Emily : I Like To Think Of Myself As A "free Spirit". It's Way More Classier Than "out Of Fucking Control".

Emily : Once my baby was being annoying so I put it in the basement.

Emily : Then I forgot about it and decided that I didn't want a basement anymore, so I got rid of the door and decided that I will do the rest later. When child protective services came, they couldn't go in the basement, so they just chilled around in my house.

Therapist :

JJ, facepalm : She's talking about the Sims, please don't call the police.

JJ : Fuck

Hotch : Language !

Spencer : Shit

Hotch : Language !

Emily : Who the fuck do you think you're calling a bitch, you ass ?

Hotch : Language !

Morgan : Now that's one crazy motherfucker

Hotch : Language !

Garcia : What the frick frack tickity tic tac snik snak bro ?

Hotch :

Hotch : What the fuck ?

Morgan : Legends says that one night, Emily was fed after midnight, and she shifted into a Gremlin that never melted away at the sunlight.

Emily : I have an excellent memory ! Name one time I forgot something.

Morgan : You left me in a Walmart parking lot like, three weeks ago.

Emily : I did that on purpose, try again.

Judge : How do you plead ?

Emily, looks over to Hotch

Hotch, mouthing : Not guilty

Emily : Hot Milky

Hotch, hitting the desk with his head : For god sake- Just lock her up.

Therapist : And remember, you are your own worst enemy.

Reid, somehow proud : Undefeated dude

Emily : I just want someone to take me out

Spencer : Like on a date or with a sniper ?

Emily : Surprise me.

Reid : Affection is DISGUSTING.

Reid : Drown me in it

Garcia, trying to stop the unsub : Killing someone is really weird, like no one will like you if you do that

Rossi : You shouldn't use a straw.

Luke : Yes I know, it's bad for the environment blabla.

Rossi : Mostly yes. But right now, it's because it's siCK TO EAT SPAGHETTI LIKE THAT.