Nopenopenope, What Is That? Mars? Mars Is Cancelled, Hell No, That's Where People Go To Die. That's What

Anytime I play a game like that, say Skyrim, I always thought that the animal just ate the gold because they thought it was food. If it was big like a frostbite spider or bear I thought they had random stuff because it’s what a person had on them when the animal ate them

weirdest thing about videogames is finding new clothing/armor for your character on dead NPCs like “its such a shame greg died but thank god his pants are just my size”

I watch football and I still don’t know what’s going on here

Someone who doesnt watch football explain whats going on here

I thought the third one read "Because you're about to be dead." Idk how I added a word

One of the baristas at a nearby Starbucks makes me lose my mind every time I’m working there by saying things that are not outside the spectrum of normal human words but are just slightly off-the-wall.

Barista: Welcome to Starbucks, home of delicious, what deliciousness can I put in motion for you today?

Customer: … Can I get a trenta pink drink please?

Barista: Go big or go home, we here at Starbucks appreciate your commitment, what else can I get started for you?

***

Customer: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.

Barista: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

***

Barista: *slams open drive-thru window* HI HOW ARE YOU?

Customer: …I’m pretty good.

Barista: Are you ready to be even better? Because you’re about to be. *hands them their coffee* 

***

Barista, realizing that a drink was made wrong: *slams open window* SO how do you feel about surprises?

Customer: ….they’re okay.

Barista: Great because I’m about to give you one.

***

Barista: You have two drinks so I am going to hand you two straws which means, FANTASTIC news, these straws double as drumsticks. / You have one drink so I am going to hand you one straw and, promise not to tell anyone, this straw doubles as a magic wand.

***

Barista: Here are those cake pops, I plucked them fresh from the tree myself.

***

Barista: *slams open window, holding drink* Amazing, fantastic, delicious, you are a very lucky man/woman!

***

Barista, realizing drink is being delayed or remade: Looks like it’s gonna be just one minute so they have time to put the extra love in.

***

Barista: I’ll be with you in one hot second. *beat* WOW that second sure was hot!

Anyway she has a few dozen catchphrases she rotates appropriately and it’s both distracting and fantastic to listen.

First pic is Blathers in the field, second is Blathers in the museum

stop drawing human blathers as a twink we all know he looks like this

In the year 2022, there are three of the same number, that won't happen again until 2111

Y’all realize that dude totally stole that idea right?

With the announcement of the cast for the Obi-Wan show I want to say IF ANY OF Y'ALL SAY ANYTHING BAD AGAINST MY BOY HAYDEN I WILL RIP YOUR LUNGS OUT!! that is all

Now give the donkey a drink of pure wine..... to wash down the figs..!

His name is actually Mario "Jumpman" Mario

Again, Kimmy asks the important questions.