Hi :3

please, don’t bother reading. it’s just another tw’d vent post. what’s the point.

god, i’m useless.

what kind of captain thinks like this? what kind of captain puts himself first? i’m pathetic.

i just want to be good for someone. i just want to be someone’s first choice, their favorite.

i don’t want to be a leftover. i don’t want to be left behind.

i don’t want to be alone again.

i can’t be alone again.

my thighs hurt so much. my head and fingers and toes are throbbing, probably from blood loss. i can’t keep doing this to myself.

i can’t keep running from my problems.

i want to be yours, for you to know who's heart you have been given in a gift wrap box, love letter attached. i still cant bring myself to sign the note metaphorical so i leave a trail of bread crumbs in hopes you notice who i really am, that you wont be able to ignore the similarities and i will have never had to sign the note. its cowardly i know.. but its better then nothing.. -⛓

how sweet, dear. perhaps i might have a clue..

am i a recurring thought to anyone

tw.

my skin is scrubbed raw and red. my head is pounding and i’m shaking feebly. as i run the water, washing the sink out, watching red and clear mix and swirl down the drain, and as i wipe the spit from my lips, flushing the toilet and watching nothing but bile swirl down it’s own respective drain, i slump agains the wall.

is this really where i’ve gotten myself in life?

a scalding hot shower, the warmth pelting my raw skin, sounds appropriate for not being able to handle an entire hour.

The anons you get are really strange and questionable I Think

They're all strangely parasocial and kinda laying on you until you fix their problems with a couple responses

Hope you're feeling okay

-💫

hello! perhaps, just a little. i’m a people pleaser to my core, so i didn’t notice if anyone was laying on me.

i do feel alright! thank you.

call me your pretty boy.

your angel, your darling, your slut.

i don’t care, as long as i’m yours.

infatuation runs through my veins, seeps from my pores, coats my skin and nails. and even if you aren’t the least bit as infatuated with me, as i am with you, well…isn’t that part of the fun?

small world, huh, captain? 'm sure you could connect the dots. use that pretty head of yers.

...looks like you've picked up after yourself these days. wonder if you're still as easy as you used to be.

– ✘

easy? what ever do you mean? “picked up after myself”? connect the dots?

oh, now i’m more curious then ever.

pick your poison (version of me):

— fuzzy-brained, whorish puppy

— self-hating, disgusting mutt

— your loyal, possessive dog.