Ed Dairy - Blog Posts

i'm so fucking tired but i can't sleep because i'm so fucking hungry it hurts but i don't want to eat either just fucking k1ll me

June is my month this time fr.

Fuck May.

A month from now...

You can either have a month of progress

OR

A month of excuses why you didn’t.

At first, they joke about my weight, and then they worry about why I st@rve myself

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 10

I started my red days today and feel really poopie right now. Fortunately we have strong medicine for cramps at home so I will live. I fasted down the weight I put in during the weekend but now I have a feeling that it may or may not have been because of the approach of my period. It doesn't really matter.

Been craving garlic cream soup for a while now, but since its a cream soup I'm sure it's full of unnecessary calories that I don't need rn. Plus I would be too lazy to cook it so im better off fasting.

My sister asked me if I wanted to try her lavender green tea she bought and I was stupid enought to put some sugar substitute (0 cal) and a bit of lemon juice in it, even though I am used to drink plain tea.

Also I have been thinking that I should start working out but I really hate the feeling of sweat on my body, so I'm gonna look for something that is not too tiring for the mornings and not too time consuming.

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

➁ Plain black coffee 200ml - 0 cal

➀ Pickwick green tea 250ml (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal

➀ Lavender green tea 450ml - 0 cal

Water - 1,7l/2l

Full - 0 cal

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Steps - 6953/10000 - 281 cal

Exercise - No - 0 cal

Burned - 281 cal

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 9

Been fasting all day, yippee! It was really cold today and had to wear a sweater and a jumper over it and both of them felt looser.

Tomorrow will be a bit warmer fortunately, but overall I am glad that autumn is finally showing up, even though it was kinda late this year.

I also went shopping with mom and I saw so so SO many nice knitted sweaters. I always like just trying clothes on or just looking at the colors, feeling the fabric, trying to find the best kind of material. I uses to buy XXL clothes to feel comfortable in, to feel that they are lose on my body. This time I bought an XL and it felt loose and comfortable, even though I only lost 5kg so far.

I also bought hairdye with my classmate and dyed my hair from a poopie blonde and greenish blue to a color that matches Hatchi's haircolor. My ends stayed a lilac color because the blue stained my hair pretty bad, but it's fine because I will dye my hair until it fades or comes out.

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➀ Plain black coffee - 0 cal

➀ Pickwick green tea 250ml (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal

Water - 1.2l/2l

Full - 0 cal

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

Steps - 11499/10000 - 462 cal

Exercise - No - 0 cal

Burned - 462 cal

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER'S FIRST WEEKEND/WEEK SUMMARY

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Unfortunately I did not finish my fast, nor did I held back on "binging". I went out with my friends and slept over at my best friend's house who kept feeding me because she doesn't want me to be hungry even tho I told her that I am not, then when her mother came home she made sure I ate again so yes.

I appreciate them, because they are so nice and caring, but how can I keep up my plans if they want to disrupt it along with my family.

Fortunately I am home and tomorrow is monday. I forgot to buy a pass for trams so I will be walking everywhere this month, whether I like it or not.

I'd like to get better, as in try not to beak fasts because I have a sudden urge to binge or because I crave something, or because of family. Sure there are instances when you simply just cannot refuse because it would be suspicious.

Anyhow, this week was kind of a failure, but it's fine. I try and that matters. I reached my first gw this week, even though the weekend made me gain 1.5kg back, so that was one success.

For the next upcoming week, I wanna loose at least what I gained back, then 2kg more. That is what seems realistic as for now.

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 5.

As happy as I was in the morning, I broke my fast of 42 hours because of a bowl of pasta and few pieces of broccoli. Then later my mom informed me that we are having pizza for dinner, even tho I deliberately asked her not to tempt me and allow me to get weak when I say I crave a certain thing.

In the end it was fine, I restarted my fast an hour or two later and now I am fasting through friday and the majority of saturday.

I am still really weak when it comes to certain food and that's fine. I know that my willpower is not the best but it's getting better.

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➀ Plain black coffee - 0 cal

➂ Slices of pizza - 612 cal

➀ Spagetti pasta and broccoli with thousand island dressing and hot sauce 225g - 272 cal + 108 cal

➀ Hell energy drink 250ml (ginger & lemon) - 47 cal

Water - 1,7l/2l

Full - 1042 cal

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

Steps - 8335/10000 - 335 cal

Exercise - No - 0 cal

Burned - 335 cal

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 4.

I am 24 hours (I am logging this the next day on the 5th, but once 10pm hit on the 4th it was the 24 hour mark) in my fast and so far I am feeling well! I cooked risotto for my family today and it was so tempring to eat but i needed to steel myself. Been craving garlic cream soup tho all week ao far and maybe next week I will make some.

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

➁ Plain black coffee - 0 cal

➁ Pickwick green tea (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal

Water - 2.3l/2l

Full - 0 cal

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

Steps - 8284/10000 - 334 cal

Exercise - No - 0 cal

Burned - 334 cal

I noticed yesterday that creame colored flare jeans were looser on me than last time and I am really happy.

Same with my mom fit kinda jeans and my fave pink sweater. It is exhilarating to notice these things.

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 3.

Fasting through the day didn't happen because I binged lmao. Not with some really tempting food but with fish and eggs because they are my safe food and I like them a lot LOT, so I just couldn't help myself. I also realized that I quite like carbonara too even though for long I just couldn't even eat it because of the "weird" (at least for me it was) taste. Kinda ashamed, but as long as I stay under 1200 cals in the end (with how much I burnt) I am content.

Today was a long ass day too and I am exhausted. I made a promise to myself that I am fasting through tomorrow and the day after, plus my best friend is coming home this weekend and I need to prepare to hang out and drink with her, so three day fast it is.

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

➃ Fish and eggs sandwiches - 576 cal

➀ Hell energy drink (lemon & ginger) - 117 cal

➀ Choccochino (200ml) - 117 cal

➂ Pickwick green tea (250ml) (strawberry & lemongrass) - 0 cal

➀ Small bowl of carbonara (220g) - 437 cal

Water - 1.5l/2l

Full - 1247 cal

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

Steps - 7868/10000 - 316cal

Exercise - No - 0 cal

Burned - 316 cal

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ edblr intro!

I support recovery! Please take care of yourselves!

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🤍 ɞ ｡° ✧

♡ Via/Anonyma

♡ 20 years old

♡ 5'4 - 165 cm

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🤍 ɞ ｡° ✧

₊˚⊹♡ hw: 187 lbs - 85 kg

₊˚⊹♡ 1st gw: 165 lbs - 75 kg - REACHED on OCT. 5

₊˚⊹♡ 2nd gw: 154 lbs - 70 kg - REACHED on DEC. 6

₊˚⊹♡ 3rd gw: 143 lbs - 65 kg

₊˚⊹♡ 4th gw: 132 lbs - 60 kg

₊˚⊹♡ 5th gw: 121 lbs - 55 kg

₊˚⊹♡ 6th gw: 110 lbs - 50 kg

₊˚⊹♡ ugw: 100 lbs - 45 kg

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🤍 ɞ ｡° ✧

I play games like resident evil, dmc, metal gear, but I also like watching anime and cartoons.

Looking for moots and friends to interact with! ₊ ⊹

Feel free to dm, rb and like if you are active!