Its Been So Long (like Less Than A Week) Since Ive Burger Posted So Here We Go: Headcanon List Guys!

just graduated from completely normal girl school little do they know i have headcanons and a name for david and gwens kid

for people who say that jimmy jr isnt good enough for tina, just because they developed tina to be mature and responsible for her age does not mean that jimmy jr is! like he's not great but also, you know, hes 13. i was oblivious at 13 and am still very oblivious now, so i personally feel for him. idk if this makes sense but he is genuinely too young to know what he wants so being like "HE DOESNT DESERVE TINA!" no one deserves a 13 year old boy.

also tina should not get all the credit we give her she is also very petty and competitive and floats between crushes too because she is also 13

guys brilliant au idea but i cant draw so if anyone who can draw sees this feel free to draw smth based off it

its vaguely like the fresh meat au except bob and linda get arrested. hear me out.

the family is still technically a cannibal family but the kids dont know. bob and linda put human meat in the burgers, all their food, they kill and slaughter people, but the kids have no idea this is happening. when tinas 11 (genes 9, louise is 7), bob and linda get arrested for killing people and eating them. the kids are then in and out of orphanages and the streets, and tina has to spend some time in a hospital because of mental illness, but eventually mickey and the other carnies take them in for good. the au takes place two years after the show does (louise is 11, gene is 13, tinas 15 in high school), and the kids are trying to lead normal lives in carniapolis.

individual characters

mickey - their main father figure, the kids live in his trailer, hes still a sort of sketchy guy but has a fairly stable job and loves the kids, a really good guy, not very different from the show but is more worried about the kids now, especially tina because she remembers everything

louise - big goof, kind of a hooligan, wears pajamas pretty much everywhere, still wears her hat, a lot less socialized, curses way too much, has a lot of flashbacks of her parents in her nightmares, sleeps really poorly, a lot more messy, starts play fights a lot more, still close with rudy when she comes back to middle school, clings to tina and misses her at school, all the kids are fluent/semi-fluent in a couple of languages but because she's been speaking spanish since she was seven, she speaks in mostly spanglish now, punk and 2000s emo fan, same sorta relationship with mickey that she had with linda, her parents kind of feels like ghosts that never even had the respect to haunt her

gene - a lot like louise he is also a little more punkish, only eats junk food, sisters have to force him to shower, still plays his little casio but its a lot more decorated and falling apart, kept one of lindas scarves and wears it everywhere he goes, snores loud as FUCK, even worse at reading rooms, met alex and courtney and are close with both of them, also knows spanish but is also fluent in russian because of a carnie named Georgi (doesnt exist but i made them exist), he picked it up so fast!! (ref to eugene mirman), listens to classic hiphop and jazz, close with mickey in the way he was close with bob, remembers his parents fairly well but feels more upset theyre gone than mad at what they did

tina - pretty similar to her original character, just more emotionally muted, like similar to the first seasons but maybe more angry, pretty blank and silent until shes around her siblings, then she gets more animated and seems a bit happier, remembers all of it the most, learned to be a really good fighter, incredibly strong but too thin, gives most of her food to louise and gene, very messy oversized clothes, sweaters and jewelry she made herself, cries in her sleep, when she goes back to school (she's the last to do so), all her old friends (jj, zeke, jocelyn, tammy, susmita, etc.) sit next to her silently and act like she was always there (shes so grateful they never treated her differently even after everything), knows a lot of languages, fluent in english and spanish very good at mandarin knows a little bit of italian and knows every russian curse word, listens to riot grrrl and old hippie rock mickey showed her, very close with all the carnies, especially a lady named Bernie (also does not exist in canon, i made her up), remembers everything, still loves her parents more than anything, just wants them back in her life

bob and linda - in prision, rotting like the people they killed, as much as i love them in canon, this version of them deserves to rot

merry christmas to everyone who celebrates but ESPECIALLY to the person who decided to make trev sing a song about how he’s in love with (feels used by) jimmy sr pesto because that’s so funny (i cried exactly 2 tears) this christmas all i want is for them to kiss (i am only half joking)

imagine. sam and bucky will have a really bad argument because bucky still acts extremely protective of him. sam thinks its because he didnt take the serum and bucky thinks hes weak. but its only because bucky loves him too much to see him suffer and he cant bear to lose him. classic fight whatever. BUT THEN bucky has a complete breakdown about how he hasnt felt this way since.... and he trails off but obviously he means steve and while Bucky spills all of this we just see sam's expression soften from anger into quiet understanding and then they silently hug or maybe kiss or smth idk who cares WHO CARES.

January 2025 Southern California wildfires

Sobbing, sobbing

choking on dinner

Triggered

fires, fires

the LA fires

28 years gone

my stickers, my toys

gone, gone

fire and flame

terrified of fire

for so long

Youtuber story

NO ONE DESERVES THIS

no one, no one

fire and flame

sobbing, sobbing

mirroring strangers

my family, me

all to rubble, smoldering

Also getting in my feelings a bit, may the leopards not go hungry.

Sticker available.

"goodness knows the wickeds lives are lonely goodness knows the wicked die alone it just shows when youre wicked youre left only on your own" GLINDA KNOWS SHE COULDVE CHANGED THAT HER SURVIVORS GUILT IS GONNA BE CRAZY I AM SO SAD

Reblog if you think a woman can be complete without children

Y’ALL HAVE TIME TO REBLOG THIS. IT TAKES LESS THAN FIVE SECONDS.

i’ve never watched it’s always sunny in philadelphia, but i need mac and dennis to fuck. not because i think they’re good for each other but because im so sick and fucking tired of hearing about it. and also from what i’ve seen charlie dee and frank are also tired of hearing about it. please let them just make out. it’ll make so many things so much easier. god bless.