Discworld is so delightful because you get lines like "When banks fail, it is seldom bankers who starve" except it's spoken by a 7 foot tall sentient clay statue named Pump 19 and directed to a man whose name is Moist von Lipwig
DNI if you:
Got it from Agnes
Got it from Jim
Got it from Louise (we all agree)
Got it from Harry
Got it from Marie
Got it from me (everybody knows!)
Got it from Daphne
Got it from Joan (who picked it up in County Cork, a-kissing the Blarney Stone)
Gave it to Sheila
Got it from Francois and Jacques (a-ha! Lucky Pierre)
Got it from Edith (who gets it every spring)
Got it from your Daddy (who just gives you everything)
Gave it to Daniel (whose spaniel has it now)
Your dentist even got it (and we're still wondering how?)
Got it from Agnes
Or maybe it was sue?
Or Millie
Or Billie
Or Gillie
Or Willy (IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO!)
Got it at the club
Or at the pub
Or in the loo
And fair warning, before you follow, if you will be my friend, then I might (mind you, I said "might"!) give it to you!
every time i make a mistake im like theyre going to put me down like a sick dog
Vetinari in Feet Of Clay is so fucking funny because he's like "I am a calculated, coldblooded tyrant" and then voluntarily microdoses himself with arsenic to spend more time with his crush
Sure, call me a hopeless romantic, but I believe a healthy sexual relationship requires transparency. This is why I only fuck ghosts.
not ignoring you not replying to you but a secret third thing
one must imagine tantalus hungry
faraday cages are so funny to me. what are we gonna do about all this dangerous radiation? let's put it in a little dog crate. and it works
of all the worlds unreliable narrators i am by far the most carnally desired
When I say "this character is my favourite" what I am really saying is "this character is easiest to project homosexuality and autism on to"
how funny would it be if socrates never said any of that and plato was just lying