As Someone Who Is Rapidly Approaching 30, If I Can Share Just One Price Of Advice I’ve Learned As An

Group projects be like

I asked you to “sign me the fuck up”, not “assign me the fuck-up,”

You’ve heard of Manic Pixie Dream Girl, now introducing:

Non-binary Neurodivergent Nightmare 

I didn’t ask “what?” because I didn’t hear you, my brain still runs on internet explorer and the information hasn’t loaded yet

I become more and more of a conspiracy theorist every time I learn something new about the government

Tiktok is making a whole bunch of claims that you shouldn’t curse the government because they have ‘ancient dark magicks that is so much more powerful then us and did we mention Ancient and Dark and every person talking about this spells it magick’ and something about the cia doing astral projection? and I feel like you’d find this funny caretaker

ACTUALLY THAT'S REAL

IM NOT EVEN JOKING THE CIA TRIED TO TRAIN PEOPLE TO SCRY BACK IN THE 50s BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT THE RUSSIANS WERE DOING IT IT TIES INTO THE MKULTRA STUFF

THEY DONT HAVE SORCERERS ANYMORE SO YOU CAN CURSE THEM

Now this is a beauty pageant I would watch!

Petition to add a “guns and horses and body paint” category to Miss Universe

Miss Guanajuato’s traditional outfit for Miss Mexico 2020 (source)

(Credit to CollegeHumor for making this wonderful trailer)

An Enchanted Map

it shows you a map of an area of your choosing in any amount of detail but every time you use it the DM plays the map song from Dora first. it plays in-game too.

Friend: “How’s that book coming along?”

Me: “Which one?”

Friend: “You already finished one?!”

Me and my seventeen half-finished prologues of various novels and thirty other abandoned books with absolutely no endings: “Well, you see...”

New hot take:

River Song is Miss Frizzle

Prove me wrong, I dare you.

All right mirror me, roll perception

Having problems finding new players?

Just hurl dice at the mirror until your reflection starts pulling its weight and stats up an Elf Ranger.