Just Learned That There Is A Captain Marvel Fan Club Community (I Didn’t Even Know Tumblr Had Something

I need a fic where all the magic users know that the Champion of Magic is a child so they just start unintentionally co-parenting Billy.

Like, John Constantine will take him on outings to hell. Billy will run off and come back with a piece of Constantine’s soul that had been gambled away and Billy will refuse to explain how he got it.

Dr. Fate (against his better judgment) sets up a playdate between Billy and Klarion the Witch Boy where they are just running around causing chaos (nothing harmful thanks to Billy)

Zatanna lets Billy come to her shows where he’s putting every other audience member to shame with how loud he claps and cheers whenever Zatanna does a trick.

Give me a scenario where magic users are regularly teleporting into the watchtower just to give Captain Marvel a packed lunch, and telling him off —in front of the JL— for forgetting it.

It’s my first Ides of March on tumblr! Very excited to stab a politician

I prefer Captain Marvel cause it’s just such a fun concept that when he says this very particular word he transforms.

I think it just opens up a lot of different possibilities about how people fight him considering he’s nearly immortal. Like, if he can only transform saying Shazam if he wants to transform, then how do people force him into transforming back to Billy when they want to defeat him in combat?

It’s just more interesting if he can’t ever say such a specific word without either revealing his identity or becoming vulnerable (or both)

This is mostly a joke but uh

Every time someone calls SHAZAM captian marvel I mentally go "why are you dead naming him?"

“We should give Billy Batson a gun” He should be given a kiss on the forehead and a warm glass of milk- the gun could then be discussed at a later date.

Trust me as someone who does occasionally visit the shittier places on the internet, none of you have ANY idea how bad the nazi problem has gotten online. Most people would think 'well duh you visit the chud websites you're gonna get chuds' but no, you do not understand, you are incapable of understanding unless you've been there to see the transformation happen these last few years. I need people to understand, the edgy 12 year old anti-feminist shitlord of yesteryear is gone. They do not exist anymore. Those spaces are now nazi spaces. The nazi saturation rate is 100%. Videogame boards that used to be about gooning over Dead or Alive titty ninjas are now just openly talking about the politics of miscegenation. It's bad, it's REALLY bad and you should be worried.

last night i dreamt tumblr added like a billion buttons to the mobile app so instead of this

we got this

and everyone just rolled with it but sometimes the wide naruto got too wide and blocked off all the other buttons and people would just post "got naruto'd again :/" and the only way to reset him was to log out and log back in

in superman adventures #19, there’s a villain named multi-face who can convincingly disguise himself as anyone, even tricking dna tests and x-ray vision. Superman initially can’t stop him

and the only reason he gets caught is because multiface decides to disguise himself as, of all people, CLARK KENT i’m screaming

I feel like Mary would be the one to give a shovel talk if Billy ever got a romantical partner (not likely cause aroace billy for the win!)

Like, I want her to be the protective one. Let her be the one to stand behind Billy and menacingly glare at whoever is being slightly rude.

Do you think that, if asked, Captain Marvel would tell the JL that “all the gods in my head are either screaming at each other about me or screaming at me to murder somebody to set an example” or do you think he just wouldn’t tell the truth?