The Signs At A Fun Fair

i foun d my old wallet in the drawer next to my bed and it had $400 in it im having a heart attack

The signs as inspirational life mottos

aries: fuck the fucking fuckers before the fucking fuckers fuck you.

taurus: I just don't want to look back and think "I could have eaten that".

gemini: don't do meth, do math. it'll fuck you up twice as much.

cancer: never put off til tomorrow what you can straight up cancel.

leo: don't let anyone with bad eyebrows tell you shit about life.

virgo: why say something in 10 words when you can say it in 1000.

libra: everything happens for a reason. but sometimes the reason is that you're stupid and make bad decisions.

scorpio: why wrestle your demons when you can use them to kill your enemies.

sagittarius: if no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it then how bad of a decision can it really be.

capricorn: sarcasm, because beating the shit out of people is illegal.

aquarius: maturity is like a light switch. you only turn it on when needed.

pisces: today i will live in the moment unless it's unpleasant in which case i will eat a cookie.

the signs working in starbucks

aries: I love my job I get to see so many new people and it's just terrific man you know *accidentally drops drink* gODDAMN F#€@%+€&!!!

taurus: hey guys you ok? looks like you need some extra help? lmao sorry I'm done for the day SMELL YA LATER

gemini: hey sweet cheeks wanna buy me a drink after work I get off at 4 ;) ;) ;)

cancer: hi!! how are you?? that's good!! haha oh right what do you want to order?

leo: adding a shot of caffeine in there you really look like you need it know what I mean lmao

virgo: AIGHT WE GOT FOUTRY THREE SECONDS TO MAKE A VENTI VANILLA LATTE LETS GO TEAM

libra: hey hey hey you want a what? a latte? well imma put an extra shot of syrup because you're SWEET HAHA GET IT

scorpio: can we please serve these people asap so I can go home I'm watching avengers tonight

sagittarius: *the one guy who makes really intense eye contact with all the customers*

capricorn: whoa I really like your shirt!! is that *band*?? omg I LOVE them we should hang out some time hmu man hmu

aquarius: yo the stars say you should get a venti cappuccino today

instead of a small u feel

pisces: uhhhhh wait sorry can you repeat the order please?

The Signs as Students

Aries: That one kid who always breaks the rules but still has many friends that respects them. Would often say their opinions or the opinions of others for them and is somewhat athletic. Doesn’t like going to school.

Taurus: Is the laid-back and quiet student at the back that doesn’t really care but does well at school. Looks very nice and is patient and would prefer not having the spotlight. Doesn’t like going to school.

Gemini: A social butterfly, is very popular but talkative. They usually get accused that they’re the one making noise and passing notes. Has average scores and gossips about the other signs. Doesn’t like going to school.

Cancer: The shy kid that has good grades but avoids volunteering and doesn’t like attention. Has a small group of friends and doesn’t like getting in trouble. Is very nurturing and caring in a way. Doesn’t like going to school.

Leo: The popular kid that always likes attention and has a big group of friends. Very social and aims to be the the teachers pet. Usually likes performing in front of many people and usually shows off. Doesn’t like going to school.

Virgo: That kid that’s a perfectionist and studies a lot for the tests. Quiet and doesn’t do anything much that would cause a lot of effort. Barely gets in trouble and lets their friend copy their homework. Doesn’t like going to school.

Libra: The flirtatious type that is outgoing and loves going to parties and events. Doesn’t like having anyone hate them and wants to please everyone. Sometimes gets in trouble but a good friend, doesn’t like going to school.

Scorpio: That one kid that breaks the rules but still is one of the top students in class. Is mysterious and sassy in a way but is a good and protective friend, doesn’t really like school.

Sagittarius: Is usually absent but maintains grades and has a small group of friends. Is liked by some teachers and open-minded, doesn’t like going to school.

Capricorn: That weird kid that is usually misunderstood. Does well in school but avoids the spotlight. The teacher’s pet and has a small group of friends usually and is dependable. Is secretly depressed and doesn’t like going to school.

Aquarius: Is a rebel and doesn’t like being told what to do. Basically doesn’t want to be there and wants to get the heck out of there. Has a group of friends and somehow maintains their friendship. Doesn’t like going to school.

Pisces: At the back usually seen sleeping during class hours. Is usually the peacemaker but then suddenly causes massive shit because of how corrupted the government and school is. Doesn’t like going to school.

Summary: Everyone doesn’t like going to school

please help me escape arranged marriage

my name is naima and i’m an eighteen y/o somali lesbian in desperate need of help. over the past few months i have been under the impression that my family is warming up to the idea of me not being what they want me to be. unfortunately this is not the case and i believe the only way out is to escape as they have now resorted to basically treating me like a prisoner and promising me to a man instead of letting me go to university as they promised. i have no funds of my own and to even think of escaping and surviving the first few weeks i desperately need money. i have to use ko-fi since it’s the most anonymous of ways and my father has found out what i do online before (i had to remake my tumblr). despite everything i do not wish any harm on them. i simply want to part ways. i don’t have a lot of followers but if any of you is willing to help i will forever carry you in my heart.

ko-fi.com/princessnaima

Rationalism vs. Romanticism vs. Realism

Rationalism: “Actions should be based upon reason.” - Virgo, Capricorn, Aquarius, Aries

Romanticism: “See the world as you would like it to be.” - Cancer, Leo, Gemini, Pisces

Realism: “It is what it is.” - Taurus, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius

Sign the fucking petition

I don’t care if it isn’t something you usually do, or doesn’t fit your blog theme, or you don’t want emails after (that you can literally turn off), or you “don’t do politics”

Sign this fucking petition about the eu copyright laws (we literally have one day left)

If you’re actually a decent human being, sign the fucking petition

nothing is more satisfying than someone walking right past ur hiding spot in hide and seek

what the signs would do if their loved one was hurt/threatened

aries: full mother bird mode. someone is going to get cut, stabbed, or possibly hospitalized. mauled just enough for them to learn a lesson. taurus: they get in a debate and argue back and forth with whoever is placing the person they care about in harm’s way. they’re great in arguments thanks to their resilience, so the person ends up giving up. gemini: they’d back them up like any tru homie 10/10. nothing too extreme because they don’t want anyone getting hurt, but it’s not cool to mess w people. cancer: you wouldn’t expect it from cancer, but they go on full on, almost as dangerous as aries when upset. not only will they get physical if necessary, they also know a lot of cards they could pull to make you look like a terrible person. bye-bye social status. leo: DO NOT MESS WITH THEIR FRIENDS. probably one of the deadliest people to mess with alongside aries and scorpio. they’ll destroy from the inside out or the outside in–any way they can, they’ll make it happen. virgo: they care for their friends, but the last thing they want is trouble. they’ll try to find a way to negotiate things out, and will probably succeed. libra: they know everyone and have ties everywhere. there’s no one to run when libra is around. libra knows all. libra sees all. libra hears all. scorpio: lmao grave should be dug and headstone rightfully purchased and carved into bc dead for sure sagittarius: they’ll try not to upset even the person harming their friend. they’ll just protect, protect, protect. maybe that will require some contact with the person, or even physical violence. whatever needs to happen, will. capricorn: they’ll snake their way into destroying the person socially. they’re not social butterflies, but they’re good with words and spreading their words around like wildfire. their friends are carefully selected and must be handled with great care because of that. aquarius: their friend will be protected in the end, but the “villain” will still leave with their limbs intact. their dignity, not so much. aquarius will probably mess with them playfully, but it will do the trick. pisces: they don’t want to pick sides. don’t make them. this is too stressful. their friend is their friend and they want to protect them, but the bully is big and scary and what if they come after them next?! this is too much. too dangerous. they’re just one person. they can’t take the pressure.

Diamoric Terms (a better worded post, finally)

Hello! About several months back, I posted two seperate posts about Diamoric specific community terms. They weren’t exactly the best worded, so here’s a brand new post for people!

Sapphic communities have butch and fem, (with tomcat and doe being seen used by bi and pan ladies,) Achillean communities have bear and twink (and about a hundred other lovely terms,) so in the spirit of things, I coined peacock, crow, and kiwi.

But Hatch, what do those mean?

The Avian Spectrum, as we can call it, isn’t about body type or masc/fem presentation, its about style presentation. A peacock diamoric would be flashy (bright makeup and haircolors, colorful clothes, or anything flamboyant) and a kiwi diamoric would seem like a librarian (neutral earthy tones, simple and nice clothes, simple.) Crow is in the middle of that, and if you’re really wanting some in-the-middle terms, pigeon is between peacock and crow, and falcon is between crow and kiwi!

Examples:

Peacock!

X | X | X

Crow!

X | X | X

Kiwi!

X | X | X