"I Had A Wife But They Took Her In The Divorce" Is A Groucho Marx Level Joke. Pure Vaudeville. It's Semantically

I was definitely not built for human interaction I was built to stare at turkey vultures circle in the sky above the river

Bitch “I’m” On 12 Ego Deaths

your freak-of-nature boyfriend that we locked up in a high security lab is loose in the fucking facility send help before he kills us all

This isn't even a hate message this is just the funniest possible thing in the universe. I'm losing my shit laughing right now

In my defense your honor: tch. Like I'd ever tell you

gives you a thumbs up and sparkle-like effects surround it and i get scared cus it never did that before

hey what’s up guys i’m still trapped in this abandoned grain silo

I wish I had a hairy chest like yours😞😔

don’t worry smooth king, you are hydrodynamic and can easily outmaneuver maritime predators