AU Where Tony Knew Aunt May And Uncle Ben In College So That In Iron Man 2 When Peter Goes To The Stark

AU where Tony knew Aunt May and Uncle Ben in college so that in Iron Man 2 when Peter goes to the Stark Expo it becomes a “Charles and Ellen Mulaney meet Bill Clinton” scenario in the Parker household.

Peter: My aunt gets the invitation to the Stark Expo in the mail, and she goes, “We gotta go! We gotta go see Tony!” and without looking at her and just turning the page in a newspaper my uncle goes, “Why? It’s not like he’s going to remember you.“

With great power comes great responsibility. Same motherfucker.

So my aunt says, "Fine, I’ll take Peter.”

And I go, “Heck yeah!” and I slide out into the living room in my Iron Man mask and we walk out the door.

Hoärd

Rocks

Pebbles

Crystals and gems

Buttons

Marbles

Sticks

Coins

Jewelry

Metal scraps

Plastic things

Acorn

Chestnuts

Any nuts really

Snail shells

Sea shells

Egg shells

Bones

Teeth

Dried flowers and leaves

Seeds

Pins

Patches

Badges

Stickers

Taxidermy

Fire crackers and pop it crackers

Sewing supplies

Art supplies

Cards

Dolls

Plants

Live insects and animals in proper condition (gotta love a big huge enormous jar of worms)

Dirt

Sand

Water from different locations

Moss

Pretty pots

Animal shaped stuff

Plushies

Worms on a string

Furbies

Fuggler

Any weird stuffed animal especially with button eyes

Candies

Matches

Knives

Spoons and forks

Fake flowers

Books

Anything and everything you want

1K notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

❤️✨🚪✊🌹🤗💋✨❤️

Emoji spell for your beloved to knock on your door again

Likes charge

Reblogs cast

659 notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

god i crave being domestic with someone so bad??? i want to grocery shop with someone?? fight about which cereal is best?? buy socks and stupid shit together???

3K notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

oh shit, me FUCK -

Consider: wendigocore

-dark brown clothing

-vultureculture

-forgetting to eat

-long dark hair

-constantly cold

-native american myths

-studies cryptids

-loves mysteries

-won’t hesitate to bite you

-frequently says disturbing things

-has researched the effects of cannibalism

-liable to disappear into the forest

6K notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

128 notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

If this doesn’t go viral, I’ll kms

-👑

2K notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

Female, presenting nipples.

113K notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

Me introducing myself like hi I romanticise everything, overthink way too much, live 85% of my life in my head and still can’t believe I’m a Real Person

133K notes View Post

theoneandonlybastard

5 years ago

edward: hey rose what’s up

rose: hey dude bella is dead lmaoo

edward:

rose: so will you come home now esme misses y-

edward: