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Rei Todoroki - Blog Posts
Sketches of random mha characters
i am unwell about the todoroki family
Ny-ok here I go again, But this time it’s Enji!!!. I noticed in a panel his Bottom lip stuck out so here we go again!
This was the panel, (and theres the same in Anime, if anyone’s curious)
now here’s other panels/sceans that kinda contribute somthing to this,
Now this is probably just his resting B/grumpy face and nothing particular but I’m gonna use myself as an example for a moment, when I’m focused I tend to pout and jutt out my lips or bottom jaw kinda like both Enji and Touya, and seeing as the Todoroki kids all made This face as babies/little kids, I don’t think it’s out of the picture
I’m curious if it was a habit they adopted from their dad of him just having the habit of putting his bottom jaw forward as a resting face. .. or a genetic thing the Todoroki kids tend to take after their mom but they could have adopted some genetic form their dad, lets use Touyas smile at the end of the original post as an example, their making the same face, he got Enjis cocky smile with his own touch due to His genetics, it could make since eather way you put it, (and it’s more likely a genetic thing)
but then again Enji seems to just be jutting his bottom jaw/lip out as he frowns, it may be an underbite or just a habit, but in three pictures it certainly looks like an underbite However other times again it just looks Like a resting Grumpy face, it’s honestly hard to tell but he much like Touya he has Somthing going on,
the strange part is if it’s an underbite then that makes Touyas situation a little more strange since his top lip is the focus wall for Enji it’s his bottom if Touya has an overbite (which I don’t think he does) for this to happen there’d have to be other genetics at play.
And then I found this out, wall trying to find Some kind of connection between Touyas and Enjis different features I found out that if one parent has an underbite it’s actually more likely for their kid to have a gummy smile which Touya seems to have. so it all works out!
Basically Enji probably has a small underbite and a Habit wall Touya has a gummy smile due to how the genetics of unaligned jaws work and possibly a hyperactive lip. (Which may or may not be due to his burns) And I think the other Todoroki kids probably had the same as Touya and mostly grew out of it, (I say mostly because Shoto may have a pout going on to, his mouth does the same thing a Dabi’s . . .could be a habit to tho)
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
anyway, this next part is not That important, just an extra bit I thought I’d add! The kids Take after their mom Rei, (it’s obvious)
I hope this isn’t to hard to read/understand but basically, Enjis features are surprisingly less dominant then you’d think, Rei’s softer more kind features came thru on All of her kids, unlike Endeavors, whos are just kinda there in the background. . .
Touya (Dabi) (technically I should have used the picture of him when he woke up form the coma as reference but. . .eh ) hes got his moms face shape with a hint of his dads edgey features/ face shape, a mix, his eyes are header to pin down and this is why I say I should have used fresh out of the coma Touya, his eyes seem to be a mix as well Maby more on his dads side? But also round like his mom? It’s hard so I’ma just say Mix, he also has his moms nose
Fuyumi, mom's eyes, moms nose, and moms face shape, Maby theres a hint of her dad Somewhere in there but basically just a copy of Rei, like Natsuo being mostly a copy of Enji,
Natsuo, he’s got his dads jaw and general face shape, Maby just a bit softer, and he seems to have a mixture of both of his parents eyes leaning more on his dads, he’s also got his moms nose but it’s bigger. . .(dounno if it’s really a mix tho?)
aaaand Shoto, (I am not using time skip shoto because he scares me, I just don’t like it) so generally Shoto did take after his mom as well, her eyes with a hint of Enji (being the angle on them and sharpness) moms nose and moms jaw/general face shape, (but technically speaking it’d be better if Shoto looked more like both of his parents equally as the ‘perfect mix’ child he is)
I also just a funny thing I want to note: I had the Headcanon that the baby todorokis made that face as a thing thay got from their dad and he made that same face as a kid to or Maby even as an adult because I thought it’d be funny, so seeing something like this come to light for me is hilarious!
also I hope I don’t repeat myself to much I was basically writing this as I went and it was. . . .complicated to say the least. . . .it was still fun Tho!!! I love picking at small details like this!!!
Nya-Ok, I reeeeealy think Touya/Dabi has a Gummy smile/Overbite, or Something! Going on with his mouth.
I noticed in a video his gums kept showing a lot when he spoke and stuff and this interested me and I looked in to it and noticed, Yeah He Shows His Gums A Lot, especially when he’s having a manic Episode or just high emotions (Maby because he can’t cry? which is what he seems to have done a lot with strong emotions as a kid, or Maby it’s just exaggerated expressions and he needed some other way to express his emotions because he can’t cry)
In The pictures it eather show his gums or his top lip going up a lot, and (again) yes his facial expressions are exaggerated, and yeah some of these are the same scean and/or scenes close together but still. It’s interesting at least Also it seems to be more prominent in the manga, which tends to look way better detail wise and stuff (I love both anime and manga tho theirs both beautiful in their own way)
(the last picture in the line up is what makes me think of an overbite specifically, theres just something about how it looks)(. . . Also, I Hate that picture. . .)
now what I’d like to note is many things can cause a gummy smile, one of which is a hyperactive upper lip, another is overbite, genetics, medication, and other such things as well.
the hyperactive upper lip is interesting to me because he’s got burns on the lower half of his face/jaw which would probably have severe nerve damage, wall the description of this is actually having stronger muscles in the upper lip, or it’s where the upper lip moves excessively when smiling and such, revealing more gum tissue. I just think that bits interesting because of his burns. . . . .(does that even make since? . . .)
theres another thing I’d like to note as well
The face he makes here, it’s kinda like a pout but not, I have a gummy smile and I tend to make similar faces a lot . . . .just something I wanted to note, baby Touya along with the other todo babies made a similar face to (he’s so cute when he makes that face)
other photos:
(That face is Adorable, Especially when paired with his Japanese laugh)
Enji also makes a similar face, which makes me think I’m rong about all’a this and it’s just some face
All-en-all he seems to have something going on with his upper lip, and I’d say going off of the face him and his siblings made as little kids it may have been an overbite that never got corrected, especially since he was assumed dead in his teens which is when you’d typically get braces which can help correct such a thing, or it could a hyperboile upper lip because it seems to go up a lot even if it’s not showing his gums, eather way, I love his smile Touya. . .he’s cute. . .and insane. . . . I wrote all of this for fun, feel free to make a counter argument or whatever, I’d like to hear other opinions! (but be nice about it!), I thought it was a neat and kinda cute detail and I wanted to touch on/share it!. . . . But seriously it’s probably just his exaggerated expressions due to his manic episodes and such. . . . (Bakugo and Enji doing a similar thing helps that honestly. . .)
also this was my first time making an analysis(-ish) thing and actually DOING Somthing with it! I had fun! And I love making this type stuff! I also enjoy seeing all these pictures of Touya in one spot he’s so cute :> also sorry I repeated myself so much!
. . . .I do kinda get the feeling I’m completely rong and no one else sees this tho. . . Someone tell me I’m not entirely rong
@foundouthatdabiistouyatodoroki it’s not good, awful really but it was fun at least :>
"The Little Boy Lost"
Such a good poem, and it fits Touya perfectly. The saddest thing is that the boy didn't call his mother. Maybe she would have heard him.
What if
We know that Rei found out about Touya in the hospital, but was Enji brave enough to tell her about their son's death himself? I doubt it, but still...
They stand there like a part of Todorokis family
Chapter 303 - Top Three
(2/2) I BEG!!! SOMEONE DRAW MY HCS 😭😭 (no pressure, it'd just be cool)
“The Todoroki family would have been happy if Endeavor wasn’t so selfish.”
The Todoroki family wouldn’t have existed if Endeavor wasn’t selfish. If he hadn’t wanted to become number one and needed a child to pass that on to, he wouldn’t have married or had kids with Rei. The children never would have existed. It’s possible that Enji and Rei just never would have met.
if Things We Lost In The Fire by Bastille is not the most Todoroki family theme song ever
if rei and endeavour’s hair color mixed like dabi’s quirk, shoto would have pink hair.
you’re welcome.
boku no hero academia manga // someday i'll love - ocean vuong // start here - caitlyn siehl
Endeavor: Physical Strength vs Emotional Strength
Or The Total Mess that is the Todoroki House.
*Note: The following is not a defense of Endeavor nor is it excusing his actions. It is a deep-dive analysis into the complexities and nuances of his behavior and how it affected his life and everyone else in that family based on observations I’ve made throughout the series. There are also comparisons with other objectively violent characters from other series.
Trigger Warning for domestic and child abuse.
...
We're gonna start out by looking at what happened to his character over the available time frame. Endeavor did not start out as a violent person to his family. We can see that in the flashbacks of the family's early days.
Starting here, note that he’s not cold toward Rei in this scene. The way they’re walking around out here in the garden gives the impression that negotiations between him and Rei’s family are going well so far, but they’re out walking and talking in private just to make sure this arrangement is going to work and making sure further negotiation isn’t going to be a waste of everyone’s time. I say this because if he was dead set on ice powers for this Quirk marriage, Rei probably wasn’t the only option.
It's also important to remember Rei did choose this. She chose for her family rather than herself, but it wasn't her parents' end all be all decision. (And maybe there was familial pressure on her side, but it's not explicitly stated in canon so exactly how much free will Rei actually had is up for interpretation.)
However what I think shows here is they weren’t really talking all that much. Specifically, he is not ‘talking down to her.’ He is not treating her with any particular disrespect or putting her down as inferior. He doesn’t have the arrogance he later exhibits. This also isn’t him being aloof and ignoring her either. Look at his face, specifically his eyes. That is the same blank, deer in the headlights, “I have one brain cell dinging around in my head that is struggling to find a way to interact with people,” stare he shares with Shouto.
He has no idea what to say to her.
So finally, Rei turns off to the side to admire the garden, and he asks, “Do you like the flowers?” It’s a small thing, but it does show that in some capacity, he did show some interest in Rei and making her happy. He’s just stupidly awkward about it at this point. (Even if his ultimate goal was…well, we’ll get into that.)
But this trait of never knowing what to say is a massive defining part of Endeavor’s character that has manifested in a myriad of disastrous ways throughout his entire arc.
Now I don’t think there’s enough shown about Endeavor and Rei’s relationship that we can conclusively say they ever loved each other at any point, but I do think they were, at the very least, cordial in the beginning. They got along, they loved their children, and that in their minds was good enough for them. If you look at the scenes that are Touya and Fuyumi's early childhood, the family seems content. There's no sign of the abuse we see later.
The other big indicator that Endeavor was not originally a violent person to his family is the two very different ways he approaches training with Touya and Shouto. His motive for training them hasn't changed, but compared to the warmth and pride extended toward Touya we see in the above picture, Shouto’s experience with training in the second screenshot is harrowing and traumatic.
So why the difference?
A big reason is it has to do with age. When Rei defends Shouto, telling her husband that, “He’s only five!” and Endeavor is still pushing their son to achieve the standards of an older child, yes, this does show his impatience. However, the other unspoken sentiment here is he himself is not getting any younger. When Touya was born, Endeavor was twenty-two and had his whole life, career, and all his hopes with it ahead of him. His kid has a greater Quirk than his, his legacy is secure, nothing to worry about. But then they learn about the genetic issue with Touya’s Quirk. He can’t use his fire safely, he’ll never be able to use it safely, and he will never be a hero in the way Endeavor can.
Touya: Failure
Fuyumi: Failure
Natsuo: Failure
Shouto was probably viewed as his last chance. Endeavor was getting older and running out of time. If Shouto didn’t work out, then this legacy was dead in the water. At least, I hope Shouto was the last chance, otherwise he might've tried getting another kid out of Rei, divorced Rei and married someone else for the same reason, or attempted securing his successor through a grandchild.
Which is some freaky medieval way of thinking.
Anyone else getting Henry VIII vibes here?
Remember what I said about him never knowing what to say? The most obvious example of this is his complete and total inability to control the situation with Touya.
The tragedy of both Touya and Fuyumi's characters is they are the only two kids in the house who remember the happier childhood, and they both cling to that in their own way. It's why Fuyumi is so determined to 'fix things.' She's trying to regain the family they lost. For Natsuo and Shouto, things have always been bad in the house, hence why Natsuo bailed as soon as he could.
Then we have Touya. His flashbacks start with him at a toddler age. It is very common and normal for a child that young to prefer one parent over the other, but usually it's the parent they're most familiar with: The one that stays home with and takes care of them. Remember, to a toddler, everything is new and potentially scary, and that can also include a parent that is not always present: The parent that's working. In the Todoroki house, Endeavor has his career as a hero, so we have the indication that Rei was the parent who stayed home. In that situation, the probability of Rei being the 'familiar parent' was more likely, so for Touya to prefer his father over his mother shows just how close he was to Endeavor. Or because Fuyumi was the new baby and needed more attention, he could have gravitated away from Rei and gone to his father instead. He didn't see his father's ambitions for him. He didn't see that he was a successor as opposed to a son.
What he, through a child's innocence, saw and understood was that his father loved him and wanted to spend time with him.
Cue the genetic disparity of his Quirk: Where Endeavor failed as a parent was him never talking to Touya about what had happened. He didn't sit down with him and explain it wasn't safe for him to use his Quirk.
The My Hero world has a social problem of Quirks defining one's worth. It's not just the PLF's philosophy. Having no Quirk is viewed with pity and having a Quirk that can't be used could be viewed as a disability by this society, regardless of the fact it's completely possible to live a healthy life without having a Quirk. So Touya's 'issue' required compassion and understanding, especially from a parent. What Endeavor needed to say and what Touya needed to hear was, "This is a path that is blocked to you, it isn't your fault this happened, and I will love you regardless."
Instead, he just dropped him completely. (Given his character, I doubt he's even the one who broke the news to him.) In Touya's eyes, he didn't have the adult nuance to understand why he was being ignored; he just had the child innocence of, "I don't want to hang out with Mom and Fuyumi, I want to be with Dad. Why is he ignoring me? Why won't he train me anymore?"
What Touya learned from this is he only has value in his father's eyes as a hero. So he began training himself to be a hero because he was desperate to get that love and affection back. When Endeavor discovers the fact he's been training and burning himself, Touya never apologizes for disobeying him. He just repeatedly says variations of, "I can do this, then maybe you'll finally be proud of me."
Fuck, dude, just tell the poor kid you're already proud of him. That's all he needed to hear.
And Rei does call Touya out on this. She asks him, "Do you want to be a hero because you want to be a hero or are you doing this because it's what your father wants?"
In order words: "Are you doing this because you think it will make your father love you?"
And we come full circle to the 'death' of Touya where he realized, "I was never a son. I was a product."
...
Endeavor never addresses the problem going on under his roof. He handed the problem off to Rei. He didn't know what to say, he didn't know (and still doesn't) how to be a parent, and instead of confronting that lapse in his character, he instead made a coward's retreat back into the safe and familiar territory of being a hero.
This was the catalyst for his violence to his family.
Being a hero means fighting villains.
Fighting villains is often solving problems with violence.
Because he never knows what to say, he didn't know how to properly navigate a complex emotional situation, so he resorted to the only method he knew that worked:
Beat it into submission.
And since we have the previously mentioned signs they were once a happy, normal family, I have a feeling the violence began very suddenly and without warning.
...
To back this up, I'm gonna give a little personal insight here. I used to work in an orthopedic clinic and a lot of injuries that came through were hand injuries due to someone punching a wall out of anger/frustration. You may think this is fine since they didn’t hit another person and only hurt themselves, but the issue with taking your aggression out on even an inanimate object is you are unwittingly training your brain to associate anger with violence and make it all the more likely for you to lash out violently against another person.
Throughout his career, Endeavor has conditioned himself into this same mindset of repeatedly forging and reinforcing the physical connection of violence with the mental/emotional connection of anger.
Look at this scene from Arcane.
If you haven't seen this series yet, 1.) Get on that. You're missing out. (Don't worry, there's not too many spoilers below.) and 2.) This is Vi and this screenshot is from a scene where she, in a moment of anger and grief, strikes her little sister hard enough in the face to knock her to the ground.
Look at the horror in her eyes when she realizes what she’s done.
Now before and after this moment, we see Vi undoubtedly loves her sister and would die for her. (Season 2 pending...) The first thing she does when they're reunited is hug her and tell her how sorry she is. But Vi has also been a fighter all her life. The sisters grew up in the rough part of town, they had to fight to survive, and they've experienced a violent atmosphere from a young age. We also see that when Vi gets frustrated or angry, she punches/slaps inanimate objects, so she too subconsciously associated violence with intense emotions, and in a moment of blind rage/grief, she failed to dissociate and she hurt her sister.
It wasn't a conscious decision, but it happened nonetheless.
What follows is she walks away from Powder. She doesn't go far, she just puts some distance between herself and her sister to calm down and process what's happened and hopefully find a way to move forward. Only, for unrelated reasons that don't pertain to this topic, she is apprehended by authorities and spends the next 6-7 years in prison, obsessing over her regrets and finding her way back to Powder.
She is never going to forgive herself for this.
I bring this scene up because as far as fiction is concerned, we as the audience do often excuse a character losing their temper and hitting a loved one once. What Vi did was not okay, but because it only happened that one time, nobody is labeling Vi as 'abusive.'
...
So consider the first time Endeavor hit Rei. We don't see it in canon, but with all the indicators of a relatively happy home, I believe that first act of violence was the culmination of these factors:
Endeavor's ongoing inferiority complex with All Might and the frustration in his inability to surpass him, and then projecting that frustration onto his family.
The career of solving problems with violence.
The subconscious association of anger with violence resulting from that career.
I'm also going to throw out the possibility of multiple head injuries incurred from his career playing a role. Traumatic brain injuries can and often do lead to behavioral changes where an individual has trouble managing emotional responses, experiences anxiety, has a shorter temper, etc.
Obviously, none of the above should be treated as excuses (not even the TBI possibility because there's therapy options for that), but they are potential contributors to the pivotal moment of frustration and impatience where Endeavor, like Vi, failed to dissociate and did something he couldn't take back.
Striking Rei is his tea kettle incident. Think back to the awkward moron who didn't have a clue what to say to her when they first met. That young man never thought he would do something like this. That first moment when he hit Rei, I really don't think it was a conscious decision and it may have taken him off guard as much as it did Rei. Like Vi, he probably acted out of blind anger and may have been just as horrified by what he'd done, and I can imagine Endeavor walking away from that to calm down and process that he crossed a line he thought he would never cross.
Unlike Vi, who was going to return to Powder after calming down so she could apologize, beg forgiveness, and move forward, Endeavor is an emotional coward who never knows what to say or how to confront a complex emotional hurtle. So he did the same thing he did with Touya: He retreated from the problem and pretended it didn't exist, and because it was never addressed and he was never held accountable, it only got worse. The lid was off and there was no getting it back on.
I'm not saying there was a definite chance he could have come back from that (that ball was in Rei's court as much as it was Powder's) but Endeavor had a choice:
He could have addressed what he'd done and made amends by submitting to whatever consequence Rei set down for him.
Or he could have rationalized his own twisted justifications for what he did.
He chose wrong.
For another comparison of the violence aspect, I’m also going to bring up Shizuo Heiwajima from Durarara!!, a character who I think flies off the handle far more frequently than Endeavor does.
If you haven't seen Durarara!!, same as above with Arcane.
The nuance of Shizuo is the intense rage he experiences, the violence that follows, and his own inner turmoil. He associates violence with anger, but these are traits that he fully recognizes as detrimental to himself and his personal relationships with other people. He has a temper, he gets violent, he lashes out with abnormal strength and has seriously injured many people.
But the people he's attacked are usually people who provoked him, whether it's thugs who opted to harass him on the street or he heard that a friend was in trouble and rushed off to help them. Not that violence is the answer, but they were people who arguably deserved a beating. More importantly, though, is the way Shizuo treats his relationships with caution. He's a loner by choice. He does want to connect with other people, but he keeps his distance because he legitimately fears harming someone he cares about. Because of his caution and self-awareness, he is a complicated and likable character that I think anyone with a short temper who has said or done things they regret can relate to.
If he didn’t have that level of control on himself and was violent with everyone regardless of who they were to him, he would be despised by the fandom as much as Endeavor is.
This is how Durarara!! can get away with presenting a violent character in a comedic fashion. Shizuo, despite his temper, is an absurdly strong guy, a little bit of an idiot, and fiercely loyal to his friends. All three of those are endearing qualities.
And in the right framing, Endeavor's violence is also presented as comedic.
This scene is funny, but grabbing Hawks like that and lifting him off the ground is technically assault and it is intimidation. Replace Hawks with Rei and this scene changes drastically from funny to very unsettling. Replace him with Touya and it's a fight.
...
Where Endeavor really differentiates from Vi and Shizuo is marked by two important factors:
Shizuo, for all his claims at being unable to control his anger, has it very much under control around the people he cares about. He really only lets loose against a perceived threat.
Vi mostly has that same control even though she lost it for a moment, but she was also separated from her sister in an indirect punishment for her actions.
Endeavor does not have Shizuo's restraint nor did he face any immediate consequences like Vi.
Which brings us to Rei.
I have mixed feelings when it comes to Rei, and the absolute harshest opinion I have of her is that she is pathetic and she failed her children. And I know that's a very black and white, cold-hearted view, but hear me out because it's a lot more complicated than that.
Endeavor is ultimately responsible for his own actions, but Rei also had the option to deal with the problem when it started. When he started hitting her, she could and should and have taken the kids and run as fast as she was able and not looked back. No amount of financial security, family appearance, or whatever justification one finds in this scenario is worth it. She should not have tolerated that abuse against herself and she definitely should not have subjected her children to that. While there's nothing conclusive to say Endeavor was physically harming any of the kids aside from Shouto, not fighting for her autonomy/safety was inadvertently teaching all four of them this is how men treat their wives, women are supposed to tolerate this treatment, and a marriage like this is 'normal.'
And in the end, she straight up abandoned her children. We see from Shouto's point of view right before she attacked him with the tea kettle. She's talking to her mother on the phone, saying she 'can't take it anymore' and she just wants to 'run away from this life.' Well...considering she goes on to spend the next ten years in a psych ward and left her children to her abusive husband...she did get what she wanted. Ten years and she really didn't put any more effort in trying to get back to them? She knew Endeavor was hurting her youngest. Going home and protecting her babies should have been her priority. For a long time, I legitimately thought she was in Fujiya because she was considered unsafe to rejoin society whether she was a danger to herself or to others. When she shows up in Endeavor's hospital room, I stared at the screen and thought, "The fuck? She could discharge herself at any point?"
All right, now that I've gone over my hard-line point of view, let me dial back the judgment and consider what else is going on here:
Rei is a refrigerated character.
She has very little characterization beyond her abuse and being the victimized mother in Shouto's story, so we don't know all that much about her. In all fairness, her oldest son suddenly dying while she was hospitalized certainly would have contributed to her downward spiral and account for her prolonged hospitalization.
She tolerated her abuse longer than she should have, but it is possible:
She learned that from her own parents. Tolerating abuse is often a byproduct of generational trauma. Maybe her father treated her mother the same way and she grew up thinking this was normal.
Maybe the first time Endeavor hit her, she rationalized it into a point of acceptance where she told herself that everything was fine and that it was only the 'one time' and it wouldn't happen again, a sentiment she kept repeating every time it happened.
Maybe she was raised to believe ‘the man of the house is always right,’ and that is a mindset that is hard to break if instilled from childhood.
Her parents certainly didn’t seem all that supportive with what was going on, but we also don’t know how much she told them. We don't even know if that one phone call she had with her mom was the first time she reached out for help after years of pretending everything was fine or if this was was something she was repeatedly updating her parents about and those parents chose to be aloof to it.
Maybe she really did grow up in a loving home and just didn't know what to do when confronted with the violent relationship she found herself in.
Maybe she was gaslit into believing it wasn't abuse.
Maybe she really did report the abuse and the godforsaken, root-of-all-evil Safety Commission told her, "Your husband's a hero. Stay quiet and don't ruin that public image." Basically told her to suck it up. That is also a possibility, and one I think could be the most likely, but the series doesn't really go into just how corrupt the Commission was, so we're in headcanon territory.
Maybe she did try to take the kids and run but failed to get away. (Unlikely since it’s never mentioned in canon.)
Not everyone is fortunate enough to have an upbringing that instills the belief, 'if your partner hurts you, they are dead to you' and not everyone has the good fortune of a reliable support network that can help them recognize a bad situation and get them out of it.
Given how well-known Endeavor is to the public, maybe Rei was afraid no one would believe her about the abuse. "A hero would never do such a thing. She's making it up for attention. Her family was poor, so she must be a gold-digger trying to screw over her hero husband in the divorce proceedings."
There is also the important fact that Japan has a social stigma against divorce. Persevering for the sake of family stability and maintaining an ideal appearance is a deeply ingrained cultural norm, which does introduce a troubling power imbalance between a husband who works and a housewife who doesn't have her own independent income. We also have to remember that Rei and her family were financially dependent on Endeavor, so she may have feared the monetary fallout at the prospect of leaving him. Also, with the popularity of the hero ranking system, the No. 2 Hero's wife divorcing him would have been very public and potentially humiliating for all involved.
And we can’t ignore the fact that Endeavor systematically broke her down into a shell of a person who couldn't see a way out of her situation and was tormented to the point she had a psychotic episode and attacked Shouto, the very child she tried to protect. And this too could have contributed to her prolonged hospitalization if this was the final straw and she viewed herself as a failure of a mother.
Maybe it was a combination of two or several of the above factors.
At the end of the day, abuse is a multi-faceted beast, and just as the abuse comes in many forms, the victim can have any number of reasons for staying in their situation.
So even though I have my harsh opinion of Rei and I think she should have done more to protect her children, I do 100% sympathize with her. She is a victim and she in no way deserved what she went through.
But while her inaction wasn't the cause of the crisis in her family, it was definitely a contributor to how badly it got out of hand because whatever the reason Rei didn't expose Endeavor or try to take the children and leave him, that lack of accountability opened up the opportunity for him to rationalize his own twisted justifications for his actions. “It’s fine. She deserved it because ______. She was 'acting out.' She was overreacting. She doesn't know what she's talking about.” Whatever he needed to tell himself to believe he didn’t do anything wrong even though he knew he wasn’t fooling himself or anyone.
She didn't stand up to him. Their children couldn't stand up to him.
So he continued the physical abuse unchecked.
...
Moving on into the redemption arc.
After the Kamino Incident, Endeavor finally, finally, finally got that vaunted No 1. Hero spot he'd been chasing for two decades. But he didn't earn it the way he wanted to by proving he's the best of the best. All Might retired, so he won by default.
And then he finds it's just one spot further up on a ranking system that means absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things. So he looks back at what's really important and he sees the charred skeleton frame of a house he burned down.
One institutionalized wife
One dead son
One daughter who clings to the memories of a happier home
One estranged son
One son who only has a use for him as a teacher and not a parent and will probably drop him the second he no longer needs him
In spite of everything, I do genuinely think the man deserves some credit for at least being willing to make an attempt at reconciliation. Not a lot since he dug that hole himself, but let's face it, a lot of lesser people would have looked at that mess and thought, "Fuck it, no going back now," and continued business as usual. So the question becomes:
Is Endeavor trying to redeem himself out of a need to make himself feel better about everything he's done or is he truly doing it for the benefit of the people he's hurt?
I tentatively think/hope could be a mix of both--I believe there is a part of him that cares about his children--but it definitely skews more toward making himself feel better because there's never a moment before the redemption arc begins where he's isolated, thinking back on everything, and just has the appropriate, "What have I done?" revelation. If his remorse was genuinely all about his family, we would have had that 'crying in the hospital scene' a whole lot sooner.
I think if Horikoshi wanted to portray Endeavor's redemption as genuine remorse for what he did to his family, I think he would have put more of a focus on Endeavor actually seeing the impact of what he'd done and feeling the inner turmoil and regret. Not just Natsuo's anger but also seeing firsthand Shouto's isolation and complete lack of social skills as a result of his training or having a conversation with Fuyumi where she admits she never wants to marry or have children because she doesn't 'want to risk ending up like Mom.' Seeing the effects of his behavior, realizing it's his fault.
So no. While there may be a part of Endeavor that loves his children (or he tells himself that he does), his wanting to atone is inspired mainly by his self-worth. He realized the ends did not justify the means and he tries to fix it.
But either way, how does he go about it?
The biggest change he makes toward earning forgiveness is to his hero career, which tracks with his character. That's familiar territory, so it's easier for him to navigate. He takes a significantly gentler method of teaching/mentorship with Shouto and he tries a kinder approach with his fans. That's progress, but it's still avoidance of the main issue that is the rift he caused with the other members of the family.
His relationship with Fuyumi doesn't have much friction. Fuyumi clings to their family's happier memories. With Touya gone, she was the only child who could remember a childhood without fighting parents, abuse, and suffering siblings. In a twisted way, this is something she and Touya have in common. So it makes sense that she would be the one who's the most receptive to Endeavor's attempts to be a better father. She sees this change as their best chance at being a normal family again. Like Touya, she wanted her father back.
Natsuo is different. He was 3-4 years old when the toxicity in their household really began to spike and when the violence started. Incidentally, this is also when memory cells in the brain start to fully develop and form concrete memories. Compared to his older siblings, the abuse is all he knows and that is why he's the child who left and went low-contact. The only thing Natsuo's really done wrong is start family drama when there's company over for dinner. I mean, c'mon. That's just rude. Don't do that in front of guests.
While Endeavor makes attempts to better his training methods/fan interaction, what he doesn't do is call a family meeting to discuss things, not that this would have resolved anything by a long shot, but it would have established a baseline of where everyone in the family was at and whether or not forgiveness was even on the table at all. It is an extremely arrogant thought for Endeavor to think forgiveness for something of this magnitude is possible, and if he wanted to seek forgiveness (or to atone, whatever the hell that means) for the lifelong mistreatment of family, he should have been more prepared for the most abject, humble groveling to the people he wronged that he could manage.
He should have admitted to his mistakes and faults, laid out everything he'd done wrong, apologize for that as best he could, then express he wanted to repair their relationship and be a family again while also acknowledging that he understands if that is not possible. Lay down that groundwork, maybe be open to family therapy so that a professional third party can act as a mediator and provide impartial guidance, figure out where the boundaries are, acknowledge he can't give them back their ruined childhoods but he can *insert anything Fuyumi, Natsuo, and Shouto ask as recompense, even if it's just leaving their lives forever*, and listen for once to what his family is saying.
Instead, he tries to have normal conversations with his children as if nothing bad ever happened. He offers to come watch Shouto's remedial training like that's a totally ordinary thing for him to do. He tells Natsuo during the family dinner that he would like to try his cooking some time. That is a good olive branch! There is nothing wrong with saying that, but without that prior baseline conversation, it comes off as contrived and that's how Natsuo interpreted it. He sends flowers to Rei, also a good signal to send, but he should have done the the uncomfortable thing and contacted her through her physician to see if she's open to meeting with him for a conversation or sending her a letter she could choose to open at any time (or send back unopened.) That would have established that same baseline and helped move forward towards the atonement he wanted.
But he does the same thing he always does: He pretends the real issue just doesn't exist and he tries to control the situation to suit him.
Why?
Say it with me: He never knows what to say! He can't navigate complex emotions!
He doesn't try to find out if his family is even willing to forgive him, frankly because he's an emotional coward who doesn't want to hear the answer.
However, we cannot say he has no character development at all.
There is one thing worth noting around this point in the plot that I think is important to recognize. If Endeavor ever had any character development that was in favor of his redemption, it was when Natsuo was kidnapped and nearly killed, and it's not because he ran and hugged him in the street.
In this scene, he admits to Natsuo that his actions might as well have killed Touya.
This is a small thing, but it's also huge because you have to consider that up until this time, Endeavor has been gaslighting himself into believing it was Touya's fault for getting himself killed or Rei's fault for not doing as she was told and watching him. He could even have been irrationally blaming All Might for just being a barrier to his goals. Any warped excuse and justification he could think of to escape the blame.
It's not a lot, but he did finally give voice to the guilt that he is the reason he failed and his child died. He finally acknowledged that the blame lies squarely with him and no one else, and acknowledging he drove Touya to his own death means way more than just talking about his intentions to atone.
He took accountability here, at least within the family.
That is one point he's earned. We as the audience can begrudgingly concede that one.
But this progress is again stalled when Endeavor makes the decision that it would be best for his family if he distances himself from them. He chooses to build another house for them where they can all live together with their mother and away from his shadow.
The initial reaction I had to this decision was, "Okay, your solution is kicking them out of the only home they've ever known?" But then I considered that having those kids leave a house where they lived through a traumatic and stressful childhood was a good call. Natsuo already bailed, after all. And then there's Fuyumi... Yeah, you know what, maybe a conversation would have been appropriate here. Instead of finding out what they want, he goes and decides it for them like he always does.
Touya has a genetic disparity that prevents him from using his Quirk safely? Endeavor decides he shouldn't be a hero, disregarding any possibility of finding a potential workaround.
Shouto finally uses his fire at the Sports Festival? Endeavor has his whole speech that pretty much shows he has Shouto's entire life planned out after graduation.
He wants to do what's best for his family? He decides what's best for them.
And we're back to the big dumbass never knowing what to say and still running away from the main issue by making assumptions and decisions without actually considering the thoughts/opinions of the people around him and controlling the situation to his benefit.
He may have his intention to do better, but he has no idea what he's doing. He doesn't know how to relinquish his authority role.
And then we have Touya with his, "Bitch, you thought!" grenade. Or is it a nuke?
It's important to note is that failure to articulate emotion in a healthy way is a trait that is shared by all of the Todoroki family members.
Endeavor - the emotional coward who resorts to violence when confronted with an uncomfortable situation
Rei - the passive mother
Fuyumi - the peacekeeper and people-pleaser
Shouto - the child who was systematically deprogramed into an angry husk imitating his father that he has only recently started to recover from
Touya and Natsuo are the only two who actually have some pushback against the bullshit in their family. Touya's a whole kettle of insane fish who's warped psyche deserves a character analysis of its own, but the point is, even as a kid, he doesn't creep around his father or try to make peace with him. Natsuo also has no problem calling out Endeavor for everything that went wrong in his childhood, plus he moved out and went to college as soon as he could.
Touya - the unstable sociopath who shares his father's tendency to violently lash out while stuck with the mental fragility of his mother
Natsuo - the traumatized avoidant
Neither of them have a functional way of dealing with their issues. (In fact, Touya is so unhinged about it that the door has peaced out and is halfway down the street.)
Endeavor wanted to atone for what he did...by burying and not actually taking any real accountability until the unavoidable moment Touya is screaming down to him, "Is it because you became No. 1 that you finally paid attention to your family?"
Touya has a warped view of the world brought on by years of trauma, but he hit the nail on the head.
Endeavor's main motivation for atonement is for the self-satisfaction.
So we have the symbolism of Endeavor, who has always used his physical strength to solve his problems by beating them into submission and used his intimidating height to glare down at everyone beneath him, and then we have Touya standing on top of a mountain, shouting down. Endeavor's in a position where he's looking up at his dead child, who is arguably the broken bough, elephant in the room, core unavoidable reason a full atonement was never going to be possible, bringing about a twenty-year overdue reckoning.
And he once again doesn't know what to say.
As the story ends, this is where we leave him: Crippled, looking up at his dying child, and confronted by one of the lives he ruined. By choice, he's going to sit here and face what he did. These talks are not going to be pleasant. I doubt Touya is so burned out and exhausted that he doesn’t have the heart to spit out more of the lifetime of vitriol he’s built up.
I know a lot of fans were disappointed Horikoshi didn’t kill Endeavor off in the end, but I personally prefer to look at it this way:
Some characters deserve death.
But some deserve to live in despair.
...
To revisit Arcane, I think this quote neatly sums up Endeavor.
Natsuo is more like his father than he wants to admit...and it is both tragic and unsettling.
He does what he wants without regard for what the people around him want.
Sure, he'll go along with certain requests, like going to the family dinner because Fuyumi asked him to.
However, rather than be a polite host, he decides he'd rather embarrass his sister by being angry at their father all through said dinner and making things awkward for their guests. He didn't have to be there. Whoever he's talking to on the phone after the fact, maybe the girlfriend, he apologizes for bailing on their plans. He didn't even have to white-lie to Fuyumi. He straight up had other plans that night. So there are two ways you could look at this:
He conceded to a request to support his sister...then half-assed it.
Or he canceled his plans and went out of his way to be a prick.
He's not wrong for hating his father, that is 100% a normal reaction to an abusive parent, but he is wrong for not establishing his own concrete boundaries or respecting Fuyumi's.
Like Endeavor, Natsuo is pretty isolated within the family.
Mom’s out of the picture and contact with her is limited.
We all know what his relationship with his father is like.
His closest sibling 'died' when they were kids, but even then, Touya and Natsuo's relationship wasn't a good one. We know Touya spent years trauma-dumping on Natsuo, and little bro took it like a champ. Supporting one's siblings like that is admirable, but it does highlight a key difference between the brothers. Touya has memories of a happy childhood with their father. Natsuo does not. So he had to listen to his older brother crying for a past he knows nothing about, which had to have brought on a little resentment. "At least Dad loved you once. I never even got that much."
As stated above, Natsuo doesn't see eye to eye with Fuyumi. At least not enough that he respects her decision to forgive their father. Whether he supports that decision or not, he should love his sister more than he hates their father, and starting shit unprovoked over a dinner she asked him to be at is not a supportive decision.
His relationship with Shouto is hard to gauge. They were raised apart, sure, but they lived in the same house. So the fact that he didn't know Shouto's favorite food until he was fifteen is...odd. Natsuo never tried to have a conversation with him in passing? But I have a theory about that. With how Shouto behaved in the very beginning of the series, the mirror-image of their arrogant father, I think Natsuo had a, “Fuck, now there’s two of them," moment and actively avoided association with his younger brother. This may have contributed to him moving out even though he attends a college that's close enough that that he can casually stop by for dinner.
He Actually Does Get Violent.
Not with other people, thankfully, but he does slam his fist against the door in this scene, which is an act of aggression.
This makes for an intense moment in animation, sure, but if you saw a person do this in real life, you’d be nervous about where that fist is going next.
I already went over this in the Endeavor analysis that I made a few months back, but the gist of it is taking out your anger on inanimate objects is unhealthy because you're training your brain to associate anger with violence, which has the potential to make it harder to dissociate in the long run.
In his own way, he did abandon his family.
Fuyumi tells him to leave the family circumstances to her....and he just left her to it? She went to college to become a teacher and made a career work in spite of living in a volatile home. The series doesn't say where Natsuo is a student at, but he clearly lives close enough to home that he can drop by for a visit, so it's not like he went to some prestigious university out of town.
So yeah. Left his remaining brother and sister to their father.
The other point, though, is he's canonically studying medical welfare.
Medical welfare is the consideration of patient wellbeing, preserving individual dignity, promoting quality of life, and taking a holistic approach to healthcare that applies mental and emotional care to a patient, not just physical.
So it's ironic this is where his brother ends up and he says absolutely nothing about it. Nothing about promising to come see him, nothing about asking the staff if this really the best arrangement they could come up with, no promises to Touya that he'll figure something out. He just ghosts and, like their father, that is really hypocritical.
In the end, he puts his own hate and feelings above everyone else’s.
This one's pretty closely related to my first point, but it does bear reiterating for the finale. Natsuo's decision to never see his father again is ultimately going to hurt his family more than it's going to spite Endeavor. Going no-contact is a healthy choice and I don’t fault him for it at all. But if he sticks to it, it’s going to lead to some serious ramifications down the road.
If he's strict enough to refuse to be in the same vicinity as Endeavor:
He won’t attend Touya’s funeral and support his grieving mother and siblings if Endeavor will be there.
Since we see in the epilogue Rei stays with Endeavor, Natsuo visiting her is going to be complicated.
If Fuyumi gets married, she might want her father at the wedding. Is Natsuo going to skip his sister’s wedding out of spite?
If Shouto gets married and decides to let their father be there, same story.
If Endeavor outlives Rei, will Natsuo miss her funeral?
And finally, Natsuo might have to come to terms with the fact his own children may want to meet their grandfather, which is a decision he can only control until they’re legal adults. He can tell them how much of a monster Endeavor was all he wants, but those kids may still be curious about meeting the man in person, especially if they hear stories from other family members and know the former No. 2 and No. 1 is their grandfather.
I’m not saying Natsuo should forgive Endeavor, or even stop being angry with him because he has every right to his anger. But if he still wants a relationship with the rest of the family, he is going to have to exercise some form of compromise. Especially with his children because he unfortunately has all the hallmarks to become the next Kotaro Shimura. This is a society where kids want to be heroes, and then there's Natsuo who has a history with the dark side of hero society, no matter the good Shouto does.
im sick of my parents trying to reconcile
What happened few minutes prior to this:
Endeavor: Move your feet. I want to sit.
Rei: Make me.
Omg i don’t know if you already have an idea for what to do.. but if you don’t yet could you make Dabi a winged dragon like creature for Dekus creature chronicles? your art is so amazing and i’ve always loved the dragon dabi aus and i’m curious to see your take on it. if not that’s totally okay i’m sure i’ll love it no matter what you think of since i’ve loved everything so far the details are so amazing 🥹💕
This is very sweet- I am afraid I'm not in the fandom to be familiar with AUs, but dragons are always a favorite pick amongst reimaginings. There happens to be only one true dragon in this particular story... but I can show you the Todoroki's now that I have them finished- (I plotted them as a unit)
You can learn a little more of the myths under the cut if you like :)
part 9! Nav: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8
tidbits under cut
Dabi was the lynchpin design-and his family was built around him! They are all creatures of reincarnation, but with various meanings-
Canon Touya threw around some strong words about being reborn. The way he seems mentally stuck to his childhood, felt like a Phoenix who can't (or perhaps won't) allow himself to grow beyond a certain point, doomed to repeat his self-destruction. Like the other villains though - he's a little more morally grey in this story.
Firebird (Slavic) are often harbingers of either good fortune, doom- or unattainable goals in their tales. If that doesn't sound like Endeavor I'm not sure what does. They differ from phoenix in which they are 'always on fire', but they don't self immolate - they're just 'built like that'.
Tsurara onna (icicle woman) are created from the loneliness of single men during the winter time. When a man gazes longingly at a strong, beautiful icicle, they may appear. They disappear in the summer, and may reappear in winter. The love stories invariably end in tragedy. Considering Rei's dynamic to Enji, it felt fitting.
A Snegurochka (Russian- Snow Maiden) the fairytales often echo tsurara onna, of maiden that melts due to "shenanigans" (not always tied to love stories).
Simurgh (Persian) is more of a reach - you can really dive into their different lore and variations, but they are similar to phoenix in which they also immolate to reincarnate after a very long time. They have connections to both fire and water.
There's no myth creature equivalent of both fire and ice. Yet in canon, Shoto is the only one who doesn't provide himself a hero title. His name is his identity. So- he's the only "undefined" creature. There's a number of myths you could read him as if you wanted (he doesn't care).
... Dabi's pheonix fire also plays into forming the character Juzo (Not that anyone asked- this is reaaaaaaaallly reaching into the semantics on the yliaster, or prima materia that forms the philosophers stone- which mentions pheonix fire purification as a metaphor... ah don't worry about it).
Gashadokuro's are the scariest creature I could think of for a nomu.
Rei: This is not what I signed up for. Children, sure. Exercise equipment, definitely not.
Endeavor: Are you done?
Rei: Using your wife as resistance—you ought to be ashamed.
Endeavor: If you want to go back inside—
Rei: You know when most couples try something new, it’s usually a sex thing.
Endeavor: Holy shit, Rei.
Rei: However, since I don’t see myself getting out of this, we might as well get it over with, so mush!
...
Deities above, I hope these two were silly once.
I have a headcanon that since he does have a personal driver, Endeavor does not know nor has he ever learned how to drive. In Japan, you can't get a driver's license until you're eighteen. He would have graduated UA by then, and after multiple years of using public transportation, he probably had the practical mindset of, "If it ain't broke," and just never bothered until he was successful enough to hire someone. (Actually, headcanon that he just lived in his office until he made it big.)
In contrast, Rei definitely knows how to drive and prefers to floor it whenever possible.
He got into a car with her behind the wheel once and vowed never again.
Keeping with my headcanon that Endeavor, like Shouto, cannot comprehend euphemisms or metaphors:
Rei: Hey, people are like hardboiled eggs. Sometimes you can get the shell off easily, other times you gotta work at it a little bit.
Endeavor: ....what?
At this point, if I can imagine Touya and Shouto saying it, I can also see young Rei and Endeavor saying it.
Rei Todoroki: The Unintentional Enabler
TodoFam Discussion, you know what to expect. Pardon my rambling.
We know Enji Endeavor Todoroki is bad and abused his family, which includes Rei. Nobody is arguing that. Rei Todoroki, as the mother of the family is no better; NOT because she had ill intentions, but because being not good enough runs rampant in the entire Todoroki family. Rei Todoroki, for all her good intentions, failed as a mother.
As she takes and accepts her share of the blame in the story, I want to explore that! Rei is a really interesting character that is martyred by the fandom (understandably) but I want to explore her wrongs and shortcomings more. I love to do that with Enji, so his better half gets the same treatment.
Unreliable Narrators; throughout the series, the kids give their insight on the situation of their parents. All of which unreliable, because kids never know the full story. Least trustworthy of all is Dabi, a liar who will do anything and everything to get back at Endeavor, at the expense of his own siblings. He’ll twist the truth into something that benefits him (Hawks killing Twice) and hurt everybody in the process. The only person, therefore, that I am going to take at face value with what happened to Rei is Rei herself. The kids' perspectives are valid of course but they’re not Rei, so she’s the only one I’m listening to.
“Eugenics”; People love to throw the word around without realising what it actually means when referring to Enji wanting a child with both ice and fire, but let’s run with it for this thread. Rei comes from a family of, by this logic, eugenicists who have tried to keep the bloodline pure, at least since Quirks made an appearance because of their distaste of heteromorphs and general superiority complex. The concept of marrying people for status, genetic reasons and money is the norm to her, every corner of the Himura family does that. If she hadn’t married Enji, she would’ve either married the next person fit for her or be married to a distant relative. Thus, she is just in as much fault for agreeing to a Quirk Marriage as Enji is for even thinking of it.
“She had no choice”; Incorrect, Rei says as much. She had every choice, and Enji was the best choice when it comes to the Himura standard. Powerful Quirk, self-made high status as Endeavor and a lot of hard-earned money to provide a financial comfortable life. Rei was fully aware that she was agreeing to a Quirk Marriage, and had absolutely no problems with it, despite them being frowned upon by society, because all the Himura do this sort of thing. Rei and Enji had a miai/omiai, which is incorrectly translated as an arranged marriage. It’s a formal, traditional way of meeting someone with the serious consideration of marriage, which includes the parents/guardians. Like matchmaking. It is NOT a forced marriage, it’s a cultural difference that the west doesn’t have, so this set up is NOT coercive/weird. There are different steps to it, and one of them is ‘kotowari’, a refusal. Rei had that option but she didn’t take it “for the sake of her family”. Enji never forced her into it, her family did pressure her, but at the end of the day, it was her choice to accept or refuse.
Rei too wanted a child for a purpose; A second child was her desire that Enji agreed to, so that Touya and Fuyumi could support each other. A natural desire for siblings of course, but in the end, Fuyumi was conceived with the intent to be a child for her siblings to depend on her, which led her to being the older sister desperately trying to fix a family she once had, something she takes from Rei (‘smile through it’). Just as Touya, Natsuo and Shoto were conceived for a purpose, so was Fuyumi, and as unintentional as it was, Rei placed that heavy burden on Fuyumi, which Enji acknowledges and apologises for.
“Rei didn’t want more kids”; We don’t know if she didn’t want more kids, but we know that she was worried that more kids would negatively affect Touya because he now knew what Enji was aiming for. You can still want more kids while not acting on that want for various reasons. All we know is she was worried (rightfully so), but she saw that Enji wasn’t thinking rationally anymore (yippee mental health).
“Enji raped Rei”; I see why people think and interpret it that way. I don’t, for the simple fact that Rei herself never accuses him of such. Horikoshi is VERY show AND tell (emphasis on tell) storytelling style; if he doesn’t hold back on showing little kids getting beaten up (Deku, Tomura, Toga, Shoto, Shoji), he’d have no qualms in making Rei say that that’s what Enji did. Again, the kids are unreliable narrators and don’t know what happened between their parents, Natsuo doesn’t even know Enji as a father or person. Enji became terrifying to Rei because he was spiralling into insanity, and anybody who’s had a mentally unstable relative in their household will tell you, that’s terrifying. You end up walking on eggshells unless you’re willing to confront and deal with the problem, and until after Shoto’s birth, Rei simply didn’t.
Smile and pretend it’s all okay; Rei, seeing that her husband was spiralling into insanity because of Touya’s injuries, his inability to beat All Might and general stress, saw that emotion was taking over his rationality (yippee mental health). Instead of pushing back against Enji and try to make him see reason (cough cough like Touya cough cough), she decided to fulfil her duties as a mother and wife best she could while smiling through it. In her desire to keep her family together instead of confronting the problem at the very beginning (very hard but necessary thing to do), she enabled Enji, and by the time he started training Shoto and things got violent, it was too late. That’s where Fuyumi gets it from.
When Enji couldn’t do it anymore, neither could Rei; Up until Touya’s attack of Shoto (who Rei was holding), it seems and is my interpretation that only Enji ever tried to dissuade Touya from using his Quirk. Enji is always the one shown to try and talk him out of it, encourage him to make friends, and Rei never seems to be the one having those conversations with Touya. After Touya attacked Rei and Shoto and Enji had to stop him, he decided to seclude Shoto from his siblings. Rei (rightfully) points out that he’s running away from his fatherly responsibilities. Touya just wants Enji to look at him, but Enji is scared of enabling his behaviour further. All Enji knows is the hero world, he only knows what he's self-taught ever since his father died. He has no knowledge on how to deal with this situation. He can’t deal with it anymore, so he tells Rei that he’ll hire someone to help her with the house and kids, and to keep an eye on Touya. The one single time we’re shown her trying to do this, she fails horribly, which was always going to happen; Touya calls her out on her bystanding, enabling and being complicit in the entire thing (a reoccurring theme in MHA) but is incorrect about the details of what happened (as kids typically are). Nonetheless, Rei is unable to stop her preteen son from harming himself, and after that single scene, we have no idea if she tried ever again. Rei never had a chance to stop Touya. Unlike with Shoto, Fuyumi or even Natsuo, we are never shown a scene of Rei being tender to or holding Touya, not as a baby, not even growing up. The most tender we see her is when he’s Dabi and literally burning them all to death. Enji was and always will be Touya’s entire world, and Rei quite simply never could replace him. If Touya wasn’t going to listen to Enji, he certainly wasn’t going to listen to Rei. This is its own topic, but Touya is never shown smiling at nor looking for Rei’s attention, only ever Enji’s.
Always at home, yet never there; Rei is a stay-at-home mother, an important and demanding role that's severely overlooked and underappreciated. However, in that, even with help from the matron, she fails at, especially when Shoto is born. Enji is the breadwinner; he needs to be out and doing his job as a Pro-Hero because that’s his responsibility and that’s what how he provides for his family. And considering that he’s never around (shown by how Touya says he’s always waiting for him to have a day off) if it’s not training Shoto, Rei is the primary influence on the kids. But because she was always focusing on Shoto (like Enji), she ended up unintentionally neglecting Touya, Fuyumi and Natsuo (just like Enji). In School Briefs, Natsuo even reflects on how he started disliking Shoto for taking their mother away (because he’s a kid and didn’t know what was going on) and wanted his father’s attention too, who is a stranger to him. Just like Enji, Rei unintentionally neglected her other kids because she was focusing on Shoto (for obvious reasons).
“Enji was always violent and beat his family”; Again, no. He started becoming violent at home when beginning Shoto’s training. No other instance is shown. Still absolutely horrendous, let’s not minimise that. In the early days, Rei watched Enji and Touya train, which was their way of bonding, and she’s peaceful. He only got brutal with Shoto, and by this point, it was too late to make Enji stop. The one of two times we’re shown Enji hitting Rei, he’s pushing her out of the way that turns into a slap because she’s trying to make him go easier on Shoto. Different topic but, “he’s already five” in my interpretation is because Touya was further ahead than Shoto by this point. Rei was blindsided by Enji’s brutality with Shoto, because he wasn’t like that before. She tried smiling and going with the flow until it was too late. Based on the hospital scene after the Touya reveal, it’s clear that they never spoke in a way that mattered. The two times she tried, Enji was already spiralling and it was too late.
No communication; Enji is a mentally unwell man with heaps of unresolved trauma and issues. Rei was born into an old money family that had lost its influence and prestige a long time ago, that comes with a heavy sense of duty. They’re also traditionally Japanese to a fault. I remember seeing a thread discussing how the Todoroki are a criticism of the traditional Japanese family. Point is, both Rei and Enji leaned into their gender roles so heavily that instead of being a team, they had absolutely no communication, to the point that when Rei was unable to stop Touya, she didn’t even tell Enji. Understandably so, she would’ve been afraid of his anger and his blaming of everyone around him for his own shortcomings (inferiority complex go brrrr). Due to that, as far as Enji was aware (not at all), Rei was being successful in stopping Touya from training at Sekoto Peak. He could just focus on being a Pro-Hero and training Shoto. So when he realised that Rei had failed (like him), he snapped and projected his anger unto her for failing as a mother (like he failed as a father). His frustration is valid, his anger and violence is not. His anger would be valid if it was healthy and correctly managed, but it’s not, so he slaps her in front of Fuyumi, Natsuo and Shoto. That’s the straw that broke the camel’s back, and after that, the incident with Shoto happens.
“Rei should’ve left with the kids”; Rei was never going to leave, with or without the kids. Rei was brought up with a sense of duty as a wife and mother. She didn’t leave until Enji literally sent her away for injuring Shoto (which she instantly regretted). In her desperation to uphold her family values, she stayed. If she tried to leave, the only children willing to go with her would maybe be Natsuo and Shoto. Touya would rather burn alive than be taken away from his father, Fuyumi would be desperate to keep the family together even at that young age, and if Touya and Fuyumi aren’t going, Natsuo wouldn’t. Shoto is shown to desire a happy family as well, and he’s the only one at this point in time that Enji wouldn’t let be taken away. I’ve already talked about before if Rei could’ve left (I think she could’ve, but Enji would’ve been angry at her while letting her leave), but she simply never would have.
Too little, too late; We don’t know Rei's relationships with her parents. It’s distant for sure, and based on traditional values, she was most likely brought up by her mother more than her father (thus she tried to do the same). When she realised that she couldn’t deal with the kids anymore because they were all looking too much like Enji, she called her mother. We have no way of knowing if her mother knew what was going on or if this was the first time Rei reached out to her. Based on what we’re shown, I’m assuming she never spoke about it. But it was too late at this point. Just like Enji, Rei didn’t notice herself spiraling until this very moment, and it ended up with her reacting to Shoto and hurting him, just like how Enji reacted to Rei’s failure and hurt her (although Rei instantly regretted it, and it took Enji a whole freaking decade to realise; mental health is weird like that).
Gone for an entire decade; This was the best thing for Rei so she could get the help she needed, but her being gone for a decade with little contact with the kids, as necessary as it was for herself, made them feel abandoned. Shoto and Natsuo rightfully blame Enji, Touya kinda, well, died, and Fuyumi filled Rei’s role by ‘smiling through it’ and sweeping the problems under the carpet. The kids were never barred from seeing Rei by Enji as far as we’re aware, probably the hospital let the family know when they’d be able to visit her, which Fuyumi and Natsuo do, Shoto doesn’t until after the Sports Festival, and Enji does very often to bring her flowers but never visiting her (obviously). Only then, distanced from the fire, can she reflect and attempt to understand how all of this happened without getting hurt. That’s why the hospital scene is even possible.
“She recognised Touya during the reveal”; Personal pet peeve. She did not. Nobody did. They all thought him dead (even Enji who had obsessively looked for him; again, lots of telling, Horikoshi, not much showing), he looks and sounds completely different, fire is a common Quirk. Rei realised it was Touya after he LITERALLY SAID THAT’S WHO HE WAS. Neither Rei nor Enji realised he was their firstborn until he revealed himself as such.
Conclusion (it’s just me rambling at this point); Rei is half of the problem.
Take her out of the image and the TodoFam timeline doesn’t happen. It takes two to tango and Rei enabled Enji by knowingly agreeing to a Quirk Marriage and the two never getting to understand each other. Rei says as much, she doesn’t understand how his mind works, they never talked about their pasts or got to know each other on a deeper basis. Rei was in an impossible situation, and there’s a million ‘she should’ve’ statements, but none of them are relevant because she simply didn’t. She’s a victim as much as she is an unintentional abuser and enabler. The road to hell is paved with good intentions while the road to heaven is paved with good action; Rei tried her best, but like with the entire TodoFam, it wasn’t enough.
Rei is such a fascinating character, and the western fandom doesn’t allow her the depth and nuance she deserves. There’s no such thing as a perfect victim, and Rei is by no means perfect. She tried, but in the end, she wasn’t a good mother. She wasn’t present (for obvious reasons) until the Touya reveal, and even then, she puts the weight of being the family’s hero on her youngest. Enji was absolutely terrible and an abuser, Rei was one of his victims, but she unintentionally enabled him and became an abuser in her own right.
That’s why she takes her half of the responsibility as one of the two parents, that’s why she stops having good intentions and ACTS instead by trying to cool Touya down from exploding. Enji didn’t want her to die, and she didn’t want either of them to die neither. Instead of avoiding the problem like she and the family had for years, she finally ACTED when she was needed, her and Enji finally working together as the parents for a moment in their direst moment. Enji knows he’s the problem, that’s why he builds a new house for them to live in while he stays at the Abode, that’s why he always has that dream where his family is happy without him, and he wants them to be happy. And despite that, despite telling Rei she doesn’t need to bear this, she makes the choice to be present and strong, just like how Enji has stopped running away.
TL;DR, Rei is a deeply flawed, imperfect character that is wonderfully nuanced, like the rest of the TodoFam.
Trying her best but never good enough.
Four children are mine
And I love my four children:
An arrow to ward away the darkness
aimed for the light of the dawn
The winter, who brings the night again, beautiful and longer
Next the summer,
who returns the sun at its zenith
Small is the new leader with clear sky and dusk rain in his eyes.
Four children are mine
And with four comes death
The arrow flies too high from the bow
The arrow flies but falls to darkness
From a shrine in the mountain, he aims for me.
My son haunts the mountain near the peak
I fear the mountain I cannot climb
I fear the arrow meant for me.
Winter settles quietly
Summer turns away from me
The leader makes a mirror of my heart
I tell my son I love him
And I look in the mirror yet I cannot face it but to watch it crack
My son is my spitting image
I tell my son I love him
I tell my son
Without looking into his eyes,
I tell my son I love him
As the arrow flies.
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