My Life Is Over

I’m so excited to finally fucking do it I am so excited about it I think it may be the only thing making me happy anymore. Knowing I don’t have to deal with this shit anymore. I don’t have to be perfect or fake for anybody or those stupid fucking cunt “friends” of mine I can finally just leave without a trace and move on. Everyone else can move on. I will be forgotten about and my online presence will disappear and dissipate and I just can’t fucking wait. What was once a stain will finally be thoroughly cleansed and taken care of. I will not be a mistake to humanity anymore. I will finally be able to forgive myself

I’m an embarrassment to fucking everyone

I hate talking about it. I hate hearing people talk to me. I hate being known. I hate being “out there”. I hate everyone who says they prioritize me then they lie to me. I just wish that I was stable. I wish things were right. I’m so fucking unhappy and I thought I was doing better but I’m just not.

I feel so weird talking to anyone right now. I don’t like it and I don’t want to talk to anybody I want to be left alone forever. I just wish I was dead. It feels like the good times truly could never make up for the misery the rest of my life has to give me. I fucking hate everything. I hate thinking about what comes after. I hate thinking about the death process. I hate it all. I just want it over. I want to escape and just never be known and be alone forever.

I don’t want anyone to have anything to do with me. I feel so depressed and I try not to let these emotions get to me but Jesus Christ it’s so hard not to. My friends all discard me and I get talked over and it’s so tiring.

I just wish I was loved. I wish that I knew I was loved and cared about and praised and adored and whatever the fuck. I wish I didn’t need anyone else’s approval. I’m so fucking over it.

the fact that my mom is disappointed that I can just never seem to be happy despite everything is honestly something that makes me feel even worse about myself. It is gut wrenching being around her already, but having to part ways will be one of the last hardest things I’ll ever put myself through

BPD is just so excruciating to deal with. I’m so tired. I’m tired of letting this illness control me, but I don’t know how to get rid of it. I’m just so comfortable in this misery. I hate it but I truly can’t ever escape it so why even try? I’m so sad. I hate having this. I just hate it

Everyone I love and have broken up with or left are all the fucking same they always will be they will always think I’m gross or repulsive or ugly or just fucking wish that I had a fucking dick they will always cross my boundaries and prefer looking at other things besides me And think I’m fucking ugly I keep getting betrayed over and over and over and over I will never ever truly be loved for who I am I fucking hate everyone

I know I don’t know you, and you don’t know me and are probably just scrolling through the tags, but if you need someone I am here. I might not get to it right then, but I also come in here a lot.

Basically, don’t be afraid to reach out. We’re all in this together. Even if we don’t know each other, I’m happy to hear you vent and even offer advice if you wanted, but if you don’t that’s okay.

Just know things will get better.

Everything is temporary.

You are loved and appreciated and deserve nothing but a great life.

I can’t do this anymore I can’t fucking do it anymore

I just want you back I know I can’t have it and in reality I know it would be terrible to have you back. In reality I don’t even fucking want you back. But im spiraling and im so lost without you. I dont know what to do. I feel I still love you. I dont know what to fucking do. I just dont want to live anymore. I just want to fucking die. I hate you but god I would do anything for you in my life again. I just wish we could reverse time. I wish this didn’t happen. I wish j wasn’t alive

I need friends I need help I just need somebody I am drowning

I am going to kill myself