Sorry I Am Late!

DM (as goblin): Holzi eat fresh meat!

Elf Paladin: Holzi… are you Gollum?

Dwarf Barbarian: Oh my god, he is Gollum! We found him in a cave!

Paladin: And you kidnapped him to take him on a journey.

Barbarian: And I’m a small person!

JUST FUCKING LISTEN. 

THIS IS HALLOWEEN BUT NOT LIKE YOU KNOW IT

reblog so others can hear it!

-Vitamin String Quartet- 

Druid: Wait, if we hit a dude in the nuts they take force damage?

DM: Yep.

Fighter: Damn. I should have been kicking people more.

Warlock: An eldritch blast to the dick.

Sorcerer: I can’t believe I just killed that unicorn Monk: to be fair it was being racist

Jason using his guns as blunt weapons is so funny like imagine ur getting shot at by the Red Hood, he runs out of ammo, you think you have a chance and he just throws the fucking pistol at you

Pichu and charizard fusion