Your hands are now clean of any reblog bait you didn't engage with, any compulsions you didn't obey, or any other intrusive thoughts or mental spiraling.
Gonna go eat even tho ik it’s gonna make me wanna throw up
Yippee
when is it my turn to not be exhausted and in pain 24/7 tho
Why can I not stop fuxking thinking about it nothing even happened today oh my god what he fuck
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how on earth can people abuse kids? bro this little thing is the size of your leg. what the hell is wrong with you
having a hard time caring about anything, feels inevitable that i will kill myself
This though!!!
Look, this is what moral OCD is like for me:
I walk past a piece of paper. I don’t pick it up because I had a long day at work and it’s very cold outside. This then becomes my internal monologue:
I didn’t pick up that piece of paper, I should have. Don’t I care about the environment? It’s not my trash, I shouldn’t have to pick it up. But also that’s how these things happen right? We place the blame on others as our environment degrades. It was just a piece of paper, it’s not like it can do that much damage. But also how do I know: I’m not an environmental expert. Maybe stray paper scraps are killing the frogs. You’re literally killing the frogs. You should look up how many frogs die a year so you know how shitty you are-No stop it.
I care about the environment, and I recycle and I joined green activism movements but is that enough? I could be doing more. I should be doing more. I should donate my entire check to charity. But isn’t it self serving to think that my one check could help that much? Do I really think I’m that important, how self entitled and-no stop it, reset! You are obsessing and if you fall for it, you will not eat dinner. Let it go.
Okay it’s just a piece of paper. It’s okay you skipped it this once: it could have had something dangerous on it. Yeah that makes sense. But also, that means I’m putting my own safety over trying to help the environment, which is very selfish of me. I’m just one shitty person: god how could I be so self absorbed. I should have picked up the piece of paper. I’m so selfish, and shitty and-no, no, stop it! This is not helpful. It’s fine.
It’s been a long day and I’m cold, that’s not a crime- no that’s being selfish again, you’re making excuses. You’re just a lazy piece of shit who doesn’t care about others, and selfish and God the fact you’re thinking this much about one piece of paper shows how selfish you are, you care more about if you’re a good person than anything else, you’re a piece of shit, you’re a piece of shit, YOU’RE A PIECE OF SHIT.
I get home and open up Tumblr. The first post I see says “if you don’t reblog this post about the environment you’re as complicit as an oil billionaire.” I close my computer and resign myself to looking up the state frog populations until I go to bed.
I don’t eat dinner.
The amount of frogs that die a year is somewhere from 200 million to over 1 billion.
I’m not allowed to go to therapy and i needed a void to scream into so this blog came to be
About me
- he/him
- I’m a minor, nsfw blogs fuck off
- I’m not as emo as i seem (usually)
Asks are open for vents or advice (tho I might not always be able to give it, I’m here if you wanna talk)
There’s gonna some be fucked up stuff on here yall. Have nowhere else to yap abt it.
Gonna tag triggers as best I can but lmk if I miss one ever pls
"You are so mature for your age." Well, at least one of us had to act mature in this shithole excuse of a family.