Curate, connect, and discover
Regulus POV
As he turned the corner, Regulus saw James standing there, in the moonlight, staring up at the stars. He looked so peaceful. Slowly, he turned to leave, but the other boy called out, “stay.” And so he did. He would do anything for James, no matter what, which was why he was here in the first place.
To say goodbye.
“James,” regulus said, his voice coming across normal, even though he felt like a raging storm inside, messy and strange, but empty. “Regulus,” James replied, turning to face him, “I haven’t seen you in ages.” Regulus realised that this was a bad idea, he couldn’t do it, but he was here, so he spoke, “I know. I just wanted to say goodbye.” James went to speak, opening that beautiful goddamn mouth of his, but regulus kept talking, “I wanted to say that you were the only thing that brought me true happiness, that you were the reason I believed in love, and that I still love you. So much James, so much.” He could feel tears forming, but he fought to keep them from falling. “Reggie, whatever you’re going to do, don’t.” Said James, taking a step towards regulus, his face broken into a million pieces. Oh, he could always tell when something was wrong, when stuff just wasn’t right, hopefully he can find someone who appreciates that just as much as regulus does. “I can’t James,” he said, trying not to just give in and run towards him, “I have to.” And then, he apparated away
James’ POV
Suddenly, regulus was gone, leaving James standing out there, in the cold, confused, sad and broken. It hurt to see him, his darling regulus, after all those months, but he still shone just as brightly to James. Something was wrong though, that much he could tell, and he knew he had to check on him. So James went back inside the flat he shared with Sirius and found the one thing he kept of regulus’, the one object that was so familiar to both of them, that they would know it even after death, a golden snitch. He grabbed it and whispered a spell, and it started tugging him in a direction.
James ended up at the entrance of a cave, the treacherous waters crashing against the rocks, this had to be the wrong place, but the snitch kept tugging, only this time stronger, so he followed it. It got to a point where he had to conjure a boat, and sail through the water, towards an island, where he could see a silhouette of a person being dragged down by cold, mutilated hands, and he jumped out, running towards the other boy. “REGULUS,” he shouted, “REGGIE.” He got to the body, and dragged it out of the grip of the creatures, but it was limp and cold, his lips blue and his face deathly pale.
As James cradled the body of the boy he loved, he sobbed, and screamed, the sounds tearing themselves out of his throat. Why had he done this? Why had his beautiful, darling, lovely regulus done this? Later, much later, he would find out, and his already broken heart would break even more, but he didn’t know that at that moment, so he kept screaming, and sobbing, and holding his one true love.
Why does my mind travel back to that moment on the bench so much?
When i keep telling everyone and myself that i do not miss you?
Why does my mind wander everytime back to you?
Why is it that i compare everyone that comes close to me with you?
Tell me...
I would ask you if i could, but i can't
“i realize now, that loving him was neither beautiful nor poetic; it was knowingly walking through hell every day and losing myself there.”
- a.m. {trying to love someone who is too broken to be fixed}
sometimes, i wonder if i'd pushed myself just a little harder in the past, i would have held onto something meaningful by now.
- a.m. {they never last}