(flirting) I’m Going To Bite You

☀️

i think I bother everyone by being alive

Doesn't matter how much effort I put in, right? It's hard to love me.

normalize having favorites. in fact, normalize me being your favorite. normalize loving me more than you’ve ever loved anyone else. please please please please please please

not actually alive, just a corpse walking in a suit of flesh

Jealousy is often portrayed as a toxic and/or abusive trait.

And I just want to talk about that for a minute, especially for those who struggle with jealousy because I think a lot of you might feel bad when you see those posts.

Jealousy itself is not inherently bad. Again, like with other emotions, the emotion itself is not bad. It's your behaviours that might become a problem. Jealousy is actually a really normal and common emotion. I feel like by constantly demonizing "jealousy" that people are less likely to get help for managing it when it gets out of hand for them, and this could be harmful to them in the long run.

For example, there's a difference between "How dare you talk to another friend! Clearly you don't care about me." and "I'm feeling a bit insecure. Could you please give me some reassurance?" There's a difference between pushing your partner to not have relationships outside of you, and communicating with your partner about how you can work together to make you feel less like you're being replaced.

Actions like not allowing a partner/friend to have other relationships because of jealousy, or blowing up at them because someone flirted with them or etc are not okay (I also want to say that if you've done things I've said are "not okay" in the past, that you aren't bad or beyond healing. You can learn from those mistakes and do better). But the emotion itself is not bad and there are healthy ways to handle it.

If you struggle with jealousy, you are not a bad person. You are not automatically abusive or anything like that.

I used to do personality tests a lot, looking for something to tell me who I really am, an answer that's satisfying.

People would describe me and it never felt real, but who was I to dispute it?

I never felt like I knew who I was and every description of me, from golden admiration to scathing hatred, never felt like it was me.