So Much About Dominance And Submission Is Simply About Negotiating And Implementing Small Behaviors That

People. I’m not going to keep saying this.

When someone is being submissive? Giving up some control? You respect that. They are trusting you, relying on you. Don’t fucking betray that trust. Educate yourself, be respectful and keep them safe.

When someone is dominating you, remember! Their comfort level is just as important as yours. They are relying on you to communicate your needs and problems. Don’t suffer something in silence because you want to make things easy or better.

PEOPLE ARE NOT KINK DISPENSERS. People are. People. With lives and feelings and emotions. Give your partners respect, because they are giving themselves to you.

Sometimes obedience needs to be enforced for the betterment of the female. Behavior is learned.

That's Right vs Yes, And

We talk about how hypnotists do best when they take from improv, but I want to talk a little bit about the hypnosis equivalent of "yes, and."

"That's right" and other affirmative phrases are our catch-all tool for this. Utilization -- when we take what is offered from our subjects -- is critical to hypnosis, and "that's right" doesn't just tell them that they're doing a good job. It says "I see your response, I'm paying attention, and you're responding perfectly."

That's the "yes" part. The "and" part is the other half of utilization: all responses the subject gives us are useful to hypnosis.

When your partner sighs in trance, you can tell them about how sighing is a kind of unconscious release, that their body is priming them to sink deeper.

When your partner smiles at something you say, you can tell them that smiling instinctively floods their body with positive feelings, and maybe they'll smile bigger, and that will even develop into a laugh, or helpless giggling that will empty out their brain.

The main formula for attentive and creative hypnosis like this is "affirm, then suggest." Pace, and lead. Tell you that you see and accept their responses, and build on it.

"Yes, and." And it's built in for us!

A good example of an entry-level severity, no-count paddle spanking

An after bath spanking for a naughty girl to make sure she pays attention at work.

Here is an (exaggerated/fantasy) example of conditioning as part of training.

Let’s say, for example, that as part of a discussion and negotiation regarding what things might be part of a submissive’s practice goals it is mutually acknowledged that the submissive wants to improve on their cum swallowing.

This might on one hand, simply be a matter of skill training. Practice that removes a gag reflex or disgust reaction is one type of training. This is a type of training that could lead to the submissive experiencing pride in their success at swallowing. This is a type of training that could lead to the Dominant experiencing greater physical pleasure when the submissive is able to perform swallowing in a way that is more pleasing.

However, there is another type of training goal that could also come in to play. The above, exaggerated example is about a submissive being erotically conditioned as part of their training so they develop a sincerely enthusiastic relationship to swallowing cum.

(The example given, isn’t how I would go about such a training, but scrolling past it prompted the thought to write about it.)

For many tasks, like come, swallowing, or anal, sex or exhibitionism, just the performative ability to do the task is not the deeper goal. Rather it is to develop the performance skill as part of developing a new erotic relationship within themselves where an action, like swallowing, is connected to their real and sincere erotic desires in a truly enthusiastic way.

Training to simply perform a task or to develop a specific skill is different as a goal of a BDSM practice as compared to training to develop a different personal relationship within performing a task. Because of this the entire approach to training and practice will be quite different.

It is important to understand the difference between simple skill training and practicing to intentionally develop or change one’s erotic enthusiasm.

Groomed into being a cum addict. Made to swallow cum when forced to give blowjobs. Everything is tainted with cum. My drinks, my food. Even my toothpaste. Which is just straight-up cum on my toothbrush. You do this for months. Making me crave it, making me so addicted! Nothing tastes right. Nothing tastes as good as cum! I beg and plead for it when it’s not added to my food or drink. I crave it so much that even in public, I give blowjobs just so I can get my fix. I'm a whore and all you do to pay is to make sure you cum in my mouth.

[any reason for a limit is valid]

Perfect isn’t possible, but being a person who consistently practices makes you a good girl

Drool hehe

🤤😵‍💫

You can't be obedient only when you feel like it or only when it suits you. If you promise Him your obedience then give Him your obedience. Always.

You are responsible for developing your own enthusiasm for and fulfillment of your practice.

Being worthy of the effort it takes from your owner to be your Dominant is one of the most essential things a submissive can learn about their role and responsibilities.

(This is also true of Dominants.)

Be so thankful that you not only have fun in the experiences you have together, but be so thankful that you show it by DOING THE WORK between experiences so that you bring real growth and supportive energy into the experiences.

🇨🇦𝛂♂