donkoogrr
168 posts
Latest Posts by donkoogrr
Today's the anniversary.
Goodbye Jaybin, you were a goddamn delight.
Temporal distortion? Have you checked the date?
Why are my setting telling me that I'm thirteen years old last I check I am not??????¿??????
Sometimes I remember that Karl Kesel (creator of 90's Kon El) said that he thought Superboy would be bisexual because "...his sexual appetite would be quite large and far-ranging..."
And I'm like.
Bruh.
That's some stereotype right there, ayup. And yep, it fits his character to be a horny teen. But also. That's such a stereotype. And I'm glad you want him to be part of the lgbtqa+! It makes me feel like you genuinely didn't know what you said was a stereotype.
Oh, the nineties.
I love this, I love this, I love this, I-!
This is my favorite kinda thing. Taking accepted canon and asking yourself, "but what if Unreliable Narrator? What if fronting?" Taking fanon interpretations and tilting them sideways a bit, looking at character traits from a different perspective.
And crossovers are just so much damn fun to do this with! The rules of engagement change around. The timeline becomes more of a suggestion. There is resting potential energy in every interaction!
The idea that John Constantine uses his rumpled, chain-smoking, tired lech of a person as a work uniform? Genius. Brilliant. Machiavellian.
Batman's disguise is being stupid. Superman's disguise is glasses. John Constantine's disguise is business casual fatherhood.
I am so excited for more of this! I've not seen this be explored before!
I love love all your writings!!
I like your depictions of John Constantine.
I'd like to see you write the sad trenchcoat persona as just that a persona in the same fashion as how Brucie Wayne is a persona.
Maybe he's been the de-aged Danny/Dannies father for years and is an actual functional adult. The sad trenchcoat is just used to keep people from calling on him to frequently because he's a dad and has dad-like things to do.
He could help tim with the time stream thing, like 'oh, yeah that does look like Bruce. Alright kid pack a bag we're going in the time stream I know a guy. No Nightwing I'm not joking this looks like solid proof'.
Maybe Bruce has a oh shit he's actually competent and could kill me, that's hot moment. (Kids I have found your other father, help me get him home)
"I would love to offer more of my time to waste on monitor duty, but I have a previous engagement. A particular fit lady needs help getting her dress on the floor. The cloth always gets stuck on her horns. " John leers, wagging his eyebrows at the grimaces his words cause.
He takes a puff of his cigarette, inhaling the smoke like a drowning man. He never smokes at home, not with Danny's sensitive lungs or Dani's general disgust at smoking, so he only had the chance when called away on missions.
Plus, Danny was trying out for ballet soon, and he wasn't going to ruin his son's chances of being a star because of his own poor habits.
It helped that the rest of the heroes believed he was consistently pumping nicotine into his system. Rather irresponsible for the hero to publicly commit frowned-upon activities - at least in the States. Back home, no one cared that much.
It didn't matter that the Justice League was a global team; the main hard hitters and founders were nearly all American, and they tended to uphold those social expectations, either subconsciously or not.
One more reason why they shouldn't bother John, he can't have him smoking at a big awards ceremony or seen going through an entire pack of cigarettes mid-fight. Oh no.
John Constantine was one of the best magic users of this universe, but he was a last resort. There were plenty of other magic users like Zatanna, Dr. Fate, Zatara, or even Etrigan that came to mind first.
John was likely too busy drowning his misery in bottles or the arms of any willing partner. That's what they all thought.
Or more importantly than what he wanted them to think.
"Well, this has been a time." He announces, snapping his fingers to open a portal to his house. "But I have to run. My lady needs a knowledgeable hand to help her-"
"Enough," Batman growls. Though he has complete control over his emotions, John can tell he's irritated by the meaningless detail. He smirks as the hero waves a hand, "Just go."
He offers the rest of the meeting room a cheeky two-finger salute as he struts out, letting the portal close behind him so his trench coat flares dramatically. It's a nice view, he's sure, but it's also unnecessarily showy, and he is sure at least three pairs of eyes are rolling at his exit.
A chuckle escapes his mouth, straightening from his slouch to properly stand straight and bend it far enough to pop. Goodness, his act always leaves him with a sore upper back; maybe he shouldn't hunch over so much, even if he was playing the part of a no-good punk.
John only had a few seconds to shiver at his own thoughts- he was a punk. A real one! He was in a band!- before he heard the tell-tell sign of a rapidly approaching double set of footsteps echo down the hall. He scrambles to fling his lit cigarette into a water portal, chucking the pack for double security, while summoning a random suitcase from thin air.
All that's left is his rather eye-catching coat, a little too worn down and old to work well with his well-put-together outfit underneath. Without it, John has a clean, pressed white shirt, a respectful tie, and a pair of slacks that make more than one head turn as he walks.
All in all, he looks like the office businessman his worthless father always wanted to be.
John throws off his coat over a chair at the same time the door is thrown open with a pair of excited yells. "Welcome home, Dad!"
A grin stretched across his face before he could think about it, feeling his heart swell at the sight of them, as he knelt down, arms open wide. Two tiny bodies slam into him without a second of hesitation, nearly knocking John backwards.
He lets out a soft grunt as Dani's arms attempt to wrap around his left arm and right shoulder. She clashes against Danny, who's trying to bury himself into John's right side, little face squished against one of John's pecs, like a bunny burrowing into the snow.
"Hello, my little lambs!" He gushes, squeezing the kids close. "How was your day with the House of Mystery? Did you two behave?"
"They were angels," Black Orchid confirms, gliding into the room at a much slower pace. They had their regular, impassive expression on their faces, but John could tell that Orchid was happy with the kids by the way they gently tapped the tops of the children's black hair.
"Dad! Dad! Now that you're home, can we please go get my new ballet shows?" Danny begs, bouncing on his toes.
For a moment, John doesn't see his son, but rather his own blue eyes staring up at his father, when he was also five, begging to join Lily, the next-door neighbor, in beginners' ballet class.
His father had beaten him nearly to death for wanting such a girly interest. It was the last time they spoke about it. It was also the last time John ever bothered asking to start new hobbies.
"Dad! Dad! Can I do Karate?" Dani asks then, snapping John from his memories better left buried, as she presses her check against her brother's in an attempt to get John's attention. "I want to break a board with my fist!"
He gives the children another squeeze, laughing at the squeals he gets. "Of course you can do karate, little lamb. We're going to get your brother his shoes, and then I'll find a gym that offers the classes at the same time."
"I already provided that service." Orchid cuts in, holding a flyer for Flying Graysons' gym, founded and run by the eldest Wayne in Gotham. "I took the liberty of signing Danny up for a class with Casnadra Wayne, and Dani will join Duke Thomas's class. It starts in a week."
"Plenty of time to go get them everything they need and a new book series for our bedtime stories," John announces, loosening his arms so his children can cheer and bounce up and down in excitement. His knee is starting to cramp up, but he ignores it so he can hold his kids.
It's moments like these, so small and mundane, that John is grateful he thought of his persona. When he first learned how to use the magic he was gifted, he always made himself available for any crisis.
This was before the Justice League days, so anyone who sought him out was familiar with the occult world. He adored helping, and he built an incredible amount of skill and knowledge in magic, but soon John was facing disaster after disaster, dragging his exhausted body from one place to another.
Those who came searching for him never cared. They wanted John to jump at the drop of a hat. He tried for years to always be ready, always be willing, but years of isolation and desperate battles tried him to the core.
Then he took in Danny and Dani, finding the pair of babies in a basket at the feet of the Sarcophagus of Forever Sleep. He had gone to investigate the legends of the famous King Pariah Dark, only to find what he assumed were originally sacrifices, well and truly alive.
Their names were attached to their feet with a letter written by a Jazz Fenton begging the two to grow and live well. She had died to save them. In her honor, John kept their names.
Daniel "Danny" Fenton and Danielle "Dani" Fenton. He often wondered what Jazz had been to the kids, with their identical last names. It is a question he will never get the answer to.
They could have been no older than five months, but when they opened their eyes and reached up for him, John realized he no longer wanted to be the go-to man of magic.
He wanted to be their father.
To discourage people from calling him away from his children, John created his persona of a man barely honorable enough to join a team. Over the five years of his raising his kids, his reputation plummeted until only Batman called to him unless absolutely necessary.
It was a breath of fresh air. John had fought for too long and too hard. He was retired now, just like his band days, the days when John would speed off to save the world were behind him. He only stepped in if a friend asked for a favor.
He had other priorities now.
The best part? The Justice League would never know that.
"Dad!" Dani screamed into his ear, making him grimace.
"Inside voice, darling."
"Sorry." She twirls her fingers, a nervous habit she picked up from John, before brightening up "I'm just super excited. Orichad said Mr. Bruce Wayne will be at the gym! Do you think he'll sign my Wayne Space shirt?"
Ah, yes, the man who was funding some space program or another. He only knew about this because his twins adored anything to do with space travel, as if though he couldn't just teleport them to a different planet.
"I'm sure he will, darling."
"win a MMORPG" is from when my brother was showing me the Sword Art Online Abridged series. Apparently, everyone is trapped in the video game until someone 'wins' and the crowd of players were like "??? My evil dude, do you even know what this game IS??? There is no winning."
I loved your tags, btw. And yes, I imagine Dick would make a point to check in with Tim about him and his friends, and maybe put out some feelers to the adults in the other kids' lives to check in.
I think Tim and Dick would both want to keep a familial relationship with each other and they'd both be the type to put in the effort. It wouldn't be the same relationship, but that's the thing! That's normal! Sibling relationships change as people grow up and no longer live so closely together. Like everything else in life, it takes work.
I wonder how much of the Young Justice run files would Dick have had access to at the time they were occurring? Does he know about Gun Batman, Santa's death, and that time Empress killed Jason Todd, or did Tim just file that paperwork and never bring it up? Maybe Young Justice in general is a sore point between Tim and Dick because it was YJ's inexperience that got Donna killed.
I fully believe in the Suicide Pact tho. If one of them can't be talked down, or brought back to sanity, or contained from becoming their worst nightmares, the other three will take them out and it will destroy them all to do it. "If your last act is for us to have your blood on our hands, then your hands will be just as bloody. We go together, bitches. Mutual assured destruction."
I don't remember whether canon revealed Tim's specific Hit List contingencies or not, I lost that comic book awhile ago.
So I'd like to make shit up and invite people to add to the list. I've said before that I like to imagine that Damian just found the Hit List file and saw himself and immediately went to Nightwing, and I think it'd be funny if the Hit List was actually either A) Tim's customized playlists for everyone or B) the stupidest plans that might work as a mockery of Batman's contingency list.
In this episode I want to focus on option B, what would be on the Stupid Plans List if someone goes evil.
Damian - erase his Cheese Viking saves. Tell him his sketches of Batman are technically furry art. Buy him Robux???
Dick - lead him to Gotham zoo, get him to the elephants. Strategically leave powdered sedatives on ground, hope he licks? Dress as Jaybin, talk him down as hallucination.
Jason - just cut my own throat this time fuck.
Bruce - call Clark. Call Diana.
Cass - aw shit here we go again
Steph - Join. As a treat.
Cassie, Kon, Bart - all else fails, Core Four Suicide Pact 👍
Ra's - tell him I'll be his heir if he wins an MMORPG of my choice. Maybe he'll forget to Lazarus bathe?
If my isekai self-insert can't be Dick Grayson's twink older brother, Mitchell Grayson, because he's "a Gary Stu" and would become "overpowered", then I want my second choice to be an inky blob of Eldritch knowledge that manifests in Fawcette City once a week to be a guest on WhizKid's Radio/Podcast.
My segment is gossiping about the secrets of heroes and villains, but vaguely or only about really useless information. Or occasionally incredibly specific instructions. Sometimes Billy and I answer questions from Chirper or Readdit.
"Who is the Red Hood?"
"The grandson of Batman's most beloved teacher. It's causing some issues."
"What is Superman's biggest secret?"
"Superman spot-checks the lead levels of infant formula whenever he's near a grocery store."
"Is there anything I need to know right now?"
"There's an unattended lit candle in the dorm room across the hall from yours - the door with the three pink post-it notes and the whiteboard with the purple butterfly sticker. You should call the RA before a badly hung scarf catches aflame in two minutes."
"What is the meaning of life?"
"Why do you want meaning? Isn't being alive enough?"
"Do you have a favorite human?"
"Yes."
"Is it me?"
"Perhaps."
You'd think after so many years of people inside and outside of the force trying to fix things, that the Gotham City PD would be a little less corrupt.
But no, the biggest domestic terrorist in town stays alive because he's also the whitest domestic terrorist in town.
Martha and Jon Kent are trans t4t and that's why they knew how to get new documentation for a space toddler.
During the AIDS crisis it was not uncommon for queer couples to adult adopt each other so they could make medical decisions or be allowed to legally inherit.
If gay marriage gets repealed, this whole country is going to become Alabama.
Be gay, do crime, get those benefits.
Resource hoard, resource hoard!
...I need to make a different Tumblr where I pretend to be a dragon amassing knowledge with gremlin energy.
Precious gems? No. Look at my collection of books about precious gems! This one is about how they're made! This one is about their meaning in different cultures! This one is about how to use them in science! This one is about fictional precious gems! Here's a history of jewelry styles! Here's how they affected trade! Let's sit together and read each other our favorite parts!
The Special Interest Dragon doesn't get invited to many parties, but he is sure popular when essays need to be sourced.
some fucking resources for all ur writing fuckin needs
* body language masterlist
* a translator that doesn’t eat ass like google translate does
* a reverse dictionary for when ur brain freezes
* 550 words to say instead of fuckin said
* 638 character traits for when ur brain freezes again
* some more body language help
(hope this helps some ppl)
Fucking thieves using ai for all the wrong fucking reasons I hope they become a better person someday and are choked with guilt for their shitty actions
How To Lock All of Your Fics At Once On Ao3
Someone has probably already done this but
For anyone looking to lock their works for only registered users over on Ao3 in light of the sudowrites scraping thing here is how you can lock all of your fics at once.
Log into Ao3 and go to your Profile, Works or Dashboard
At the top under you’re user name there are four buttons pick Edit Works
Second row of buttons on the right chose All and then hit Edit
Scroll down past all of your works and then keeps scrolling until you find Visibility change it to Only Show to Registered User
(If a fic is over the tag limit you have to edit those down to make edit to the work.)
Hit Update All Works at the very bottom and you are done all of you fics should now have a little blue lock next to your user name on each fic.
So, it's been some time since I read that Justice League arc that has The Batman Who Laughs. Can anyone tell me how canon that dude's existence is nowadays? Because I'm pretty sure that due to time travel, he's the specific reason Superman stopped Batman from killing the Joker after Jason's death.
And did anyone remember what happened to the Rabid Robins? Was one of them confirmed to be an alternate Tim or was that fan speculation? Did they all die or get sent back to their shitty world without being helped or what? I know that his version of Damian got Joker Jr'ed, but I don't remember what happened to him, either.
And the big ask. Is Joker's living body still boobytrapped to release enough Joker Venom to Jokerize whoever is near him when he dies? Because I thought that that was why Batman revived Joker when Nightwing killed him - not just because the act would have wrecked Dick at that point in time but because otherwise Batman, Nightwing, and Robin all would have been in danger.
Like I said, it's been awhile since I read the comic, I might be misremembering things.
My problem is that I have the heart of a Robin with the body of a Penguin.
The world isn't ready for another Danny Devito I gotta try to make things better for my next round
Yesssss new resource. New things to learn. Add this to the knowledge hoard.
AWESOME SEX-ED
Ok it has just occurred to me that probably not everyone knows about my favorite sex-ed resource, Scarleteen! They have loads of great articles with information about sex, birth control, etc. They also have ways for you to ask questions that you want answered!
They have articles on everything from having sex as a disabled person, a fat person, and/or an intersex person to how to get FREE birth control as a minor(!!!) asexuality 101 and so much more!!
This is an awesome resource and my go-to when I want to know something about sex, I highly recommend it for anyone with questions/curiosities about sex, and while it's largely teen focused, there will be something here that's helpful for just about anyone!
When I started writing this post I was just going to include a couple articles... but I found so many I like so here are a bunch that may be helpful under the cut (Disclaimer: I have not read all of them because there are so many, nor am I in every group of people they're about, for example I'm not intersex or disabled, so I can't speak to the accuracy of all of them, but I've generally found Scarleteen to be pretty reliable.)
The articles I've included are mostly less typical stuff and things I think are super important but not talked about enough, if you're looking for more basic sex-ed just going to their website will get you started.
Tagging a couple accounts on here who do sex-ed stuff incase they want to reblog (No pressure though <3) @certifiedsexed @batmanisagatewaydrug
ALSO APPARENTLY SCARLETEEN IS ON TUMBLR??? @hellyeahscarleteen amazing.
Anatomy
Quickies: Sexual Anatomy | Scarleteen
With Pleasure: A View of Whole Sexual Anatomy for Every Body | Scarleteen
Intersex stuff
(Inter)sex and Relationships | Scarleteen (A series of articles by an intersex person)
Supporting Your Intersex Child Through Puberty | Scarleteen
Trans stuff
Supports for Trans Youth and Their Families (and a few words for everybody else) | Scarleteen
It's a Trap: How to Spot Anti-Trans Resources | Scarleteen
Self-Care Amidst a Deluge of Anti-Trans Legislation | Scarleteen
Transmasculine Flow: Let's Talk Periods | Scarleteen
Welcome to Trans Summer School! | Scarleteen (At the top there's a drop down that says "This piece is part of Trans Summer School" which shows you all of the articles)
The Lowdown on Low-Dose Testosterone | Scarleteen
Finding Our Own Voices: Renée Yoxon and Gender-Affirming Vocal Therapy | Scarleteen
Some Books and Balms for Nonbinary Folks | Scarleteen
Fatness
Fat Bodies: Learning to Care for Your Rolls and Folds | Scarleteen
The Confidence of Fat Sexuality: An interview with sex educator Elle Chase | Scarleteen
Disability stuff
Disabled Sex: Sex for Two (or More) | Scarleteen
Wheelchair, Bound? Kink and Disability | Scarleteen
Consent Is Sexy: Sexual Autonomy and Disability | Scarleteen
We Need to Talk About Sex and ADHD | Scarleteen
Body Talk: Listening To and Learning From Your Chronic Pain | Scarleteen
A Disabled Persons Guide to Talking with Your Partner(s) About Sex | Scarleteen
Sex and Parent Caregivers | Scarleteen
Disabled Sex Yes! | Scarleteen
I really want to have sex, but I don't know how, and I'm queer, chronically ill and isolated. | Scarleteen
Birth control
Getting Birth Control May Be Easier Than You Think! | Scarleteen (Aka how to get FREE BIRTH CONTROL as a MINOR. Not just for the USA but also Australia, Canada, India, New Zealand, South Africa, and the UK)
How to Manage Pain with IUD Insertions | Scarleteen (Not even just about pain, super in-depth helpful guide)
Other
F*c&!ng First Aid: A Quick Guide to Common Sex Injuries | Scarleteen
From OW! to WOW! Demystifying Painful Intercourse | Scarleteen
Sex after rape. Where do I begin? | Scarleteen
Becoming Out: a totally non-exhaustive, step by step guide to coming out | Scarleteen
Your PMDD Primer: A Necessary Guide to an Under Researched Disorder | Scarleteen
Crisis Pregnancy Centers: Harm, Not Help | Scarleteen
Just the Basics, Ace: An Asexuality Primer | Scarleteen
Love that character growth~
And! Also! The maturity of recognizing that whether or not you are personally interested in a thing does not make it anymore valid or invalid to anyone else.
I probably most definitely didn't word that right.
Friends don't need to share 100% the same interests and opinions to be friends. That follows with every relationship in life and it's just such a good way to learn new things about the world and yourself.
Though Tim does have a point: do not fall so far into obsession that you try to assassinate the president to impress the actress you've been stalking and instead murder a press secretary.
Tim Drake: "#1 Conspiracy Theorist Hater"
(Robin 1993)
Also Tim Drake: Marries Dates a conspiracy theorist.
(Tim Drake: Robin, #1)
I would like to announce that my little brother is a little bitch (nongendered) and I love him dearly.
I was texting him about a recent tragic realization about strawberries. And this little fucker who stole my height and testosterone from before the womb goes:
Little Bro: so that's bananas, pecans, milk, and strawberries
LB: all hurt your mouth
LB: gonna need to Kevorkian you with a banana split in a few years at this rate
Anyway I called him a cunt and I feel justified in that action. We love each other very much.
And that's very much how I see current Tim and Damien's relationship with each other. It's fun to playfully hate on a sibling who can bite back. It's flyting, but without the poetry.
No, don't tell me that. It's just a little spicy, like eating too much pineapple. It's totally fine.
I've already had to realize this about bananas, I'm not ready to lose strawberries too
Strowburry melk
Strawberry milk is so good frfr is better than actual strawberries because it doesn't make your mouth spicy afterwards
Strowburry melk
StephCass is canon the way the People have responded to official UNO rules
I read a post earlier and then lost it before I could reblog it with some interesting information so I'm gonna throw the information out into the void.
The original post was a comment about how no one who has ever inked a comic has ever met a person of color before. They had very valid complaints about bad shading and inconsistent skin tones.
And y'all know me. I am a fiend for comic industry history.
Color in comics is obviously a huge deal, not just in skin but for iconic costume designs. The oldest and most well-known characters tend to be bright shades of red, blue, green and/or black. This is true across the board in early comics and it's due to a variety of factors. The biggest one being that most comics, to be made cheaply, could only use around 63 colors for a standard issue. On top of that, the way the DC and Marvel printed their comics was basically with pointillism and shifting densities.
Before I wind up regurgitating the whole article, let me link one of my go-to resources.
And
Actually, womenwriteaboutcomics.com in general is a fantastic educational tool and a great way to keep an eye out for opportunities to submit your own comic story submissions.
Thanks for letting me nerd out about comic history again!
I say he should call himself the Coot, just to be extra fucking petty about how many times he's had to deal with mind games and intellectual-type villains.
Also, they are occasional nest parasite water birds with red eyes and black heads who are known to starve their weaker cooties of they don't kill them outright. And they look like ducks but they aren't ducks.
Hmmm hero with a habit of late nights, with a cowl and black hair who lives(d) on a houseboat. One who is known for looking like someone he's not or having imposter syndrome in general.
I'm just sayin'!
"Tim's next hero name should be (insert basic ahh bird name)!"
Incorrect, I believe it should either be a reference to a detective novel or some really weird/ less heard of/ complicated bird name.
"The Babbler"
"Slaty Thrush"
"Night Owl" would actually be cool, ngl...
"Sunbird"
"Crake"
"Eagle Owl"
"Red Rumped Swallow"
"American Pipit"
"Azure Dollarbird"
"Blood Pheasant"
"Barking Owl"
I think you get it.
Friendly reminder that in America many people on disability income lose that income if they get married or can't quality for it at all if they are married!
stop getting married between the ages of 18-25 like wtf are you thinking…?
Hey! Hey you!
Yes, you! The person who thinks too much about comic book characters and deep dives into esoteric subjects in order to create a free work of art?
How's your typing speed? How quickly could you learn a new way to type? Do you like knowing things, often terrible things, that other people don't? Can you bear the weight of both banality and daily tragedy? Does the idea of a stressful job make you bare your teeth in a feral grin, welcoming the challenge?
Do you get fed up with the American court systems? Does the frustration of injustice and the feeling of helplessness choke you out at night?
Now is a fantastic time to look into the field of a Stenographer, or a Court Reporter.
Every court case must be legally and accurately documented and frankly there aren't enough stenographers to go around. Especially since a great number of them will be moving into retirement age in the coming years.
It's a no-breaker that the government is on fire, but we can't just shut it down until a roiling mass of different peoples somehow agree on a better way to get shit done. There are people in the now who need to have their cases heard sooner rather than later and Court Reporters are essential to that happening.
***I'm not claiming that this is or has ever been my job, either! There's like one person on this site who has confirmation of at most which state I lived in years ago and that's because we're personal email-level friends. Please be careful about what info you share on the Internet.
***That being said, I've held some fairly atypical jobs over the years and so have many friends of mine. They can be honestly fun to talk about and it's always fun to make someone realize that yes, that thing would have to be a job, that's an actual job thing to do. And I like to talk up my friends' wild experiences as well!
I love the StephCass ship, I just also want to give Cass more choices and chances to slut it up.
Cass's character is a wonderful mess of body autonomy issues, brainwashing, trauma, and stereotypes about disabilities. The fandom paints her as being a pure and innocent creature of mental fortitude and emotional perfection and that's fun to meme on, but in reality?
In reality, get her some hoes. Let her explore herself, let her date around, let her reclaim herself sexually, let her get really toxic with that one ex who shoots up a car when she dumps them.
Have you ever met someone who grew up in an extremely regimented household? You know the type, the ones where the parents need to know where kids are at all the time and who they're with and what they're doing? Home by 8 every evening, no cussing allowed, healthy snacks only, no controversial conversational topics allowed, no films or shows or books or music that hasn't been approved by the parents?
Remember what happens to those kids the moment they start living on their own?
Give Cass that crashout. Please. It makes sense for her character to go unhinged in her civilian life. And not in the comic book sense of Tim's bad year, but in a general "I had a one night stand and found out I also slept with both his sisters earlier this week" kind of disaster.
Do you think Bruce Wayne became written as a worse and worse parent because the idea of what makes a person "Heroic" has changed over the years?
(Cut for rambling)
At the start of Batman comics there was a very clear need for the audience to suspend their disbelief. The comic was very much a story, a reflection of the world where the reader was to be entertained with tales about a strange detective investigating the strange crimes of Gotham City.
Robin was Batman's partner, a new element to the story that appealed to a younger audience. They were a team that brought in a lot of capital. Authors would write heart-rending storylines and at the opposite page there would be a weird cheerful ad for Batman and Robin using fruit pies to stop crime.
Society evolves quickly and our media can struggle to keep up. The notion that children should be protected is a relatively recent one and it makes the inclusion of child heroes become... unpalatable to people. Modern values have changed and so too must the characters.
But applying current social values to the concept of child heroes would erase them.
Their whole existence is to be young and to fight the people who want to hurt them. To be young and be able to protect one's loved ones is a compelling story.
It's not just comic book heroes who fall under this paradox, either. Avatar: The Last Airbender is full of children learning how to fight and die for their world. Percy Jackson is another. Hell, one could even make a case for Warrior Cats. The Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew were facing off with murderers just as often as any kid hero.
It's a common and loved story because we've all been children who have had to carve out a place for ourselves in the world.
So the existence of Robin, of child heroes in general, becomes an awkward duality. The character is too profitable to retire. Many people can still suspend disbelief enough to enjoy the story. Other people struggle to accept that a "hero", a "good Dad", could allow his children to fight at his side.
So authors are tasked again and again to try to explain Robin. To excuse the existence of a child hero in a day and age when most responsible adults would freak the fuck out at the idea of a kid going out at night to fight criminals.
And sometimes, more often than many of us would like, they come up with writing Bruce as a bad parent. A bad leader, even. It doesn't help that writers don't often get to have stories published that have significant influence on Batman as a character. He's purposely, perpetually trapped at one starting position for every new story.
Which is a valid take. In my opinion it's uninspired, but I understand the rationale behind it. They're working against a lot of baggage. There's nearly 90 years of culture shift to account for and hundreds of authors. Even the way comics are written now is very different from back then and that also messes with perceptions.
To me, Bruce is a deeply flawed man. He's been a shitty dad, yes, but not because Robin exists. He didn't have a choice with Robin - that was decided by forces beyond his control. I don't know how to judge canon Bruce Wayne; there are genuinely too many stories for me to feel like I have an accurate read on him.
I know that he tries very hard to do good. I know that he has the potential to make better choices and take kinder actions.
I'm not going to hold my breath, though. Even if we get a canon Batman run where he gets therapy and apologizes for his mistakes and past actions, where he has some real, meaningful dialogue with the people he loves... The next writer can ignore that for a more dramatic plot where he acts like a complete drip.
Pick your preferred version and warp canon to fit that guy - it's what DC does.
Thank the goddess for fanfiction.
Free Comic Book Day is coming up, bro! May 3 is the best time to get a stash of the real goods or PDFs on sale!
Pirating is wallet-friendly, but discourages creators. I encourage at minimum the middle route where people can pre-read their comics and then buy them later when they can.
I be like: I wonder why these pages are taking so long to load :/
My thirteen opened tabs:
Hey, heeeey. This fic is so freaking good. I love me some cryptid Batfam and this one is like.
*insert hand flapping*
It's like that? Like, it's such an excellent look at humanity and masking and people being different aspects of themselves throughout their lives, but it's all hidden in the subtext of a story about spirits and I love that even more?!
I love that sometimes we see humanity best when we strip away what we usually define as human.
Fucking. Love this. I'll write a comment on it in a bit, gotta hit that therapy appointment but I loved this so much I wanted to share aaaaah
Lemme share a story with you.
I got my first laptop as part of my school-provided college gear back in the day and back then the only places for fanfiction were either niche circles where each author had their own website that hosted their works and a small selection of other authors who were their friends all connected by hyperlink... Or fanfiction.net.
It was wild times on the Internet, my friend. It was very difficult to keep track of stories.
But! I visited home after some time and mentioned to my little brother that my computer was running slow. He, being the more tech-minded of us, volunteered to check it out, so I opened it up and brought up a new tab for him to look stuff up if needed.
It was not needed.
"Deadname." My brother was taking very calming breaths. "I know having multiple tabs open is convenient... But you should not have so many that they look like a Mario SPIKE PIT!"
Zero lessons have been learned since then, but it was very funny to watch his face changing colors.
I be like: I wonder why these pages are taking so long to load :/
My thirteen opened tabs:
For the authors and the curious
LISTEN UP MOTHER FUCKERS
SEE THIS WEBSITE?
ITS CALLED WOLFRAM ALPHA
THIS IS THE BEST GODDAMN WEBSITE FOR ACADEMIC SHIT. FUCK GOOGLE.
THIS MOTHERFUCKER WILL LET YOU SEARCH “HOSPITAL BEDS IN CHAD VS. IRAN”
AND IT GIVES YOU A STRAIGHT GODDAMN ANSWER
MAYBE YOU’RE NOT INTERESTED IN DOCTORNESS OF THIRD WORLD COUNTRIES COOL SHIT
HAVING TROUBLE WITH MATH?
HOLY SHIT
OR MAYBE YOU WANNA DICK AROUND
WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT
Damn, I'm gonna hafta stop joking that Batman's a furry because after some thought, that's a disrespectful joke. Batman is clearly not a fursona and I should know better than to kink shame like that anyway.