I'm Fat Why Am I Still Fat

I got a new book to reeeaaad

I don't read a lot (I used to inhale books as a kid and I have my fanfiction phases, but I just don't have tiiiimeee and when school is stressful the last thing I want to do is read even more 🥲)

But I'm supper excited for this one

This Moment when I've borrowed my friend money the other day and I ask her about it - it's not even that I care about the money on itself that much, just wanted to remind her - and she just says that she doesn't have cash and offers to buy me something in the cafeteria instead - despite always being the first to make jokes about how I never eat

It's not that big of a deal, but it did kinda bug me, because the way she said it made it sound like she knew exactly what she was doing and stuff

Because she's always trying to pressure me into eating, which I appreciate, but then it also gets annoying

wearing my hair open makes my face look slim but shearing it in a ponytail makes me look morr masculine.... Decisions, decisions, all of them wrong

Meanspo?

Don't need that, my siblings made me in the Sims, realistically 😃🔫

Bruh my sister keeps pressuring her boyfriend into eating I'd literally break up with her

I love sugar free monster energy. Have I told you yet how much I love sugar free monster energy?

Yes? I don't care I haven't told you yet that I absolutely love sugar free monster energy.

I don't think I've mentioned how much I love sugar free monster energy.

Can you tell I love sugar free monster energy? No? You know what else I love? YES, it's sugar free monster energy.

(What a cringe fucking post omg)

Theres this one special website which tells your weight in x days if you eat a certain amount of calories... What's it called??

The next few days are going to be incredibly busy for me, but that's awesome because I'll literally won't have time to eat :D

I'm not going to try and fast though, because I will need the energy

It started today with me having to stay at school until 6pm (🥲) because of choir practice, tomorrow I'll have to leave almost right after school to play at a concert (I know I'll barely have time to change and maybe practice the pieces one last time)

And on Saturday I'll have singing stuff from 8am to 4pm

Both crying and laughing right now because I know I'll be DRAINED when all this is over, but I won't be around my parents to watch me eat, I won't be at home with all the binge food and I'll probably be to busy to even think about eating anything, hopefully

As I mentioned though, I will be having dinner, because it's the only time I'll be around my parents and I will really need that energy

I may seem cool, but I guarantee you I get no bitches

was at my friend's birthday party and I fucked up SO BADLY. I promised myself to only eat one slice of cake and a to y portion of dinner today, but then came the evening snacks and all the stupid food and in my head I was constantly like, "I need to stop" but I fucking couldn't and now I feel like the worst person on earth. I woke up to the regret and we're about to eat breakfast, and here's the thing: I never eat around them usually and they keep pestering me with those "What have you eaten today? It's unhealthy" and stuff, and now I completely ruined that. So I planned not to eat breakfast at all, but if I don't eat that now after that fucking horrible binge yesterday... I'm just going to try to go to the bathroom in between and then get away with eating some fruit.

I fucking hate myself.