Okay so like there are vampires but one of the side effects of becoming a vampire is that you can’t explicitly tell people you’re a vampire.
Like, if they already know you’re a vampire, that’s cool and you can talk about it with them whenever. And if they don’t know but are straight up like “hey are you a vampire?” you can be like “yes I am” and then you can talk to them about being a vampire because they already know now.
But the point is you can’t tell people.
So you’ve got this vampire who really wants to tell their friends and they’re dropping all these hints and being as obvious as they possibly can be but their friends just think they over-exaggerate everything.
“Hey, when did you learn to lock pick?” “Sometime around the middle ages, I think.” “Okay, fine, I won’t pry then.”
“Cool shirt! When did you get it?” “Oh, about fifty years ago or so.” “Dude you weren’t even alive. It’s a hand-me-down, then?”
“Hey check out this cool Renaissance painting.” *points to a person lying dramatically on the ground* “That’s me.” “Haha, that totally would be you. I’m the one getting his head chopped off.” “No, you don’t get it that’s actually me.” “God, I know. You’re so dramatic.”
“How long has it been since you’ve been to Europe?” “A couple centuries at least.”
“What’s this red drink in your fridge?” “Blood.” “Is it that new diet drink?” “No, it’s blood.” “No, seriously. I’m thinking about trying this diet. Does it work?” *sighs* “No.”
“How come you don’t have any mirrors in your house?” “I don’t have a reflection.” “Cool. It’s really admirable that you’re not letting society’s expectations dictate your life.”
“Hey, it’s really sunny out today. Wanna go for a walk?” “No. I will literally burn up and die.” “Fine, stay inside and watch Netflix. That’s cool too.”
“I heard these coffin beds are really supposed to help you sleep. I’ve never seen one this cool though. Where’d you get it?” “I was buried in it.” “Fine. Don’t tell me.”
“Dude, why are you always so cold?” “I’m dead.” “No, really. I think you might be anemic. Are you getting enough iron?”
god i crave being domestic with someone so bad??? i want to grocery shop with someone?? fight about which cereal is best?? buy socks and stupid shit together???
Female, presenting nipples.
Rhiannon by Fleetwood Mac except you’re a witch, lazily fixing up a potion on an autum evening while it plays on your stereo.
oh to be so tiny and filled with rage
ALEXA DEMIE AS MADDY PEREZ Euphoria 1.04 ‘‘Shook Ones Pt. II’’
Emoji spell for a little cash to come your way soon
Likes Charge Reblogs Cast
pennywise at the door like:
I’ve seen a lot of posts on my dash tonight about users who are threatening suicide, with other Tumblr members posting in effort to try to get ahold of them. I think you all should see this:
IF THERE IS EVER A TUMBLR USER WHO HAS POSTED A GOOD-BYE MESSAGE, SUICIDE NOTE, VIDEO, OR ANYTHING OF THE SORT, PLEASE FOLLOW THIS POST.
1. Scroll to the top of your dashboard.
2. See the circular question mark icon at the top? It’s the third one over from your home symbol. Click on that, and a screen similar to the one in the picture will come up.
3. Where you can type in questions, the box with the magnifying glass at the top, type in the word “suicide.”
4. Click on the first link that shows up. It should say, “Pass the URL of the blog on to us.”
5. Type in the user’s URL and tell Tumblr admin that the user is contemplating suicide and has posted a message indicating that they are going through with it or will be attempting. Hit send! Tumblr administration will perform a number of actions to contact the user and take the necessary steps to prevent the suicide.
TUMBLR: THIS COULD SAVE A USER’S LIFE. PLEASE DO NOT IGNORE SUICIDE THREATS.
Reblog this to keep other users aware. Suicide isn’t a joke, and neither is someone’s life. If you didn’t know this, someone else may not, either. Pass it on.
Me, with a mouth full of Pringles: Yah I remember being an angel, it was rad.