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Someone please keep me in check when I am fasting
I love my wrists because they are not thick and I can see how much I have already lost but every damn fucking time i look at my ankles I wanna cry because they are so thick.
For what reason??? Ugh...
I started my red days today and feel really poopie right now. Fortunately we have strong medicine for cramps at home so I will live. I fasted down the weight I put in during the weekend but now I have a feeling that it may or may not have been because of the approach of my period. It doesn't really matter.
Been craving garlic cream soup for a while now, but since its a cream soup I'm sure it's full of unnecessary calories that I don't need rn. Plus I would be too lazy to cook it so im better off fasting.
My sister asked me if I wanted to try her lavender green tea she bought and I was stupid enought to put some sugar substitute (0 cal) and a bit of lemon juice in it, even though I am used to drink plain tea.
Also I have been thinking that I should start working out but I really hate the feeling of sweat on my body, so I'm gonna look for something that is not too tiring for the mornings and not too time consuming.
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➁ Plain black coffee 200ml - 0 cal
➀ Pickwick green tea 250ml (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal
➀ Lavender green tea 450ml - 0 cal
Water - 1,7l/2l
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Steps - 6953/10000 - 281 cal
Exercise - No - 0 cal
Been fasting all day, yippee! It was really cold today and had to wear a sweater and a jumper over it and both of them felt looser.
Tomorrow will be a bit warmer fortunately, but overall I am glad that autumn is finally showing up, even though it was kinda late this year.
I also went shopping with mom and I saw so so SO many nice knitted sweaters. I always like just trying clothes on or just looking at the colors, feeling the fabric, trying to find the best kind of material. I uses to buy XXL clothes to feel comfortable in, to feel that they are lose on my body. This time I bought an XL and it felt loose and comfortable, even though I only lost 5kg so far.
I also bought hairdye with my classmate and dyed my hair from a poopie blonde and greenish blue to a color that matches Hatchi's haircolor. My ends stayed a lilac color because the blue stained my hair pretty bad, but it's fine because I will dye my hair until it fades or comes out.
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➀ Plain black coffee - 0 cal
➀ Pickwick green tea 250ml (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal
Water - 1.2l/2l
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Steps - 11499/10000 - 462 cal
Exercise - No - 0 cal
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Unfortunately I did not finish my fast, nor did I held back on "binging". I went out with my friends and slept over at my best friend's house who kept feeding me because she doesn't want me to be hungry even tho I told her that I am not, then when her mother came home she made sure I ate again so yes.
I appreciate them, because they are so nice and caring, but how can I keep up my plans if they want to disrupt it along with my family.
Fortunately I am home and tomorrow is monday. I forgot to buy a pass for trams so I will be walking everywhere this month, whether I like it or not.
I'd like to get better, as in try not to beak fasts because I have a sudden urge to binge or because I crave something, or because of family. Sure there are instances when you simply just cannot refuse because it would be suspicious.
Anyhow, this week was kind of a failure, but it's fine. I try and that matters. I reached my first gw this week, even though the weekend made me gain 1.5kg back, so that was one success.
For the next upcoming week, I wanna loose at least what I gained back, then 2kg more. That is what seems realistic as for now.
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As happy as I was in the morning, I broke my fast of 42 hours because of a bowl of pasta and few pieces of broccoli. Then later my mom informed me that we are having pizza for dinner, even tho I deliberately asked her not to tempt me and allow me to get weak when I say I crave a certain thing.
In the end it was fine, I restarted my fast an hour or two later and now I am fasting through friday and the majority of saturday.
I am still really weak when it comes to certain food and that's fine. I know that my willpower is not the best but it's getting better.
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➀ Plain black coffee - 0 cal
➂ Slices of pizza - 612 cal
➀ Spagetti pasta and broccoli with thousand island dressing and hot sauce 225g - 272 cal + 108 cal
➀ Hell energy drink 250ml (ginger & lemon) - 47 cal
Water - 1,7l/2l
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Steps - 8335/10000 - 335 cal
Exercise - No - 0 cal
I JUST REACHED MY FIRST GW!!!! AAAAA
I am 24 hours (I am logging this the next day on the 5th, but once 10pm hit on the 4th it was the 24 hour mark) in my fast and so far I am feeling well! I cooked risotto for my family today and it was so tempring to eat but i needed to steel myself. Been craving garlic cream soup tho all week ao far and maybe next week I will make some.
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➁ Plain black coffee - 0 cal
➁ Pickwick green tea (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal
Water - 2.3l/2l
Full - 0 cal
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Steps - 8284/10000 - 334 cal
Exercise - No - 0 cal
Burned - 334 cal
I noticed yesterday that creame colored flare jeans were looser on me than last time and I am really happy.
Same with my mom fit kinda jeans and my fave pink sweater. It is exhilarating to notice these things.
Fasting through the day didn't happen because I binged lmao. Not with some really tempting food but with fish and eggs because they are my safe food and I like them a lot LOT, so I just couldn't help myself. I also realized that I quite like carbonara too even though for long I just couldn't even eat it because of the "weird" (at least for me it was) taste. Kinda ashamed, but as long as I stay under 1200 cals in the end (with how much I burnt) I am content.
Today was a long ass day too and I am exhausted. I made a promise to myself that I am fasting through tomorrow and the day after, plus my best friend is coming home this weekend and I need to prepare to hang out and drink with her, so three day fast it is.
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➃ Fish and eggs sandwiches - 576 cal
➀ Hell energy drink (lemon & ginger) - 117 cal
➀ Choccochino (200ml) - 117 cal
➂ Pickwick green tea (250ml) (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal
➀ Small bowl of carbonara (220g) - 437 cal
Water - 1.5l/2l
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Steps - 7868/10000 - 316cal
Exercise - No - 0 cal
I ate only this morning and fasted the whole day. Tomorrow is another sucky one because I accompany mom to her work place then go to school so she will ask me to bring something and knowing myself I will eat it probably, but let's hope for the best!
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➁ Apples (211g) - 110 cal
➀ Black coffee with ice - 0 cal
➀ Tuna-egg-mayo sandwich - 280** cal
➀ Pickwick green tea (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0cal
Water - 3l/2l
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Steps - 8510/10000 - 346 cal
Exercise - No - 0 cal
*edit - math is not my strong suit and i added the tomorrow's sandwich's stats too...
**edit 2 - I forgot that I need to count in percentage when I multiply (my last math lesson was 2 years ago)