Some Memes Picked Freshly Off The Lieutenantaceface Vine

BoB parenting headcanons - the kids are sick

BabeRoe

Normally Doc is very calm about all things medical, he knows how to identify and treat illness and it’s just a normal part of life and nothing to freak out over. This goes right out of the window when it’s one of his kids though.

If one of Doc’s kids starts to so much as sniffle, that’s it, bed rest and chicken soup and he’s checking their temperature once an hour and keeping track of any fluctuations or new symptoms.

He knows he’s being ridiculous and that all kids get colds and it’s good to build up their immune system, but he can’t help but wondering what if? What if this is the time when it’s something serious and it slips by him? He knows all the worst case scenarios and he knows that they’re rare, but rare means it happens to some people.

Babe understands Gene’s worry, he really does

but sending the kids to bed whenever they’re even a little unwell leads to bored, cranky children

And Babe doesn’t want to undermine Gene or make his worry worse, but he can’t just sit by and let the kids be miserable

Babe is a great believer that the most important thing for sick kids in a good distraction

So he will teach the kids all the card games that he knows, and tell them all the best stories, and put on the movie he said they couldn’t see until their next birthday as a treat (there’s nothing wrong with the movie, but Babe spend his childhood sneaking about to watch movies that he was too young for and it made him feel grown up and he wants his kids to have the same experience, except without the nightmares he got from stealing an 18 horror movies from his cousins)

And Gene wants to be annoyed at him for getting the kids excited when they should be resting, but also seeing them having fun makes him worry less

Speirton

You know Lip is the parent that ends up catching whatever his kid has because he is taking care of them but not himself.

He tries to deny it but a few days after the kid starts sneezing he is sneezing too.

He tries to push through and hold things together like normal, because he needs to be able to look after the kid, and b/c Ron is a good parent but Lip knows that he does not want to come home from work to a runny-nose, crying little kid, because nobody likes that

But the next day when he wakes up it’s not because of his alarm, and he checks his clock and oh shit it is past 10am and how did he ever sleep in so late

And he leaps out of bed and goes to check on the kid

But the kid isn’t is bed

And he’s lowkey freaking out,  

but then he goes into the living room and Ron and the kid are curled up on the couch watching cartoons. But not regular cartoons, Ron has linked his computer to the tv and is showing the kid all the classic cartoons

And Lip is like, okay well if you’ve got the kid I’m going to go catch up on the cleaning, because dealing with a sick kid means there’s a stack of dishes by the sink and the laundry basket is overflowing

But then he goes to the kitchen and the dishes are done and the washer and the dryer are both running

And he goes back in the lounge and Speirs is like, “Happy? Now come get under the blanket.”

And Lip doesn’t get under the blanket, b/c he’s thinking of what else needs doing, but then Ron says, “I called into work and said I had to take the day because I was taking care of my sick kid and husband, and you don’t want to make me a liar, so you’re going to get on this couch and let me take care of you.”

And so Lip and the kid spend all day napping on the couch while Ron brings them crackers and tea and medicine

And the next day Lip wakes up and for the first time in days his head doesn’t feel stuffy and he can breathe through his nose again, and he can’t help but say that it’s the fastest he’s ever got over being sick.

Ron is smug.

LuzToye

This kid. This kid raised by the two of them is so cheerful and so tough and is no way going to miss the fieldtrip they’ve been looking forward to for months just because they’re just *cough cough* a little bit *sneeze* sick. They’ll wear a sweater! It’s the zoo! There’s no such thing as too sick for the zoo.

And Joe and George look at one another and sigh.

One of them is going to have to be the mean-dad.

“Look, sweetheart,” Joe says, “You can go to the zoo some other time.”

And this kid can tough out sickness, but the thought of missing the trip has their lip wobbling and their eyes are getting all watery

And Joe is shooting George these sideways looks, because their kid about to cry and Joe has been the one to break the bad news and now it’s George’s time to step up b/c crying cannot happen okay it’s just can’t

“Yeah, you can’t go today,” George says, “Because we’re having an party.”

And the kid looks up, still all teary but with a little hopeful smile. “Party?”

“Yep! An ice-cream pyjama party just for the three of us. And a movie marathon. With the sing along DVDs.”

And the kid perks up at that, and says, “I’ll get the blankets,” and runs out. Because family singing and icecream is even cooler than the zoo.“

"Was that really the best thing you can think of?” Joe asks.

George sticks out his tounge. “Next time I’m gonna say disneyland.”

Webgott

So Web is stay at home dad, because writing means he can work from home and set his own hours.

The hours Web & the kid keep are good hours with a long lie in every morning.

(Lieb, who leaves for work at the crack of dawn, wonders how he ended up in a family with such layabouts.)

But this means that Lieb is long gone in his cab by the time Web wakes up and realises that the kid has a fever

And Lieb doesn’t use his phone while driving so Web has no way to contact him.

So it’s just Web and this sick little one, and Web doesn’t know what to do because this has never happened before.

He googles it, but the results just scare and confuse him.

And he’s panicking b/c he knew in his head that this was a thing he would have to deal with when having a kid but he was not prepared for the reality, because his baby is all tired and sad and feverish and he doesn’t know how to fix it.

So he does the only sensible thing.

He calls Lieb’s mom.

Mama Liebgott will know what to do.

When Joe gets home from work the kid is cheerfully practising their reading with Web, with no sign of any problems

Joe sniffs the air

“Is that my mom’s matzo ball soup?” It’s a recipe that has been passed down since Joe’s great-grandma and he’d recognise it anywhere.

And Web looks up from the book and says, “It’s like magic.”

And Joe knows that recipe is the one his mom always used to make him when he was sick, and honestly the scene in the living room is just a little too perfect for him not to be suspicious, but the kid looks fine and Web looks fine, so he’s not worried.

He does call his mom later though.

“You gave Webster the secret family recipe…”

“Of course I did. He gave me my first grandbaby.”

“What? I don’t get any of the credit for my own kid?”

I may or may not have fallen in love with Shane Taylor for like the 5th time this week

[E Company huddled around a table]

Guarnere: Hey! Cap’n Winters, Cap’n Nixon, c’mere for a second!

Luz: We have something for ya!

Nixon & Winters: *jogging over*

Nixon: Whatcha got there?

E Company: *smiling*

Liebgott: *gives them both hand-made Father’s Day cards signed by all of them*

Winters, a mess: Oh...my...God

Nixon: *crying*

Babe: *hands Speirs a card* We made one for you, too, Lieutenant Speirs.

Malarkey: Do you like it?

Speirs, choking up: It’s fine.

must we constantly revive this dead Band of Brothers with “gifs” and “memes” and “fics” for “likes” and “reblogs” how trite

any way 

In this house we love and respect David Kenyon Webster.

webster’s favorite shark is the whale shark i take no criticism

spot the difference challenge 2020

Band Of Brothers Modern AU Headcanons

(No one asked for this, but you know what? I’m still gonna do it.)

The guys all live in the same apartment building.

Dick doesnt understand 99.9% of pop culture. You could probably show him a thirty minute PowerPoint about what “ok boomer” means and he still wouldn’t understand.

Dick listens to old country music and Nix absolutely hates it.

Nix works at the local animal shelter and wants to bring a dog home almost every day, but Dick always tells him that the two dogs they have are enough.

Liebgott listens to Indie music.

He’s also the bass guitarist in a band called The Flashbacks.

The Flashbacks mostly cover songs by The White Stripes, Pixies, Metric, Arctic Monkeys, and occasionally Cavetown, but they do perform a few songs that Liebgott has written, including one dedicated to Webster.

Guarnere plays the drums in The Flashbacks.

Webster writes poetry and everyone claims to hate it. (Spoiler alert: they don’t.)

Webster is Instagram famous. (He mostly posts aesthetic photos he’s taken or little bits of his poetry.)

Luz is a huge fan of all kinds of ghosts, demons, and cryptids, but his favorite would have to be Mothman. He even went to West Virginia to look for him once, but ended up not seeing him.

Luz knows all of the lyrics to Take On Me and Tainted Love and sings them when he gets bored. Sometimes he doesn’t even realize he’s doing it.

Toye has a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and used to go boxing with Guarnere every Saturday before they got in a car crash.

Eugene can sing and play piano. Like... Really well.

Eugene has a banana ball python named Peaches.

Babe used to paint a lot when he was a teenager, so now he’s really good at it. His favorite thing to paint is Eugene’s cat, Magnolia.

Lipton owns a small tea and coffee shop.

Lipton’s shop actually brought him and Ron together. Ron was a regular and always changed up his order to make it more complicated so he could stay longer and talk to Lip.

Ron has a rottweiler puppy named Dally and he carries him around in a puppy backpack. They have matching sunglasses.

Ron is a big Outsiders fan. He’s been to the museum in Tusla five times and read the book at least thirteen times. (And yes, he named his puppy after Dallas Winston.)

Shifty sends everyone a wholesome meme each morning to let them know that they are loved.

Shifty works at Lipton’s tea and coffee shop.

Muck eats tomatoes like apples and everyone’s extremely disgusted by it.

Malarkey, Muck, and Penkala like to hide tiny plastic alligators in front of everyone’s apartments. (They always put sharks in front of Webster’s apartment.)

Luz, Babe, Malarkey, Muck, and Penkala are in a group chat called “RIP Vine 😔😔😔” and each member sends a meme every day. It’s been going on for two years.

Everyone always goes to Buck’s football games, even though most of them don’t care for the sport, because they enjoy screaming at the other team.

Luz, Babe, And Talbert are Tik Tok famous.

winters, showing nixon the eagle's nest wine cellar: nix can have a little vat 69, as a treat

i feel like there is a rule that Speirs cannot be left alone with Penkala and Skinny, because the latter too are marely children and they worship the ground Speirs walks on so it is incredible easy for him to talk them into doing something stupid

like i feel once Alex had to go the hospital because speirs was like “if you hit on something hard constantly, your bones will become stronger and you will suffer minimal injuries” and Alex straight up jumped out of the third floor window to test this

Vogue!Speirs🔥🔥

LMK IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE MORE!! These are really fun to make :)

Webster