It'd Also Be Funny If She Did Own His Soul But Was Like "Just Do What You Like" And Then They Became

Exactly: You called?

When you turn 18, you go to the Chapel to summon a Familiar, then your future is decided based on its shape. All you can do is name the creature and then the summoning does the rest. After you name it, the priestesses all stare at you with horror in their eyes, then scream when it appears.

". . . Toche. Sorry for the mix up! Uhhhh, you want this free fro-yo coupon I got as a sorry?" "Yes. Yes I do"

"Halt, villain," said the heroine, pointing her sword at the man. "Hold on, I’m no villain," said the man. "Your eyes are pitch black—those aren’t natural," said the heroine. "And yours are bright gold—those aren’t exactly natural either," said the man.

What color flowers would you like at your memorial service???

birthay

Me: If I join the hunt can I 1. Adopt as many kids as I want? and 2. shoot Zeus in the balls whenever he tries to make a move on me or the other girls Artemis: Yes. Me: *calling my mom* Hey mom! I'm not going to ever get married but I will adopt a bunch of kids!

Saying you dedicate your hunts to the Goddess Artemis started as a weird private joke to yourself. You never thought it would result in the actual goddess visiting you and asking to teach her how to hunt with a rifle.

I don't get it. I'm that dumb.

Kinda fuckin scary but what the hell

I'm half Mexican, and for me, that food is tacos. Now since I'm also half-white, and a semi-picky eater, I only like chicken or steak tacos mostly.

What’s a stereotypical food from ur culture that u absolutely love.

Hey Chrome, let's do this

all i want is mutuals that reblog my posts and talk to me and call me by my first name

Rebloging because people like that make me want to give them a slow painful death with my own hands. I also hate how cute the colors look because gross people shouldn't have those cute colors

I am making so many “hey mutuals!” posts but this one is serious and it applies to everyone who sees this post actually. PLEASE REBLOG.

I just had to block someone with this flag as their pfp -

For those who don’t know, this is the MAP pride flag. This flag represents pedophiles.

Please reblog so people know that they are not welcome anywhere. Mutuals I BETTER see y’all reblogging this

TBH same. I'd bawl my eyes out and even manipulate them afterwards. Or I'd kick them out of my house since it's legally mine.

Me talking sh*t about ML characters part 2

Also, if I was in her situation I would have had at least five anxiety attacks just in one day. Like c’mon are you really telling me that a 18yo orphan girl with a long life to live, which probably has plans for the future, goes to the mansion her parents left her and IN THE FIRST DAY she dies and now she’s fucking forced to be attached to someone that she doesn’t even know AND THE CRAZIEST THING SHE DOES IS TRY TO SCAPE????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

IF I WAS HER I WOULD GO FUCKING WILD ON ALL THE VAMPIRES and I would cry rlly hard cuz I wouldn’t be able to do anything, the life I had planned, the things I wanted to do… IT’S ALL GONE CUZ SOME STUPID VAMPIRES STOLE MY FUCKING HOUSEADBUWEDFBEJHWKBD

". . . YOU'RE WELCOME!" *runs to the right church*

You rush into a church to stop the love of your life from marrying the wrong person. Not paying attention you barge in yelling "I OBJECT" only to realize it's a funeral. The deceased immediately rises in perfect health. All eyes turn to you.