I tell you about stabbing your brothers?
Damian: sighs don't stab your brothers...
inaccurate Batfam quotes #11
Tim: If I ever meet the first person who said "I'll sleep when I'm dead" I'm going to kill them.
Dick: Relax, Tim. Just drink your coffee.
Tim: This isn't even coffee. It's a 12 pack of Five hour energy mixed with cocoa powder...
Jason: An entire pack of 12 hour energy?
Tim: Does anyone else see the talking squirril?
Dick: uhhh, Tim? Squirrils don't talk.
Tim: Cool, just checking my sanity.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #10
Dick: Last night was a mistake and we must agree to never speak of it ever again.
Tim: Okay.
Jason: What happened last night?
Dick: No.
Tim: ...
Dick: Tim... Don't.
Tim: But...
Dick: Tim...
Tim: ...I saw Dick at the men's club.
Jason: Okay?
Tim: He was on the pole.
Jason: oh.
Dick: If you wake up glued to the ceiling, no one will help you.
Jason: I would help.
Dick: You'd join him.
Damian: I would laugh.
Dick: I know you would, Damian.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #9
(On a mission, the skylight window of Badguys™ hideout)
Dick: Okay, Redhood take the west wing. Red Rob--
Damian: Jumps into room with heavily armed men
Dick: ROBIN! YOU CAN'T JUST-- WHERE IS YOUR WEAPON?
Damian: I AM THE WEAPON!
Tim, to Damian: I swear if we survive, I'm going to kill you.
Jason: I knew I liked this kid.
Dick: Why am I always put on babysitting combat trained vigilante children.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #8
Tim, sighing exasparatingly: I don't know how to get a girls attention.
Jason: Ask Dick. He's gay and still a chick magnet.
Dick: Talking to some girls on the other side of the room
Tim: I can't even get a guys attention! How the hell does he do that?
Jason: I don't know. HEY DICK!
Dick, turns around and litteral sparkles apear around him: Yes?
Jason, confused and distressed: Nevermind. Yea, your screwed as long as he's in the picture.
Tim: Damn.
Jason, raising a gun: I know a way to get him out of the picture?
Tim: We are not going to kill Dick, hijack a garbage truck to feed his corpse to and move to LA, Jason.
Jason: sadly lowers gun
So, BirdFlash, right?
As most of you know, I have a wattpad account but I've recently posted the first chapters of some new books. For those Batfam and Birdflash fans out there that alreday read all those fanfics, I've added a new one to your to-read! I have so many Idea's for it and I'm super exited for your input! Go check it out!
https://www.wattpad.com/story/205275175-blue-and-red-belong-together
inaccurate Batfam quotes #7
Batman: phone rings "Hello?"
Tim: "DadJasonjustshottheguninthehouseandnoweverythingisinabsoluteanarchypleasecomesaveme" dodges vase "oh my god, DAMIAN! GO PUT THE TIGER BACK!"
Justice Legue: ...
Batman: "Wait, slow down. Jason did what? Damian has a Tiger?"
Tim: "Do you really need to ASK? THERE'S A TIGER IN THE HOUSE, BRUCE!"
Batman: "I'll be home soon. Is everyone okay?"
Tim: "My mental stability isn't but I think their fine-" BANG "Nevermind, Damian's been shot."
Batman: "Where is Alfred?"
Tim: "Silently watching us in the corner of the room." pause of silence "OH GOD, THERE'S A FIRE! I gotta go."
click
Batman: Emergency. I have to leave.
Superman, that heard everything with Super-hearing: ... Right. So-
inaccurate Batfam quotes #5
Dick: What are cute names to call your other half?
Tim: Sugar.
Jason: Honey.
Tim: ...Eggs.
Dick: What?
Jason, smirking: 1/2 lb butter.
Dick: Guys...
Tim: Stir.
Dick: Tim, no.
Jason: Pour into pan.
Dick: Jason, stop.
Tim: Preheat to 350.
Dick, sighing heavily: I hate you.
Tim: Love you too, preheat to 350.
Jason: Hate you too, pour into pan.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #4
Tim, calling out: I'm leaving!
Jason: Where are you going?
Tim: Hell, most likely.
Jason: Oh, pick me up on the way.
Tim: Carpool?
inaccurate Batfam quotes #3
Dick, running away with arms full of cereal boxes: Stay away from me!
Tim, running after him: YOU HAVE AN ADDICTION!!
Jason, running after Tim: HE TOOK MY GUN!
Dick: Cereal is my soulmate!
Tim: Get a life!
Dick: I'd die without my Frosted Flakes!
Jason: At least you won't be eating that junk!
Dick: I'll be burried with a box of Froot Loops!
Tim: Give it up! It's an unhealthy obsession!
Dick: hisses in raisin bran
Bang
Dick: YOU JUST SHOT ME!
Tim: Oh shit, I'm so sorry!
Jason: What have I told you about running with guns?!
Damian: I'm gonna put myself up for adoption.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #2
Jason: Is it worse to wear a Fedora or kill fifteen people?
Dick: ...Why is that even in question?
Jason: What if I kill fifteen people wearing a fedora?
Tim: It's a Fedoral Crime.
Damian: I'm about to kill you all if you don't stop.
inaccuate Bamfam quotes
Bruce: Who's going to help me take down Superman?
batchildren™: crickets
Bruce: Really? None of you? You're my kids!
Jason, from the back: We're adopted!
Bruce: Damian isn't.
Damian: I'm dating Superman's son, I can't kill Jon's dad.
Everyone else: ...
Bruce: Tim?
Tim: I'm actually dating Kon...
Bruce:... Jason?
Jason: Fuck you, old man. I just don't like you.
Bruce: Dick, tell me you aren't dating someone from the superfamily, too.
Dick: Nope.
Bruce: sigh of relief
Dick: Only Wally!
Bruce, realizing all of his kids are dating the pupils of the colleagues he dislikes most: I'm gonna go take a nap...
He has a flock of Robin's on him, he's screwed.
Yes, he is a bit too young to be a Crime Boss, that isn't going to stop him.
HEEHEEHEE….
Part 2 👇
plans for kinktober. (maybe)
10/10 - Schlatt : mirror sex
10/14 - Ted Nivison: size difference
10/18 - Dick Grayson and Jason Todd: tag teaming
10/22 - Percy Jackson (BOOK PERCY): overstimulation
10/26- Ghostface (any): deepthroating
10/30 - You Choose!
a/n: please note that these are not final, i made these up on the spot so feel free to share whom you would like to be included in my kinktober.
btw if u choose ‘we wanna chose who’ that vote is going towards yay kinktober
Dick may, just maybe, a tiny bit, not much really, be depended on Danny
It's just, he can go to Danny for anything, vigilante or civilian related, family or personal, it didn't matter how big or small
Danny was there
Since, forever really, meeting shortly after his parents death and sticking with dick since then? Yeah, Danny's been there and been a solid rock in his life for ages
So, maybe, possibly, perhaps
His reaction to Jason making a joke about asking Danny out might have been an overreaction
Should he have punched Jason? Should he have started screaming? Should he have snapped at the others when they tried to intervene?
Who knows
But this was his friend, his one constant
Plus Jason met him once
Dick will be damned if he let Danny be shooed away just because Jason decides to fuck around
Jason just got so caught up in cleaning up the kidnappers that he forgot that someone (Tim) got kidnapped. This happens every other month for Tim.
”What happens to you when the pit takes over?”
“I don’t really know. I just know it feels good.”
(Welcome back to head cannon alley where Jason isn’t really present during his pit episodes and instead goes into a floater like state. He doesn’t really know what’s going on all he knows is that the pit is indulging on his more morally gray actions.
Also it’s a head canon that the pit episodes gives an almost euphoric state, so you feel good when they happen. They’re addictive, which adds another layer onto why it’s hard to fight against them, to stay in control.)
For some unfathomable reason Kon doesn’t like Jason that much.