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I Want To Be Loved - Blog Posts

7 years ago

Im sitting outside, alone. All i have are my thoughts, but they arent very nice. I hope that the boy in my house would come out and talk, but I know he wouldn't want to talk to me. Who does? All i am is a horrible person and i don't deserve anything.


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2 months ago

Oh, how badly I want to curse you for everything you’ve done to me. But I can’t… You were supposed to be someone who protected me and covered my ears and eyes from the evil in the world. Instead, you were my nightmares. I still cry myself to sleep. All my memories of you are clouded, dark, grey, and hazy, yet it feels like it happened yesterday. I hate you, but I so badly want to love you. It kills me to know that I'll never have that with you. I honestly believe you hated me ever since I was a child. I feel pathetic. I've just spent the whole night crying. I never know when to let go. A couple of months ago, I broke down crying in front of you while you sat there emotionless, and it looked honestly like you were forcing yourself to cry. Crocodile tears. You never fail to make it about you. I told you I almost ended myself, and you acted like I was telling a joke. You never deserved me. You never loved me.


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6 months ago

And if you think I need help , the only kind I deserve is to understand me. I have been misconceived thus misjudged for ages am yearning for that feel, the feel to be be guessed right.


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6 months ago

Read the lines and if you love all the words making up the sentences, know you have no escape. Read the lines, yourself. Avoid interpreters, historians too will do you no good for they are clung to the past and love has always survived in the present.


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