10.03.2021 (Part2)

I am chaos,

I am cursed,

I bring destruction to the table,

I ruin everything,

Everything that I have ever touched,

Everything that I have ever felt,

Everything...that I have ever loved.

You people don't understand, do you?

You people don't understand how much i love him. My love for this man is like a burning passion. It burns me inside out in the most ethereal way. It became the only thing that would urge me to reach the other edge of the world.

This world made love become such a joke. I agree, the definition of love is not fixed. It is different for various people and it changes with the course of time. However, I don't get how it became to this. People are so easy to walk away from love. People are so easy to make love insignificant. People are so easy to to choose a good time over a good thing.

Because of this, I've suppressed my love for him for months now. People made me believe that love is secondary. Love is not something to yearn for. People were so quick to categorise me as a crazy obsessive person. And because of this, I've tainted my own love for him. But not anymore, I will not listen to anyone anymore when it comes to my love for him. I will do solely what my heart desires more for him.

You can call me a crazy lover, you can call me an obsessive person, you can call me a hopeless romantic. I will not care what you call me because only me, my heart, my brain and my body knows how much love I have for him.

I want to be able to go on top of a mountain and scream to the world that I am yours.

But, it will only be possible if you accept me as yours.

10.03.2021 (Part1)

Hii Tumblr People❤️

Shu here and I just wanna share a small insight of my recent days.

So, I live on an island in the Indian Ocean where there were zero local cases of Covid19 for the last 3 or 4 months. Life here was back to normal compared to other countries. However, two days ago the authorities found a local case and since then the numbers keep increasing. The government came forward yesterday to address that we will be in lockdown for around 2 weeks.

So since there isn't much to do at home, I've decided that I will take this opportunity to share more here; about my day, the news, and much more.

As you can see in the picture, today is a good day. It's sunny with a little bit of wind. The perfect weather for a beach day. Sadly covid19 said no to beach day. I'm feeling rather overwhelmed lately. I've been feeling a lot, both negative and positive and it's hard to control. I'll do my best to sort those feelings out.

You people can follow me for more and I appreciate any support. ❤️

Lately, I've been wanting someone to compliment me.

I have so much self hatred in myself these days that I can't look at the camera or the mirror without my smile fading.

I want someone to tell me that I'm worthy, that I'm not as bad as I think i am and that it will get better.

𝓘 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓱𝓲𝓶.

I love him in a way,

Inexplicable by my soul.

I love him in a way,

That can only be felt.

I love him in a way,

Where peace and chaos coexist.

I wish to make my love pure again.

“i don’t like writing about my day, but i want to keep a journal”:

quotes and copywork. when reading, if you find something you enjoy, just copy it into the notebook. you can copy a whole chapter if you wish, highlighting what caught your attention the most.

definitions. look up on a dictionary and copy it. you could write your own dictionary as well, making up definitions for words.

lists. a classic, write movies to watch, books to read, the playlist of the month or just the groceries you have to buy.

maps. when going somewhere, you could draw the route you took or just a map of the place itself. just look up the place on google maps and copy it. you can draw a little map of all the places you have lived or the schools you have attended as well.

photos

take “notes” as you watch movies / documentaries. write down phrases that caught your attention or doodle.

illustrations and clippings. if you see an image or piece of art that you liked, put it in your journal. if it’s from a book or from a magazine I would recommend scanning it, tho’. it will serve as a record of what kind of art you enjoy through the years.

newspaper clippings from the day.

tickets and pamphlets. from movies, museums, transportation.

postcards

records. you could record for a month what the temperature was when you woke up and when you went to sleep. if you do that for a year, it gives you a better notion of the passing of seasons. you could record rainfall and other seasonal changes as well. you could choose something (an animal, a plant, an item or object) and write down every time you see it.

rubbings of leaves, coins, landmarks.

count. there’s a scene in the movie Coraline (2009) where Coraline’s dad tells her to go count the windows. you could do the same type of counting game if you are bored and write down.

mindmaps/sketchnotes + timelines of books, movies, music albums.

collages

pressed leafs and flowers

your collections. if you collect anything you could write down an inventory or maybe try to draw the items.

recipes. write down recipes and give it a score every time you try it. you could do the same for drinks you try out.

stickers

comic strips. you can find a bunch of it online, glue your favorites in your notebook.

You're lonely?

You mean you write down all your feelings in a journal or as a note in your phone because you have no one to pour them out to who can truly understand you.

The best thing I've come across in a while.

“I used to be a villain like you, then I took a Natsu to the face.”

—

Jellal, Laxus, Hades, Zeref, Acnologia

Send by anonymous